dimsteps Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 since the break up was finalized about a month ago (it could be argued that it was two months, but we met up again and quickly split up), i cut contact. i hit the gym and started a strict lifting program supplemented with a strict diet. i've implemented discipline into all areas of my life. my body is looking good and in a few months time, my body will look fantastic. my confidence is soaring. i'm reading like crazy. two-three books a week. authors i've never thought i'd read like dostoevsky, who is pretty much blowing my mind right now. plus a lot of non-fiction on subjects that i've never really thought about indulging in (business, history, dale carnegie). my vocabulary is increasing and my thoughts are getting clearer. i started a job in sales last week and i'm doing pretty good. i just started and my boss has already complimented me on how i'm selling as much as guys that have been there for years. i attribute this to the newfound confidence and the fact that i'm putting more effort into everything i do. in fact, before i started i made sure to read a few articles on retail sales as it was my first sales job. guys. when i was dumped, i was left with nothing. i want to make sure that this never happens again. i will love and care for myself above and before anybody else. discipline. i don't care about love right now. i care about myself. for a while i felt like absolute garbage. i felt hideous and would avoid social situations because of this. but one day i just got sick of it and made myself go out. i had a great time and met some fun people. the ugliness was all in my head, it seems. i made everybody laugh, pretty girls approached me, i had a really good time. from then on, i realized i couldn't give myself excuses anymore. just push yourself out of the door. when you have nothing, you have nothing to lose. throw yourself out there. put yourself into everything you do and don't slack off. i forgot how much potential i have. i let things bog me down. it may take some time, but you have to realize that you have the power to turn things around as well. even if nothing i've done personally impresses you, it still makes me feel good about myself. i'm educating myself, improving my body, improving my mental clarity, etc. and i'm doing it for me. i'm being selfish and enjoying it. i feel free in a way. and i love it. any similar experiences?
futago Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 Very inspiring, dim. I started working out, learning martial arts, also started to read self-help books, hanging out with old friends. It has been fun. However, i am still having relapse. Will try very hard to love myself more, follow your foot steps.
iwanttolive Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 I'm the dainty type of girl. I picked up muay thai after I broke up. I kick a$$ now!
adamt Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 I took the first two weeks of the break up hard, i was devastated. The ex didnt even give me the chance to sort out the issues we had. She was already out of the door. She moved on pretty quick and probably was planning her exit for a while which hurt. I didnt contact her but she was on msn messenger a few times but never contacted me. So then i thought i've go to try to get on with my life. I felt empty,lost,depressed, no motivation. i didnt want to go out and had no energy to eat,talk to people and couldnt focus on work. I was sleepiong 4 hours a night. All i wanted to do was search the internet for answers to fix things. i was crying all the time.I felt no way out. I jsut couldnt understand how within 2 months she had gone from wanting to buy a hosue together to walking away without a chance of fixing things. after the end of my 2nd week, i just thought these long nights in just cant carry on. I had been out with the ex for 3 years and never had problems being single before her. So i decided to join the gym and eat really healthy. it was somethign to focus on. Within a few weeks i lost 2 inches around my waist. i saw progress in getting fitter. it was takign my mind off things. Weekends i was visiting friends, some i hadnt had a chance to catchup with for a long while. I would talk to each friend about the break up, it helped to clear my head and get it out of my system. in the meantime i have not spoken to the ex since the split. 8 weeks on,I'm not over her yet but i am in a far better place than i was when we first broke up. I'm also trying to get into reading books. Keeping busy as much as possible does help a lot because you have less time to miss your ex. Life seems a bitch sometimes and unfair
lovdnlost Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 ahhh...a feel good post! inspiring! it seems that one common ingredient i've seen in post break up recovery is going to the gym. i too joined the gym and am more fit than i've ever been and it definitely feels great! for me, i was tired of asking the same questions to my friends / family and looking for answers outside of myself. looking for answers to questions that weren't about me but more about the relationship. was tired of feeling sorry for myself and also tired of feeling like crap! once the focus changed to me, that's when everything started to turn around and the confidence started to build. the initial work of actually doing things for me was hard to do but once i started, it got easier. other than going to the gym, i started to work on my music again and used it as an avenue to release whatever it was i was feeling. i also started learning how to play the piano which has been a challenge but fun. i've gone out with friends, caught up with old friends, met some new friends and have been having a good time going out and enjoying peoples company again. there is life after a break up. be positive and keep on keepin on =)
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