jessy1 Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 Heya everyone! wow seems nice to be writting in the 'dating' thread rather than the breaking up & coping thread!!! Anyway I have a small Issue that I could really do with some input on! Theres a client at work that has liked me for sometime (I didnt know this). Hes a lovely guy with the best intentions but Im just not into him in that way. Anyway about 2 weekends ago he was in a minor car crash. I got his number off a mate and gave him a txt just saying I was sorry to hear what happened and hoped that he was ok etc. Unfortunatly he has really taken this the wrong way!!! He has since been bombarding me with messages and I dont know how but he has got in his head that we are dating just from that one txt! I have no idea how, but he got it in his head that Im really into him when im not!! Hes pretty much told everyone at work we are together when we arent!! He sends me messages like 'hey hun what we doing this weekend? where you taking me?' And he talks like we even have a future together eg 'when are you going to introduce me to all your mates' etc I have no idea what to do! Im not interested in him but he thinks I really am because I got his number that one time. I have tried hinting by ignoring the messages or just replying briefly but he just keeps txtn and txtn. If I dont reply he'll send me 4 or 5 more messages to the point where I feel bad not replying!! So I feel it has come to the point where I have to be blunt with him. I feel awful as I know hes really into me and I REALLY dont want to hurt him!!! He is a nice guy, I think im his first 'interest' so I guess he doesn't quite know how to act. So how do I let him down nicely? Pleeeeeeeeeeease help me with this one. I really dont wanna hurt him more than necessary!! Thanks!
kaiser2001 Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 Hi Jessy, Never been in this situation so not sure how much help I'm going to be but the first thing you must realise is that you WILL hurt him no matter what. This is not your fault of course its just the way it is. If it was me I would want complete honesty and I think that is your best approach. Probably better to do it face to face (rather than texting) so that you can counter any objections straight away. Just apologise that he misunderstood your concern for him but that you only want to be friends and nothing more. Unless he's a complete nutter he should get the message. Good luck!
utterer of lies Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 So how do I let him down nicely? Pleeeeeeeeeeease help me with this one. I really dont wanna hurt him more than necessary!! You can't. The rejection will hurt him, not the way you do it. Just be crystal clear that there is NOTHING between you and him, and that you are not interested in changing this. Be blunt. Otherwise he won't get it.
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