bluewolf17 Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 I have learned how to be more honest with myself, and what I want in a relationship. If he's a "really great guy" but can't hold a job in the last 3 years, he isn't going to mesh well with me long run. I learned to accept people as they are, but also know when to walk away when it's not working. My most important lesson learned in communication. Not holding things in that bother me. Not being afraid of speaking up when I am unhappy. Not being afraid of being alone. I've learned the true value of friendship. And that "being there" for some one, really just sometimes means being there physically. You don't always have to say the right thing, or come up with a answer, but just spending time with friends is a gift in itself. Friends don't make commitments, they don't sign paperwork. They don't tell you that they will never leave. They just are there without being asked, or explaining. I have learned that I am a great person who has a lot to offer, and I deserve to be with someone who makes me feel good about myself.
contax Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Excellent post Thomas. I've learned to not be on the internet when she's over at my house. To not cut off my friends. One thing I did in my head was, any girl I felt attraction to...I put all that energy back to my girl. Now I wonder if that's making me hurt now more lol. I may or may not continue to do that. I learned to speak in ways where I feel I am understood. I used to tell her things and she wouldn't get it. Communication is two ways. It was my responsibility to feel understood. I learned to be careful of the girl you pick! Pick someone with at least a high school education, someone who doesn't smoke, someone who has integrity, a positive person commited to personal growth! Be the person I would like to attract!
adamt Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 I've learnt that wireless internet and laptops can be a bad thing and a conversation killer. I've learnt not to be so complacent. I've learnt to be more persistent asking when the girlfriend might have something on her mind.
moo Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I learned another thing. I learned that words are not enough. I wanted his actions to proove to me that he loved or even really cared for me. All he gave me was words. But what about my actions for myself...for me? I kept saying I was leaving him, but I didn't, or I did and came back a week later. I should have performed actions that showed myself I really cared about myself. Leaving him after the first date or even within the first three months of our relationship would have been great. Really thinking out and admitting to myself that this is not the type of man that would be good for me. That would have been great. I learned that if I want to show myself love and caring, I have to take action...actions speak louder than words even if they are directed toward yourself.
georgia girl Posted July 25, 2009 Posted July 25, 2009 I learned that I love being in love and I love being a part of a couple. I learned that I love going out to dinner every Friday night after a long week, but I love cooking for two on Saturday. I learned that I don't love watching a cycling race, but I do love cheering on the person I love. I learned that I can ski, but that I'll never be good at it. I've learned that I am good at relationships and that I'm not nearly as histrionic as I thought I'd be. I learned that a healthy relationship makes you feel good inside and out and it's amazing at what a better person you become when you love well. I learned I want to do this again and that I will be open to it. There are things I will want to do differently, I'm sure, but I learned that I'm a good girlfriend, too. I am happy I did this. Sad that I got so hurt, but so happy that I learned that I am good at this and I'm beginning to realize that I really want to do it again. Maybe with him, maybe with someone new... but definitely again!!!
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