DustySaltus Posted July 28, 2009 Posted July 28, 2009 Going back to your past relationship, what would you have done differently?
northstar1 Posted July 28, 2009 Posted July 28, 2009 Going back to your past relationship, what would you have done differently? Had a 3some.
moo Posted July 28, 2009 Posted July 28, 2009 dumped him the first time he stood me up so he could be with his ex gf.
confused192 Posted July 28, 2009 Posted July 28, 2009 Had a 3some. Good call. I wouldn't have done a thing differently relationship-wise. He dumped me for stupid reasons. However, after he dumped me, I would have played it totally cool like it didn't bother me a bit, while he tried to "figure out what I really want." That way, I would have had the power and not him. Oh well. I have a new boyfriend now. Still a win in my book.
broken_promises Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 First, I would have worked harder at not completely losing myself in the relationship. I would have stayed true to my own goals instead of taking a 3-1/2 year detour with a commitment phobe who kept making promises and not following through while stringing me along. Second, I would go back to the first time he majorly bailed on moving in together and BREAK UP WITH HIM THEN instead of holding onto hope for another year or so that things would be different. Every time the relationship got closer to moving in together or making life decisions together, he freaked out completely and destroyed my sense of self, intuition, and belief. I would certainly go back and tell myself not to move in with him when I could tell he was reluctant to do so. Finally, I would have realized that actions speak WAY louder than words... and would have valued myself enough to walk away sooner rather than later. I would have spoken up sooner and not been so silent about problems just out of fear that he was going to end things.
bella16 Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 Since my ex dumped me over stupid reasons... like someone else has said, I would have definately acted differently than I did. I did all the wrong things, when I should have just said "Ok see ya!" and NC would have been used RIGHT AWAY! Its so hard at the moment when its happening, but now I know how I need to act in the future if it ever happens again. That is the only thing I would have done different, because i did nothing wrong for him to break-up with me.
Author DustySaltus Posted July 29, 2009 Author Posted July 29, 2009 I would have never joined facebook and reconnected with her..
Thomas X Forever Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 Unless you cheated or commit physical or intense emotional abuse, then there's nothing anyone here could've really done to save their relationship. I should say, anyone who participated in a NORMAL relationship, (I defined normal as the average couple over the course of a long period of time) couldn't have done anything differently. Anyone who says otherwise, is most likely fooling themselves. Compatibility runs deep, so deep that it would be similar to the size of the center of an atom. You could do something differently, but over the greatest amount of time, nothing would change.
hoping2heal Posted July 29, 2009 Posted July 29, 2009 I wouldn't have done anything differently. I certainly could stand to have been a better person in the relationship, but if I were ready to change that then I would of. Also, if things didn't crash the way they did, as much as it hurt, it was trully for the best. What we want is not always what we need. That statement is very true, it's hard to see things when you're in pain, but there isn't a failed relationship I can't look back on and say "I can see this didn't work out for a reason" . Everything I have been through has taught me invaluable lessons. Maybe they hurt and felt like they were destroying me to go through, but they didn't, now did they? No, I've emerged something else and I'm becoming someone I can be proud of and have self respect for. If you let it, the same can be true for you.
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