Thaddeus Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Wanna' bet? Maybe not for you, TBF, but it might be for her. Don't be so quick to judge someone else's temperament.
Phateless Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Wanna' bet? There's a major fear factor involved, assuming that if you give up what you have now, you'll never find anything as good again and be alone forever. I'm sure we all know the thought process. It's just hard to face it head-on. I've done it before and it was the hardest thing I ever had to go through, but it made me a stronger and better person.
Author BeautifulBrunette Posted July 20, 2009 Author Posted July 20, 2009 So what, because I'm 21 every one assumes that I should be living it up and dating all sorts of men? If I wanted to, I would but that isn't what I like. I found someone that I liked and he stuck to me. I have no desire to date but I am having fun with life, as a 21 year old should be.
Trialbyfire Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 So what, because I'm 21 every one assumes that I should be living it up and dating all sorts of men? If I wanted to, I would but that isn't what I like. I found someone that I liked and he stuck to me. I have no desire to date but I am having fun with life, as a 21 year old should be.You might find you'll regret not living it up, in your later years. Surf around LS a bit in the Infidelity/Marriage/OW/OM forums and you'll see A LOT of regret. Having been married once before and possibly heading down the bridal path again, IMO and IME, live life to its fullest, before closing off your options. No doubt everyone has a different temperament. Just throwing some thoughts, opinions and experiences your way.
Trialbyfire Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Maybe not for you, TBF, but it might be for her. Don't be so quick to judge someone else's temperament.My assumption with Phateless's comments, was that it was applicable to me, directly. Who knows if BB is the same way. Not I and in my comments, it encompasses allowing fear of loss to drive you, in a generalized fashion. There's a major fear factor involved, assuming that if you give up what you have now, you'll never find anything as good again and be alone forever. I'm sure we all know the thought process. It's just hard to face it head-on. I've done it before and it was the hardest thing I ever had to go through, but it made me a stronger and better person.Fear is the mind killer, for every aspect of life. Also, living life with past regrets can kill, too.
Author BeautifulBrunette Posted July 20, 2009 Author Posted July 20, 2009 Here's an update: As we took a walk on the beach on Saturday, I re-worded my question and got exactly what I asked for. I explained to him that I wasn't ready but I wanted to know what our future held ie, marraige, kids ect... I guess I am testing my waters but I feel that I need to because we have been together for 3.4 years. He said he does want to marry me in the future.
Trialbyfire Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Read Dune? Great quote.Yup, and quite a number of times, particularly the first two. The entire series is excellent, including what Brian has done. BB, I'm glad to hear you've gotten resolution.
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