Nedved Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I was just wondering what people with with their ex's memorabilia like photo albums, love letters, birthday cards, gifts, items of clothing, etc. Their basically memories of your ex showing you love and affection. I have mine stored in a box and don't know if i should just dump it all out. I don't want to look in the box for obvious reasons but is there any point in keeping it? I'd be interested to hear peoples thoughts on the subject because we all have these items of sentimental value
stablesong Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I guess it all depends on your circumstances. I've kept all of those sorts of things from previous relationships and they're all, amongst a ton of other things to do with old friends, schools, gigs, etc., locked away in memory boxes in the loft. It's nice to look back on them years later and remember, provided you're past all of the sentimental feelings and all that. I've done the same with my current ex. I know I'll want to look back and remember when I'm older and past her, but for now everything is locked away. I wouldn't want to throw that kind of stuff away, but I know some people will disagree with me there. I personally love being able to look back through the years, and I don't want to forget anyone that's meant something to me, even if it's ended badly. It was a part of my life where I was happy. Of course, I'm not condoning living in the past either! I just know I would regret now having thrown away some of the things I look back on from time to time.
Road To Joy Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I honestly don't think I want to keep anything. The most important things I have are email, and it just hurts to even see them sit in my inbox. So I made a folder and left them there, just in case. But I honestly don't think I want to look back at them in the future. It'll just remind me of a hard time in my life.
LisaUk Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 If I got rid of everything related to my ex, I wouldn't have much left, as we were together 18 years! It doesn't bother me, he was a huge part of my life and I am who I am partly because of his walking out on me. I think you may want to look at them again someday, in a reminising kind of way and when that day comes, you may well want to chck it out then anyway.
td0g03 Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I don't think I can ever keep anything from my ex after what she done to me, and how depress I am. I think It would be better just to forget about her and never to be remind of this part of my life. Just my 2cent.
brock9911 Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I honestly havent gone through my stuff i packed away from when i got kicked out of the house, let alone from when we finally broke up. i just havent really had the motivation or the desire to go through them. i did rip up and throw out my wallet photos and took down her photos on facebook and myspace. in time i will gain the nerve to actually throw everything else out. keeping it is just memories of a failed relationship
t0ri Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I've kept almost everything reminding me of my ex - pictures, cards, clothing he gave me, etc. I don't look at them, they're put away in a box. I'd never throw the pictures out. I want to look back on them one day. I did throw out everything he bought me for Valentine's Day, since he dumped me 2 weeks later. I gave most of his clothes back to him, but found more and gave them to the good will. Makes me really curious about what he did with all of our pictures and cards and such. Hm.
Author Nedved Posted July 24, 2009 Author Posted July 24, 2009 Interesting replys and thanks all. For me i'm thinking of just dumping the whole box and finally kicking her out of my life. For some reason even when i'm in my room and its on the top shelf of the wardrobe i still know its there. Its in my mind. may be there's a temptation to take it down and look through it but i know that would kill me. I think i'l have to throw it all out.
lizzylizliz Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 BURN IT ALL!!! Easier said than done. My ex's stuff is just lying around in various parts of my house...but I'd love to have a big bonfire one day, and do a little crazy dance around it too.....
bluewolf17 Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 I keep everything. Lol. I have exboyfriend boxes and I put anything related to that guy in the box. I don't think I would ever get rid of them. While I know I can't look at my most recent ex's box, from time to time I go through old ex's box's, and you know what? It doesn't hurt anymore. I read the letters, cards, see the photos, the souviners, and I smile. It makes me happy to look back on the good memories. And I know one day I will be able to look at the current ex's box and feel the same way. But i'm a sentimental kind of girl. It's up to you.
Author Nedved Posted July 24, 2009 Author Posted July 24, 2009 That is a nice thought bluewolf to have a look in it some day and not feel hurt. I have to say i do have another old box from an ex girlfriend from years ago and i prob would'nt have a problem looking through it. I'm prob just bitter towards my ex right now and its giving me urges to destroy all my memories of her but i guess in a few years i won't be bothered and it'l gathering dust with the other box
CarrieT Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 When I got divorced 20 years ago, I got rid of EVERYTHING (pictures, mementos, etc.) When my parents passed away a few years ago and we were going through their photo albums, I saw pictures from my wedding that I hadn't seen in 20 years. I was surprised how much I was glad that someone had saved some of those photos -- less for the nostalgia for the marriage, but just to have some documentation of how I and my family members looked. I don't keep everything now, but I do keep a sampling of photos and some small keepsakes -- just for the decades ahead.
Cora Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 Get rid of it!!! It will only bring you pain. Seriously, you will feel better once it is done.
Author Nedved Posted July 25, 2009 Author Posted July 25, 2009 To be honest Cora i want to get rid of it and i think i will. I just want to forget this person. I am very bitter towards her right now so i'm prob not thinking straight but i think i will feel better if i get rid of it.
nomoregummybears Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 If you're like me and the old mementos of the relationship get in the way of the healing process, get rid of them. I really would have liked to keep the them, since she did mean a lot to me, but it just couldn't work out that way for me.
boogieboy Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I gathered up all my ex's stuff that she had at my apt, and stuff she gave me, and anything that reminded me of her in 3 bags, and handed them to her that last time I saw her. It was a real slap in her face when i gave her back the painting she gave me. Well maybe it was, i dont know for sure. It felt real good. She wanted me to hang onto it saying "i dont want it to be completely over" Oh yeah? Well youre gettin it all back. No box of stuff for me, she has it all now. Made me feel SO much better. Get rid of all that stuff.
andreww Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 one time she used my camera an took about 400 photos of her last day at school. there all still on there so that lives in a box now. i found a keyring of snoopy under my bed that i thru there after i found out she was with someone else and i had a photo of her in a frame. that went in the bin. it was only a "week after she wanted a break" that she found some other guy
D-Lish Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I get rid of everything right away. Delete pictures- throw out clothes or send them back. I want everything gone right away. I have never regretted that practice.
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