Gunny376 Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 (edited) WTF! Quit beating yourself up already! Enough is enough! Smack! (And that wasn't a kiss on the cheeks) Snack out of it! Edited November 9, 2009 by Gunny376
Author trippi1432 Posted November 9, 2009 Author Posted November 9, 2009 WTF! Quit beating yourself up already! Enough is enough! Smack! (And that wasn't a kiss on the cheeks) Snamk out of it! Not beating myself up, but thanks. Just realizing there was really nothing that I could do to change any of that. I could have been super-woman and super-wife and it would have never been good enough. Believe me, I definitely was not dreaming that I wanted him back....stupid is as stupid does....already been down that road.
Author trippi1432 Posted November 10, 2009 Author Posted November 10, 2009 Hopefully I've succeeded in establishing some boundaries with the STBX.... finally. We were able to have an amicable conversation only about our son and working together towards that. When he turned it to the relationship and the ugly scene the other night (which surprisingly he was not being too hateful), I brought up the boundary discussion. 1. Conversations are limited to just the son. 2. He has son's cell number, he can call him directly. 3. He never, ever comes to the house unannounced. 4. We meet halfway for pickups and dropoffs so he doesn't have to come to the house....I wasn't too crazy about that one, because then I have to see him or vice versa. Guess we will see how that goes for awhile.
tojaz Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 Hopefully I've succeeded in establishing some boundaries with the STBX.... finally. We were able to have an amicable conversation only about our son and working together towards that. When he turned it to the relationship and the ugly scene the other night (which surprisingly he was not being too hateful), I brought up the boundary discussion. 1. Conversations are limited to just the son. 2. He has son's cell number, he can call him directly. 3. He never, ever comes to the house unannounced. 4. We meet halfway for pickups and dropoffs so he doesn't have to come to the house....I wasn't too crazy about that one, because then I have to see him or vice versa. Guess we will see how that goes for awhile. I like this a lot, but I'msure he will start pushing the limits of these boundries soon enough, have the torches and pitchforks ready. TOJAZ
Author trippi1432 Posted November 10, 2009 Author Posted November 10, 2009 I like this a lot, but I'msure he will start pushing the limits of these boundries soon enough, have the torches and pitchforks ready. TOJAZ Like I said, we will see....he did say today that his gf wasn't worried about me wanting him back, she was worried about him wanting me back.....head games....yeah. I know them really well now and luckily have read enough posts on LS to be better prepared for them. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.
Author trippi1432 Posted November 11, 2009 Author Posted November 11, 2009 On this day, God wants you to know that today is a big day for you. Yes, today. Keep your eyes open for a message. It might come in a shape of a bird flying overhead, or a graffiti on a wall, or a phrase said by a passerby, or... Whatever shape it has, this message has been trying to reach you for years, and today is finally the day. Keep your senses open. Hmmm, hopefully the message will be the winning lottery numbers for tomorrow's jackpot?? LOL!! Actually, I did see the message today.....pessimism versus optimism. Saw it with two co-workers and it hit me like a brick, this is exactly what one of my friends has been telling me for over a year. Funny, I always thought of myself as an optimist, always the "cheerleader", but I know that I did get very pessimistic in the past year or so. (Before Gunny comes in here and smacks me again "ducking"....LOL...got a bottle of rum for ya). BUT!! The irony is that for the past 6 weeks, I think I have gotten more optimistic about a lot of things. Of course, thanks to many LS friends, I am reminded that I am so much better off. For that, I thank you.
tojaz Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 On this day, God wants you to know that today is a big day for you. Yes, today. Keep your eyes open for a message. It might come in a shape of a bird flying overhead, or a graffiti on a wall, or a phrase said by a passerby, or... Whatever shape it has, this message has been trying to reach you for years, and today is finally the day. Keep your senses open. Hmmm, hopefully the message will be the winning lottery numbers for tomorrow's jackpot?? LOL!! Actually, I did see the message today.....pessimism versus optimism. Saw it with two co-workers and it hit me like a brick, this is exactly what one of my friends has been telling me for over a year. Funny, I always thought of myself as an optimist, always the "cheerleader", but I know that I did get very pessimistic in the past year or so. (Before Gunny comes in here and smacks me again "ducking"....LOL...got a bottle of rum for ya). BUT!! The irony is that for the past 6 weeks, I think I have gotten more optimistic about a lot of things. Of course, thanks to many LS friends, I am reminded that I am so much better off. For that, I thank you. If you really want to thank me, cut me in on that jackpot! TOJAZ
Gunny376 Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I've really had to learn that................................. God has placed so many blessed things at my feet. 80% of the worlds population live off less than $2.25 a day! Thanks for the lesson! Thanks for the reminder! trippi1432
Author trippi1432 Posted November 11, 2009 Author Posted November 11, 2009 If you really want to thank me, cut me in on that jackpot! TOJAZ Oh well, someone else won it...only got one number...sorry.
Author trippi1432 Posted November 11, 2009 Author Posted November 11, 2009 I've really had to learn that................................. God has placed so many blessed things at my feet. 80% of the worlds population live off less than $2.25 a day! Thanks for the lesson! Thanks for the reminder! trippi1432 Always a lesson in life to learn....it's like a never-ending story.
tojaz Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 Oh well, someone else won it...only got one number...sorry. Well then, looks like I'm going to work today. :( Always a lesson in life to learn....it's like a never-ending story. Couldn't agree more! Fun part is, the more were willing to learn, the better the story!
Author trippi1432 Posted November 12, 2009 Author Posted November 12, 2009 Well, finished reviewing all the papers from the attorney....moving on to the next step......
tojaz Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 Sorry Trippi, I know its for the best, but I'm sure it's still hard. TOJAZ
Author trippi1432 Posted November 13, 2009 Author Posted November 13, 2009 Sorry Trippi, I know its for the best, but I'm sure it's still hard. TOJAZ Yeah, I'm sure it will be, but it's what he wants.....I've always given him what he wants.
tojaz Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 Sounds like it's time to go out and get what Trippi wants.
Author trippi1432 Posted November 13, 2009 Author Posted November 13, 2009 Sounds like it's time to go out and get what Trippi wants. Yeah, well....that's complicated. I would love a man that I could be proud of because of the way he he loved me....despite external influences in the relationship (meaning jobs.....not EA's or affairs). Someone who would just listen, be there for me (and not me always being there for them)....not understand me, because it's not possible (weighing in on Gunny with his Men are from Mars, Women Are from Venus stuff).....someone who would emotionally support me when I need it, not wait until the relationship endured 15 years of hell to decide in the last minute to tell his gf to go home so he can go support the wife he neglected. So, where do you find those kind of guys...please tell me?
tojaz Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 Yeah, well....that's complicated. I would love a man that I could be proud of because of the way he he loved me....despite external influences in the relationship (meaning jobs.....not EA's or affairs). Someone who would just listen, be there for me (and not me always being there for them)....not understand me, because it's not possible (weighing in on Gunny with his Men are from Mars, Women Are from Venus stuff).....someone who would emotionally support me when I need it, not wait until the relationship endured 15 years of hell to decide in the last minute to tell his gf to go home so he can go support the wife he neglected. So, where do you find those kind of guys...please tell me? Not much in the market for guys, but I like to believe that there are good ones out there for all of us that have to go through this. We all deserve to be loved like that. I think everybody does. Unfortunately some people are selfish and hurtful and abuse those with good hearts that are just trying to find happiness. I think the important thing is to know what you deserve and not let yourself settle for anything less. We all deserve to be loved that way. Trippi, your a great woman that any man would be lucky and proud to call his own, when your ready, you'll find him. TOJAZ
Gunny376 Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 Yeah, well....that's complicated. I would love a man that I could be proud of because of the way he he loved me....despite external influences in the relationship (meaning jobs.....not EA's or affairs). Someone who would just listen, be there for me (and not me always being there for them)....not understand me, because it's not possible (weighing in on Gunny with his Men are from Mars, Women Are from Venus stuff).....someone who would emotionally support me when I need it, not wait until the relationship endured 15 years of hell to decide in the last minute to tell his gf to go home so he can go support the wife he neglected. So, where do you find those kind of guys...please tell me? I've never advocated reading a book, taking some one's advice that it contained the end all to be all ~ the paradoxal cure all to end all. For one to do so is for one to become the King of Fools. Read, learn, take from it what you can ~ and then leave the rest. Take what works for you and leave the rest for others. Nor should one believe everything one reads. One of my interest is history ~ and not just recent history ~ but ancient history. Were I to believe what I've read ~ come 2012 I can just stick my head between my legs and kiss my ever loving @zz goodbye. One of the things I have learned in my reading is that every person is different ~ we're all the same! But we're each and everyone different. By definition. To treat one as the same as all others is to do so at your peril. In my youth I was young, dumb, in-experienced, and just plain old out ignorant when it came to women, relationships, courtship, and marriage. The cost that I paid mentally, emotionally, psychologically, financially was just too high to go through again! I had to quit being a fool and get my @zz back into school? Do I have all the answers to all of the questions? No! Do I have all the solutions to all of the problems? No! But I'm a damn smarter, more experienced, and at least have a clue? I have a deeper insight into the difference between men and women ~ that is to say in how they think and prioritize things. I know not to take any woman for granted. I know about the 'Five Languages of Love" and about "Love Banks" and that day-to-day you've got to make more deposits than withdrawals. I know now why Lucille left Kenny Rogers with four hungry children and a crop in the field. I know now why what it took to get her? Is what it takes to keep her. That you've got to date your mate. I get "Bridges Over Madison County" now! I've got a good and clear pretty picture in my head now! And that's that is a daily thing! Not a weekly thing! Not a monthly thing! Nor a yearly ~ sometime ~ once every now and again thing! Yea I got it! Big time! Once she walked out the door and handed me my @ZZ! Like I said, I've got a clear pretty picture in my head! You find a good woman! True Love! Don't SCREW it up! You and Tojaz have the difference backwards ~ or I should say your spouses do. Different polarizations. You've got the MBA (or almost) and she does in his case. He supported his wife! You supported your husband! Sounds like a BR5419 moment to me!
Gunny376 Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 BR5419 = From a TV show titled Hew~Haw? Means call each other!
tojaz Posted November 13, 2009 Posted November 13, 2009 BR5419 = From a TV show titled Hew~Haw? Means call each other! Thanks for clearing that up for us youngsters Gunny. Thought we were entering another calculator gag for a second. :laugh: TOJAZ
Author trippi1432 Posted November 13, 2009 Author Posted November 13, 2009 Thanks for clearing that up for us youngsters Gunny. Thought we were entering another calculator gag for a second. :laugh: TOJAZ NO!! Not the calculator...I refuse to discuss that one! Hey Gunny, since you are a Hee Haw fan, ever heard of Charlie McCoy?
tojaz Posted November 14, 2009 Posted November 14, 2009 NO!! Not the calculator...I refuse to discuss that one! Hey Gunny, since you are a Hee Haw fan, ever heard of Charlie McCoy? Oh NO, now Trippi is coping with Calculator drama!!!!!!!
Author trippi1432 Posted November 14, 2009 Author Posted November 14, 2009 (edited) I can always spot an accountant, they never go to a meeting without a calculator....sigh. Someone pulled out a 10K today and I ran the other way, will never work in accounting!! Have a $100 10 year-old bet with a college professor......he'd retire before I ever would work in accounting....I keep emailing every year to see if he retired and his dam* a** is still teaching....grrrrrrr. Edited November 14, 2009 by trippi1432
Gunny376 Posted November 14, 2009 Posted November 14, 2009 Actually I hadn't. Hee Haw was a show I watched as kid, and in syndication. If your so adverse to accountants ~ then your really going to like me! I'm a finance major. BooooooHaaaaaaa! Silly accounting majors would avoid Corp Fin I like the plague. Were usually totaly and completely lost. And yes I have a Texas Instrument 95 graphic calcultor, Wouldn't leave home without it.
Author trippi1432 Posted November 14, 2009 Author Posted November 14, 2009 Actually I hadn't. Hee Haw was a show I watched as kid, and in syndication. If your so adverse to accountants ~ then your really going to like me! I'm a finance major. BooooooHaaaaaaa! Silly accounting majors would avoid Corp Fin I like the plague. Were usually totaly and completely lost. And yes I have a Texas Instrument 95 graphic calcultor, Wouldn't leave home without it. LOL!! Never said I was adverse to accountants, just to accounting as a profession for me. The $100 bet was that I would wind up in Finance instead of Technology....I didn't wind up in either really....just somewhere in between the two if that even makes sense. *scratching head* yeah, even I'm still trying to figure that one out. At least you get to do what you majored in.
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