vertical Posted July 26, 2009 Posted July 26, 2009 I need help. I just seriously don't know what to do, and i am fearing doing soemthing stupid that could ruin the whole thing. My problem is this. I have known this girl since december of last year. She is 16, and i am 18. I always feared the age difference and so i did not make any moves to date her. I did however get her number for some reason, i dont remember, and we started to txt a bit. Well this little bit of txting turned into a large amount of texting and we would txt about 5 - 8 hours a day, depending on what we were doing. Well in early march we confessed to each other that we liked each other, but we said we would not date for a while because of the age difference. But once may came around we could not handle it any more, and we started to date. Her parents, and my own, had no idea that we even talked. Then, in mid june we broke up. She hated the fact that she had to lie to her parents, but she said she still liked me and she wanted to go back to the way it was before we dated. I had no choice really, so i took the offer and we continued to txt all the time and she now had no worries... so we thought. Then, another two weeks after this, we confessed that we both were in love with each other. It did happen fast, but we knew that it was love. Ever since we have said i love you every night, even though we are not technically going out. But last week something awful happened. Her mom got her phone records, and saw how much we had been txting. My girl took the full blame though, and told her mom that she was txting me first and that she was trying to get me to like her because she liked me so much. Her mom believed her but she said she could not txt me any more. Also, now that it was in the open about her liking of me, anytime we are together her mom will suspect her of something. So we stopped txting. I went to her house the next day to "hang out with her brother", but really it was to see her. But that day she was different. She only stayed down stairs where i was for about 5 minutes, then she left up to her room and watched tv by her self. Then when we went outside she followed but made no effort to talk to me, sit by me, or even look at me. I was scared, so i asked her afterwards what was wrong. When i asked her she was back to her normal self. She was saying how much fun she had and everything... and i stated that i thought i was not welcome. She took offense to this and said that atleast she got to see me. Instantly i felt bad and appologized, but i knew something was wrong. That night i did not see her in class (the class that we met in) and then the next day is when the big problems started to start. (i just wanted to appologize for the long beginning before the problems... it probably was un needed but oh well) The next day we were supposed to hang out in the morning to watch this parade down our street. But when i was in our private building (with friends, it was a group thing) she did not show up. Then i saw her walking by with a friend of hers and that friends boyfriend. She didnt even look in to see me, or make any effort of any kind. Then her friend that was with me said that she thougth she had a boyfriend. I was so upset that i txtd her. She said she cant txt that much and i said im sorry, and that i know she could get in trouble. But i had to know what was wrong. I asked her if she had a boyfriend and she said "No! Of course not!" then i told her what her friend told me and she said "well if you dont believe me then i got to go, bye". I said i believe her and things just went out of control from there. To the point to where she called me rude and i ended up getting tired of fighting and so i said im sorry, and appologized for everything. She said thank you and said she forgave me. Then i said "well i guess i will let you go" and she said "k" so i said i love you, and she said it back.. I was so hurt by the whole thing that i didnt know what to do with myself. I ended up txting her that night, and she did not respond. Then i said goodnight and she still did not respond. And since i have not heard from her. I dont know what to do. It has almost been two days since then and i dont knwo what to do. I can blame the lack of texting on her mom getting mad and eventually catching her again, but she wont get on line or answer my calls or anything. She wont do anything. What is she doing? Is she over me? She says she still loves me, but is it true? What do i do? Do i try txting her again, or do i just wait? I might see her at class tomorrow, but i dont want it to be awkward... Please, someone tell me what to do
Author vertical Posted July 27, 2009 Author Posted July 27, 2009 Anyone? Please, i am desperate for advice
MissViolet Posted July 27, 2009 Posted July 27, 2009 I feel bad for you, to go through this situation, being so young and all. But no one really knows what she's thinking. But I think it's a good idea for you to leave her alone. Her parents don't want her to have a boyfriend, she would get in a lot of trouble if they find out. Stop calling, stop texting...it sounds as if you're groveling and no one finds that sweet or endearing. She stopped contacting you, could be for a number of reason...she could be tired of the secrecy and trying to hide things, she could be too scared of her parents (or both), or maybe she just doesn't see it working out or that she's lost interest....But regardless, it's loud and clear in her actions that she probably doesn't want to see you or hear from you, at least for the time being. You sent her the last text message, so I would suggest you don't contact her until she does (if she does). And if she doesn't contact you, you'll have your answer....But please don't ever beg and continue to contact her, because that's happened to me before and that just pushed me away.
Hkizzle Posted July 27, 2009 Posted July 27, 2009 You're showing way too much insecurity and probably driven her off. She's already getting in trouble.If you keep contacting her again you'll drive her away more. Yeah I know you're going to feel like you're dying to contact her. Learn to play it cool or you will drive girls off. Don't text or contact her at all from now on, in fact see if you can find another girl or friends to hang out with like you don't care no more. Human psychology works that way, don't come off as needy and clingy.
Recommended Posts