Thomas X Forever Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 I wonder? And good God, I suck at approaching girls too. I used to be something special at it, but after dating a girl I loved for so long, I forgot. COMPLETELY. It S-U-C-K-S. Bad.
hopesndreams Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 Being attractive means different things to different people. You can either look like you stepped out of a magazine (as in yourself) and are considered attractive right off the bat..or like most people, you work what you got. Nice eyes? Nice smile? Who knows. Point is, whether you think or know you are attractive doesn't matter...it's what the other person thinks (the one you are interested in).
frustrated&sad Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 I must laugh here. I was quite literally just thinking the same question. How do you know? I guess you just hope you are! After getting dumped, I don't think anyone feels particularly attractive. It's like appearance dismorphia. Perhaps we feel more attractive when your confidence returns. Here's to hoping....
smookie Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 That's kinda true what you said... I broke up with my ex but I do not feel like I am attractive at all ... Guilt ... that has alot to do with it ... sad there is something else ... when we are feeling at asorts with ourselves it really shows in many ways ... first our apperance is effected just my 2 cents but I believe it is so ...
UBW Posted July 31, 2009 Posted July 31, 2009 Well the answer lies with how women view you. It all has to do with the things that women view as attractive. You don't have to be a model to be attractive. I bet when you met that girl you was with for so long, you were doing the things that make you attractive naturally. Now that you are single, your self conscious about it. Well women are like men in that they do tend to give handsome men more of a chance but even handsome men can make themselves unattractive very quickly. Women do not look at attraction the same way that we do. Men look at beauty. Women look at a variety of things in men. Some off these things are: How confident are youHow bold are youDo you listenHow engaging you areDid you create a moment with themYour Body LanguageDo you dress and looks niceHow sociable are you and how much social value do you haveAre you a leaderCan you make their lives a little more interesting than it already is Women look at the whole picture and can size you up pretty quickly. In a matter of seconds to be exact. They can sniff out if your self conscious just by your body language. In fact they can size you up just on your body language alone. All these factors determine whether or not your attractive.
headlesschicken Posted July 31, 2009 Posted July 31, 2009 how can anybody "know" anything? oh no i'm about to get all philosophical on ya. you can form opinions based on your upbringing, the actions and opinions of those around you, cultural and societal norms.......personality disorders, lol.....self-confidence, self-esteem/delusion....take it all together and decide if you are attractive or not. i feel more attractive when i'm happy with the way my life is going. i think it's a confidence thing.
You'reasian Posted August 1, 2009 Posted August 1, 2009 I wonder? And good God, I suck at approaching girls too. I used to be something special at it, but after dating a girl I loved for so long, I forgot. COMPLETELY. It S-U-C-K-S. Bad. Approaching girls and being attractive are two seperate things. You're physical attraction to another person is subjective to their preferences, but also depends on your build, your body language, your emotional state etc. Approaching girls after being in a long-term relationship requires you to be fully "single" and maybe a little selfish. You can't think that the person you're looking at is a potential partner - because then you start coming across as dependable, considerate, polite - which you were in that relationship. To attract, requires you to be single minded. Once you get that mind set, you'll be fine. Its a double edged sword though - to be single minded and motivated to score, people are going to judge you negatively, whereas you come in with a more personable, polite approach and you're throwing yourself into the friend zone.
Green Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Hope for the best and just assume you're attractive and plan for the worst and don't rely on your looks and instead rely on your wit, confidence and be fun to attract women.
Thornton Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Attraction has several components. One of the main components is looks: if you're considered to be classically good looking then you have a head start. Behaviour is also a factor: i.e. confidence, flirtatiousness, body language, etc. Personality is also important: when people get to know you, your personality may appeal to some but not to others. A lot of times people will overlook imperfect looks because they like your personality, and some more shallow people will overlook personality flaws because they like your looks. I guess the best way to judge your own attractiveness is by third party opinion; if a lot of people find you attractive, or you get a lot of glances in the street and a lot of people eyeing you up and down, you're obviously quite attractive.
alphamale Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 if you're attractive people will tell you, in addition you'll get lots of looks and smiles. people tend to look more at things they like
Lishy Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Thomas, you are a model ... you cant be a model unless you are attractive and I have seen your pics and yes, you are very attractive!
alphamale Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Thomas, you are a model ... you cant be a model unless you are attractive and I have seen your pics and yes, you are very attractive! so why can't he get any chicks?
Lishy Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 so why can't he get any chicks? Because he is mentally ill and fixating on his ex I think
Yamaha Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Women look at the whole picture and can size you up pretty quickly. In a matter of seconds to be exact. They can sniff out if your self conscious just by your body language. In fact they can size you up just on your body language alone. If women are so damn good at sizing up men in seconds (they look at the whole picture) then why is the divorce rate over 50%? Are men fooling women?
MSUE Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 I wonder? And good God, I suck at approaching girls too. I used to be something special at it, but after dating a girl I loved for so long, I forgot. COMPLETELY. It S-U-C-K-S. Bad. post a pix and we'll give you our opinions;)
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