V.Vixen Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 So far I have kissed these "frogs" The married one... The emotionally unavailable one.. The non-committal one.. The "let;s get married tomorrow!" one.. The pretending to be someone completely different one... The "I feel like I have known you forever, we have something so special!! ::insert starry eyes::" after one date one... The get you in the sack and then run one... And my latest, the psycho ex girlfriend drama one... I could write a book soon! My prince must be right around the corner, ehh? ***please note that some of these are tongue in cheek!***
paddington bear Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 Yeah, we've all been there! Look at the frogs, think back to when you first met them. Was there any niggling feelings you ignored because you wanted to give them a chance, any bad gut instincts that you pushed aside due to thinking they were good-looking or had some right things, or scolded yourself that you were being too picky? Bearing this in mind, for me: The one that was a commitment-phobic - said straight-up 'you don't want to get involved with me, I've too much baggage'. I ignored this. He did have too much baggage, a dead ex love of his life blah blah The other commitment-phobic - I'm a lone wolf, didn't call when he said he would, met him while he was totally drunk, on his own in a bar. Gut said, this guy is weird. Kissed him anyway, stupid chemical good mix, wobbly legs during the kiss, gut instinct out the window. He was a lone wolf and didn't want a girlfriend. The I've still got unresolved issues with my ex guy - I thought, huh, his ex still seems to feature in his life quite a bit, that's not good, but then changed that over time to 'It's really cool that he can be friends with his ex'. First gut was spot on, my rationalising it and making it something else to suit me, was wrong. The ex and his confused feelings about her messed everything up. The I've been diagnosed as psychizoid guy - says it all really (me: but he's sooo good-looking and I can handle this...I couldn't) So, I say. Kiss frogs, but not the ones that set off any warning bells in your head. The warning bells are right. Much better if you kiss frogs that you simply turn out not to have that much in common with, or who you like, but aren't physically attracted to than the toxic frogs who you try to convince yourself are really princes underneath
Sam Spade Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I'm a frog, wanna kiss me ? (I'm the paternalistic, mildly insecure, way-too-strong-opinions, emotionally available but unsophisticated kind of frog :laugh:)
paddington bear Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 Mmmmmwaaaaah! (that was a big kissing sound in case you didn't guess). Come on Vixen, give Sam a kiss.
Author V.Vixen Posted July 25, 2009 Author Posted July 25, 2009 If you ADMIT to being a frog, you don't get a kiss, silly.
boogieboy Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I know Im not a frog, but dammit Vixen, youre too far in morristown! It takes me 40 minutes to get there!
Author V.Vixen Posted July 25, 2009 Author Posted July 25, 2009 40 minutes in Jersey driving time?? That's not far at all...
Sam Spade Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 If you ADMIT to being a frog, you don't get a kiss, silly. At least I got one from paddington . Also, nevermind, i take back the 'emotionally available' part - i'm as unavailable as they come The reason I mention it is because in relationship context it is typically interpreted (by women ) as a hideous character trait, or just another way of saying of being a jerk/frog . As hidous a problem as it is, I want to point out that this is not a personality/character trait, but possibly a larger problem that has a lot to do with upbringing and broader social conditioning. Most people (men) don't want to be emotionally unavailable, but if you thinkg for a second, men - since the moment they are little boys - are conditioned to cut off their feelings (or else they're not real men), and that can be very damaging psychologically . So, there is a wide variation, but most men to some extent are detached from their feelings. I personally often stop and wonder if I'm not, in fact, a zombie , and women in my past have suffered because of this. So, just doing my public service part to not necessarily put emotional availability together with all the other crap such as selfishness, indecisiveness, sleazbaginess etc. .
boogieboy Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 40 minutes in Jersey driving time?? That's not far at all... Well maybe not, apparently the Morristown is quite the hotspot, so it would be worth it...
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