ryanrabl Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 So my fiancee broke up with me before my birthday 4 months ago..and well I went NC on her and moved on rather quickly..keeping my mind busy,meeting new people,and being reaquainted with old friends.3 days ago she sent me a message telling me how much she missed meconsidering the fact I was her best friend.Since then,I have been thinking about her..and 2 nights ago while i was watching HBO,the first film that my ex and I saw together came on.For the first time since the breakup, I bawled..it striked a chord.I thought I was progressing so well..thought I was moving on so quickly.Sadly,I am wrong. I feel like im back in square 1..my inside is torn apart.I want to send her a final message telling her how i feel about her.Not to get her back,but juts to get this off my chest and back to NC.I love her..always will..maybe not in a romantic sense.Do i want her back?Sure,but I know it isnt the right thing for either of us.I accepted that awhile back..it just wont work. Should I send this message?Im torn up...
Thomas X Forever Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 So many people think to themselves they're moving on quite nicely, progressing, etc. Those are the people who's defense mechanism is to mentally run from their problems. You are finally facing what you have to, this is natural. You're now facing what others usually face before you. There are people who run further than you, though, telling themselves they're stronger, smarter, etc... and it hits them later, but just like it hit you. Welcome the pain. As someone famous once said: "You can't run from the pain, run towards it." p.s., don't contact your ex.
Author ryanrabl Posted July 24, 2009 Author Posted July 24, 2009 Perhaps youre right..I have avoided the pain by keeping my mind occupied..especially now.Im studying so much as my last year of college approaches,preparing myself for graduate school..that I havent had time to want to focus on acceptance.
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