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$1000 to the person who introduces me to my husband


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Posted

So I have been on a guy-aitus for 3-4 months now; I needed time off from the online scene because it was nothing but frustrating and my attitude was plunging into the depths.

 

I am in a much better frame of mind now, thanks, and am getting back into the swing of things, dating-wise.

 

The thing is, the online sites are just not working for me. I've given them multiple chances, and lots of money, and lots of time, and I've got nuthin', not even a stinking t-shirt, for my efforts.

 

As I was running tonight, I started thinking: maybe I need to enlist my friends in a more serious effort to set me up with their single work colleagues or their husbands' colleagues or random men they run into in their everyday lives. I tried that once before but nobody really leaped into gear - or else they just didn't know any even potentially compatible single men for me.

 

Maybe they would leap into gear if I lit a fire under their proverbial asses - and what better way than by flashing some green? Hence the idea in the subject line: what if I offered a reward to the person who finds the man I ultimately marry?

 

Then I started thinking - jeez, why stop there? Really, I should just start up some kind of nation-wide search - a national marketing effort, if you will - to FIND SUNSHINEGIRL'S HUSBAND.

 

I know he's out there somewhere; he is just not frequenting any of the places I go online or IRL.

 

How crazy is this idea? It doesn't sound all that crazy as I sit here eating a Klondike bar.

Posted
How crazy is this idea? It doesn't sound all that crazy as I sit here eating a Klondike bar.

 

It is crazy. LOL

 

Enjoy your Klondike on this hot summer day.

Posted

$1,000 won't cut it!

 

Enjoy the ice cream bar in the meantime, better return on your investment.

Posted

What if you and I hit it off and get married? Do I get the $1000? :p

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Posted
What if you and I hit it off and get married? Do I get the $1000? :p

 

Honey, if you and I met and hit it off, you'd forget all about that $1000 in a New York minute. ;)

 

Introducing Sunshinegirl to Husband: $1000

Being the Man Who Gets To Marry Sunshinegirl: Priceless

 

:lmao:

Posted

I have to say that you have lots of imagination... could be a good idea .. you've got nothing to lose.. except $1000. :o

 

Are you going to post 'portrait robot' of the type of guy you want.. :laugh:

Posted

If I introduce you to your husband, can I have a Klondike bar?:)

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Posted
It is crazy. LOL

 

Enjoy your Klondike on this hot summer day.

 

$1,000 won't cut it!

 

Enjoy the ice cream bar in the meantime, better return on your investment.

 

*sigh* I thought it was a better idea than that.

 

Oh well, the ice cream was good. Until I dropped it on my computer, where it melted and I had to lick it off. Imagine what I would do if my ice cream bar fell on my future husband.

  • Author
Posted
If I introduce you to your husband, can I have a Klondike bar?:)

 

Yes. Heck, I'll even buy you a 6-pack!

  • Author
Posted
I have to say that you have lots of imagination... could be a good idea .. you've got nothing to lose.. except $1000. :o

 

Are you going to post 'portrait robot' of the type of guy you want.. :laugh:

 

It's unclear how exactly I would mount this kind of effort. My friends (should) know me well enough to be able to screen men for me.

 

But I would have to think through the nation-wide strategy. My match profile is pretty good, in the sense that it describes well what I'm looking for... and yes I have good pictures and spelling and grammar... but it ain't workin'.

Posted
What if you and I hit it off and get married? Do I get the $1000? :p

:lmao::lmao: I'll cost more than a $1,000 just to get hitched (ring, paperwork, $$$ for dates, blah blah blah)

 

*sigh* I thought it was a better idea than that.

 

Oh well, the ice cream was good. Until I dropped it on my computer, where it melted and I had to lick it off. Imagine what I would do if my ice cream bar fell on my future husband.

I see...

What about shrinkage? You wouldn't want it to fall on the wrong parts. ;)

  • Author
Posted
:lmao::lmao: I'll cost more than a $1,000 just to get hitched (ring, paperwork, $$$ for dates, blah blah blah)

 

I see...

What about shrinkage? You wouldn't want it to fall on the wrong parts. ;)

 

Oh it would fall on all the right parts. Trust me. Bow chica wow wow

 

My god, look what that Klondike bar has done to me. I'm not usually like this.

Posted
Honey, if you and I met and hit it off, you'd forget all about that $1000 in a New York minute. ;)

 

Introducing Sunshinegirl to Husband: $1000

Being the Man Who Gets To Marry Sunshinegirl: Priceless

 

:lmao:

 

:lmao:

 

Yes. Heck, I'll even buy you a 6-pack!

 

Heck, I'd settle for that as my dowry! ;)

 

It's unclear how exactly I would mount this kind of effort. My friends (should) know me well enough to be able to screen men for me.

 

But I would have to think through the nation-wide strategy. My match profile is pretty good, in the sense that it describes well what I'm looking for... and yes I have good pictures and spelling and grammar... but it ain't workin'.

 

Easy solution: list the $1000 prize in the Match profile. Problem solved.

 

:lmao::lmao: I'll cost more than a $1,000 just to get hitched (ring, paperwork, $$$ for dates, blah blah blah)

 

Oh, shoot, I thought the wife's parents paid for the wedding. :o

Posted
Oh it would fall on all the right parts. Trust me. Bow chica wow wow

 

My god, look what that Klondike bar has done to me. I'm not usually like this.

 

You need more Klondike bars... ;)

  • Author
Posted
Easy solution: list the $1000 prize in the Match profile. Problem solved.

 

Are you kidding?? :laugh:

 

Wrong incentives to the wrong audience. The reward is a finder's fee, meant to motivate people to find me the best possible candidate in hopes that I'll choose the one they have put forward.

 

Not so the high school dropout who still lives in his mother's basement can pull some kind of "Roxane" routine and trick me into thinking he's something special, so he can get a thousand clams to support his XBOX addiction.

 

Silly boy. ;):lmao:

  • Author
Posted
You need more Klondike bars... ;)

 

What can I say. I haven't had sex in a long time. :confused::o:mad:

 

(But that's a different thread.)

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