True2form Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 This guy I'm crazy about is a difficult one. He's not two faced but has two different sides. When relaxed he can be very open, sweet and caring, if tired, grumpy or irritated he becomes "the thing that isn't aware that people have feelings" I am his complete opposite in every way, I'm so filled with empathy and worried about how other people think and feel that I can get wound up very easily when we clash at a junction where I happen to be being overly sensitive and he's having a "where did I put my soul again?" day. He can make a refrigerator jealous. Asides from that we're insanely attracted to each other and he told me a while back that he loves me. But because we're opposites I feel nervous a lot that we're extremely volatile. I want to make it clear to him that I'm not ready to be committed yet and I'm not assuming we're just bf and gf but I don't know how to say it. I think he also knows and feels this but thinks that I don't know it. I don't want to sound like an idiot really!
paddington bear Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Firstly if you're this empathetic type, just change your behaviour around him. He's always going to have his ups and downs, it's how you react to them. If he's in a bad mood, or snappy, just tell yourself that it's his problem and probably has nothing to do with you - which is probably the case 99% of the time. And leave him to it. Don't try to rouse him out of his bad mood, don't try to cheer him up, just go and do something that you enjoy and ignore it, otherwise half your life will be spent trying to either not make him grumpy, cheer him up, getting upset because of what he says when he's grumpy. I've been where you are at and I was at fault for treading on eggshells around the guy afraid to wake the sleeping lion, when in fact far better to leave him to his own devices and keep your up mood going, this will also draw him more to your positive energy, rather than you letting his bad moods drain you like a battery. If you're cheerful and just do your own thing and don't let his mood affect you, it will evaporate very quickly.
Author True2form Posted July 24, 2009 Author Posted July 24, 2009 Wow!! Thank you so much, that was amazing advice!
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