Taucher Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 I was unpacking in my new place and I was looking at my books. Anyway, in one of the books was a letter, in an envelope, with my name on it, in HER handwriting. I was reading this book about a year ago but I never finished it. Anyway, when I was reading it she slipped a letter into it for me to see only I didnt see it...until today. It was the most beautiful, heart wrenching letter that I have ever read. Only heart wrenching because she is now out of my life. In it, she says how much she loves me, how she feels safe when she is with me, how being with me makes her happier than she has ever felt and how living together is the best thing that has ever happened to her, how handsome I am - all stuff she used to feel. It reminded me of what we had together, and how I took her for granted. I also feel guilty that I didnt read the letter at the time. It also reminded me of what a beautiful, amazing heart that girl has and how it's going to belong to someone else now. The letter was dated April 2008 - 13 months before she left. I feel like sh*t. I am maintaining NC (day 8). T
playlislay Posted July 22, 2009 Posted July 22, 2009 Aww hunny, I can imagine how crappy you are feeling right now. It is soooooo hard when you have personal reminders of something special that you shared with someone who is no longer with you. The pain can sometimes be unbearable ( I dont know yoour history with her and I think you pretty much know the advice that people will give-keep busy, new hobbies ect. I just hope that she will fade and someone new will lighten up your life. Thats the only way forward Im afraid-unless a second chance is probable?
Author Taucher Posted July 22, 2009 Author Posted July 22, 2009 Thanks for reading and for the reply Cheered me up. Thats the only way forward Im afraid-unless a second chance is probable? The pain did border on the unbearable but I went to the pub with friends! Ha! I dont think that a second chance is probable, unfortunately. I havent heard from her in 9 days. She dumped me but we didnt do anything to really hurt each other, and I have bumped into her best friend who was very nice to me, so at least my ex hasnt told them that I am a complete ******* or anything. Still, I believe that it is over but who knows. I feel like we had something special and that outside influences played a part in breaking us up, but coming on this site has made me see that these are common to lots of people. I have accepted it is over (I think) but I am not ready to move on. T
Nedved Posted July 24, 2009 Posted July 24, 2009 So sorry to hear that mate. My ex used to slip letters into my pocket and books etc all the time and i think if i found one now it'd kill me. That must of been so hard to deal with. I really feel for you there. I did have something similar but maybe not as bad a few weeks ago. We both love to travel and she bought me guide to the top 100 cities in the world but on a blank page between the contents and the start she wrote a message. saying ' hope to visit all of these places with you, love you'. I only checked the book to get a backround on a city my friends and i are visiting and forgot about the meassage. I was so down but i supose i thought to myself at least she loved me once and hopefully i'l find that again some day.Maybe ist best to get it over with now.
Author Taucher Posted July 25, 2009 Author Posted July 25, 2009 So sorry to hear that mate. My ex used to slip letters into my pocket and books etc all the time and i think if i found one now it'd kill me. That must of been so hard to deal with. I really feel for you there. I did have something similar but maybe not as bad a few weeks ago. We both love to travel and she bought me guide to the top 100 cities in the world but on a blank page between the contents and the start she wrote a message. saying ' hope to visit all of these places with you, love you'. I only checked the book to get a backround on a city my friends and i are visiting and forgot about the meassage. I was so down but i supose i thought to myself at least she loved me once and hopefully i'l find that again some day.Maybe ist best to get it over with now. Thanks for that. Yeah was difficult. What you saw is hard, it promises so much and is a reminder of what might have been I guess. Equally difficult. You're right, maybe it IS best to get it over with now. Or maybe it would have been better to see it when I have moved on...if that ever happens. Still, I hope you dont find a letter from your ex that got lost! EmperorR - Thanks but I dont see it as lies and bs. She meant it at the time.
Nedved Posted July 26, 2009 Posted July 26, 2009 Its not an easy thing to find and i really feel for you after going through that. I do agree that she meant it at the time and unfortunatley you found it at the wrong time. Its even more hard now because the person that wrote your letter and the person that wrote the message in my book is no longer the same person. If i was you i would'nt read it again and if you d'ont throw it out put it somewhere out of reach because although it was wrote last year the contents of the letter is still fresh in your mind.
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