SBG04 Posted July 21, 2009 Posted July 21, 2009 After having my relationship ended a year ago, I'm still having problems moving on. I still think of her every hour of everyday and miss her immensely. However around once a week, I have a period of 24-48 hours where this missing hits a low and I feel so so down, lethargic, sad and like I just want to start crying. This is on a consistent basis and just keeps coming around. My question is; is this depression, or just being bummed out/sad? When I use the term 'depression' I mean what medically constitutes the condition, not this slapdash way people tend to bash the term around these days when someone is feeling down. Anyone know anything on the subject?
Author SBG04 Posted July 21, 2009 Author Posted July 21, 2009 I should point out that these 'down' times are because I am missing her. Not life in general or other things, it's because I don't have her and I miss her so much.
Thaddeus Posted July 21, 2009 Posted July 21, 2009 My question is; is this depression, or just being bummed out/sad? When I use the term 'depression' I mean what medically constitutes the condition Impossible to tell given your description. Depression isn't just "the blues" or feeling cruddy from time to time. It's a clinical condition related to levels of certain chemicals in your brain (I think it's dopamine, but I'm not sure) that can be measured. See more here: Major Depressive Disorder - DSM IV. Talk to your family doctor. He/she may be able to make a proper diagnosis and, if required, prescribe treatment that may include SSRIs and/or cognitive behavior therapy.
sedgwick Posted July 21, 2009 Posted July 21, 2009 It's been two years for me and I'm still in that place. Still think about him constantly, still cry with some regularity. Do you still have any contact with her? I don't with mine, and it's still hard, but I can't imagine how much harder it would be if we still spoke. As for the depression, unfortunately we can't diagnose that on the basis of one post over the internet. Have you seen a doctor?
PinkToes Posted July 21, 2009 Posted July 21, 2009 How's the rest of your life going? Are you functioning pretty well, apart from thinking about her? Or is everything a struggle? Do you feel good at times, even enjoy things? Or does everything seem dark most of the time? Are you able to enjoy stuff you used to enjoy? My depression was triggered by a horrific breakup, and medication made a huge difference for me. I felt like a 'normal' grieving person; someone who could still function and enjoy life at times, even while the breakup pain was still raw. Without the medication, it was easy to blame the breakup for how I felt. But having been dumped before, I knew it didn't have to be like that. Depression can definitely add to and prolong the pain.
on edge Posted July 21, 2009 Posted July 21, 2009 I am sorry that you are in so much pain OP. I think that you should probably talk to a therapist. If it has been over a year, there could be something more going on than just being upset. Personally, talking to a therapist has really helped me deal with the guilt, hurt, anger, and sadness from my last break-up.
Author SBG04 Posted July 22, 2009 Author Posted July 22, 2009 Thanks everyone. By the sounds of it, it's not 'depression'. Obviously without getting it diagnosed by a professional. I have very little communication with her now, however I had very frequent contact up until about 3 months ago, so it's not like it's been a full year of NC. Everything in my life if going really well and would be considered well and truly on track. I'm reasonably happy, new challenges, promotion, new people etc. I somehow think of her and therefore miss her pretty much once an hour of every day which kinda gets me down a little, but very quickly move on and try to forget and potentially laugh at a joke 10 seconds later. It's only when I do have these times of extreme sadness that worry me. Seeing as it is not a constant feeling, it sounds like it's not 'depression' which is good. Will endeavor to speak to someone though and get to the bottom of it.
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