BackonTrack2 Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 Hello, Ok, something strange is happening. I've been NC for about 17 months now, ex cheated on me blamed me broke me to pieces yada yada yada, you know the drill... anyway, it took a really long time to get it together after that blow, and now like i am moving forward, i am content, happy again, having fun, dating, etc etc but yet I am thinking about the EX. I know for a fact I don't want to go down that road again and I know I don't love her anymore, I don't even cry but recently maybe the last 2 weeks, I've had a urge to call her. I called her once from a blocked number, I got a voicemail but just today, I just wanted to call her and hear her voice and then hang up, I don't know whats happening, its almost as if, I want to make sure she is OK or alive or something, I don't know. I can't stress the point that I WILL NEVER get into a relationship with her or even aknowledge her in public but still, its like... I can't describe it... ANyone have insight? This is not making sense to me, its almost as if I know within myself that I am walking away finally and I like I want to make peace or something, I don't know. I have her blocked on FB, MS, deleted all photos, threw everything away, 100% NO REMINDERS, NOTHING, threw away clothes, EVERYTHING. I think I fear that in an other 6 months I won't remember, I think that is what is happening, I think the last bits of her is leaving my heart, I think I am finally able to live with what happen and move forward in a positive light, for me at least, for her, I am not sure but I think she was at this stage so long ago. I don't know man, I need insight. This doesn't make sense to me. Need insight
Darth Vader Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 Just forget her. Keep movin on! You'll probably just bump into her someday, then what is your plan? I hope not getting back with her, because she's not worth it, no matter if she fully realizes what she did, is sorry, and everything. Just forget her!
LisaUk Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 I'm not sure! Did you deal with the loss when it happened? Or, because she cheated did you get through it with anger alone. Sometimes grief can come back and bite you on the a$$ if you bury it? Another suggestion, are you experiencing any other stress or hurt in your life right now? Sometimes loss again can re surface when you experience another loss.
HisLove Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 I have found that I was often in tune with my ex, and the times I tried to make contact were times that he was not in a very good place emotionally. There could have been months and months of no contact in between, and I could sense when he was very low. Although I would reach out, he still wasn't able to communicate with me in return (until very recently). Could that be happening with you? Also, it could be that enough time has gone past now where you have let go of the anger and resentment and rage that all come from being betrayed. I honestly believe that when you let those things go, there is once again room for 'good' feelings and emotions. Perhaps that is what you are feeling - some positive things again. It took me a year or two to be able to do that, even longer for my ex. Anger and resentment takes up a lot of space and good things can't exist while they are still front and center. Food for thought.
Recommended Posts