Exit Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 (Why the heck can you not use the word Help in a thread title? Anyways...) Started my new job today and it was fine but I am not getting any better. I've been depressed most of my life and always have been cynical about the idea of going to get help, but I think I really need to this time. I keep pursuing her like a useless puppy dog even though I KNOW I have value and deserve better. Every day I think about the ways in which she isn't worth it, but that doesn't stop me from loving her. It's almost like I purposely want to be with someone who treats me badly. I keep convincing myself that I did enough things wrong in the relationship that I deserve to suffer a little bit and deserve losing her and having to chase after her, but it's becoming clear to me that I don't know when I'll ever cut the final string and give up. I hope I can find a good doctor and not someone who reinforces my doubts about that kind of thing. I even find the term "professional help" funny, who else but ME should be a professional when it comes to MY thoughts and MY feelings. But clearly my way isn't working.
Thomas X Forever Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 Congratulations, you made the right choice. Do yourself a huge favor and stick with it. Some people don't hear what they want to hear at first, and they bail. Do yourself one of the biggest favors you ever have, and stick with the psychologist/therapist/councilor through thick and thin. Try to find one who actually cares, though, and is not just a narcissist out for money. You've taken a critical first step towards sanity and happiness.
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