screwedup®retful Posted July 27, 2009 Posted July 27, 2009 I'm battling to avoid thoughts of hope after 7 months apart. I just met someone and we have started kind of seeing one another very, very casually. Not long after, I ran into some of my ex's family and friends while we were together and my thoughts immediately turned to hoping my ex would find out, worry, miss me and call me, but it hasn't happened (at least not yet). When we first started seeing each other, I thought I was turning a corner, but the last couple of days, I feel like I may have just been taking a pill that is wearing off and the hope of a reconciliation, which I have tried like hell to avoid having, is starting to return and will only serve as a cancer in my current pursuits. It didn't help that thoughts of her son and the fact that it was his birthday this past weekend kept popping into my head (I was very close to her children and haven't seen them since the split either). Couple that with the fact that, while this new thing is still very casual, there is certainly no intensity in our connection, emotional or otherwise, which has me drawing comparisons to how amazingly connected me and my ex were. So....what do I do? Do I stop seeing this person since it is clear to me (and probably to her) that I am distracted and not able to give anything my all. Are there any things I can do to avoid the incessant return of my thoughts to her and to what we had? After 7 months, I know she is still flying solo and as recently as 4 weeks ago, she was still unable to face me when we had an occasion to be in the same place. She turned and left without a word. She still has feelings, but has made no attempts to be in contact with me in 5 months. I had hoped by now I'd be further down the path and not even WANTING to have her back, but I can't shake it. If she called today (I was the dumper and regretted it and went back asking for another chance), I would still be elated and while I would definitely be trying to keep it cool, inside, I would be bursting with jubilation. Why do good guys always finish last?
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