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boyfriend wont take the hint


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Posted

i have been trying unsuccessfully to dump him for weeks. He wont take the hint, so i decided to write him a letter today letting him know it really is over. Good idea, or bad idea?

Posted

Great screen name.

 

A letter might work. What have you tried so far?

 

And there's always the restraining order route.

  • Author
Posted

thanks for the reply. The screenname provides enough privacy for me to post on here without him finding me. Also, i have tried talking to him. It just ends up him trying to convince me he can do better and will change. And i just give up talking to him because things never change. He still is addicted to drugs, and keeps them in our home. So i decided to explain to him why we needed to break up in letter form, seeing as we have no communication.

Posted

You live together? How is that going to work when you break up, who's on the lease? If he doesn't get the point, maybe it's time to have him escorted out. Change the locks.

Posted

Do I understand correctly that you still live with him? That certainly makes it a little more difficult. If that's the case, how are you going to work that? Are both your names on the lease/deed? Which of you do you see moving out?

 

If I'm mistaken, and you don't live together, I'd suggest telling him (again) that it's over, period, and go full no contact.

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Posted

fun thing about this is, we are on a month by month lease. meaning i will have to buy out his half of our deposit, because i have nowhere else to go. He will be staying with his mom, because she already does everything else for him.

  • Author
Posted

his mom is under the impression that he is completely sober. And i cant really afford to put him through rehab. I just need out so i can start focusing on making something of myself, and thats hard to do when you are parenting a 23 year old boy at the age of 22.

Posted

Explain to him why he is leaving, that you can't help him until he's ready to help himself, and that this is it. Kick him out, change the locks, and let him take care of himself.

 

It's said that he needs rehab, but nothing you say or do will help until he's ready to change.

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