Trinity Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2.5 years and we have a baby together. We have had troubles in the past but we have been working hard to make things better. My boyfriend asked me to take over managing our joint money and in the process I discovered that he has been saving money to buy me a ring. Im so excited but at the same time terrified. I cant stand my boyfriends mother at all. Saying I hate her is probably putting it mildly. She is a master manipulator, liar and a hateful person. When she found out I was pregnant her first words were "I hope you dont think Im going to be raising a grandbaby" (I was 27 and support myself, I dont know where she got that idea). Since then she has done nothing but question and criticize how I raise my son and the decisions I make for him. She has watched my son twice in all his 16 months because I dont trust her to respect my wishes for him. It also doesnt help that she is drunk a good bit of the time either. She was a horrible mother to my boyfriend, dragged him around to all these different men throughout his life and never cared about him. At any kind of family function she complains about everything under the sun from how much she HAD to spend on the event or that she had to do everything despite the fact that I and others offer to help. Nothing is good enough for her. My boyfriend wont stand up to her whenever she is mean to him (most of the time) or when she is trying to manipulate him. I have had it with her and am just dying to tell her off. My hatred for this woman grows by the day and its driving me crazy. I dont know exactly how to handle this situation, the thought of being forced to deal with this awful woman the rest of my life makes me just want to cry. I hope someone can give me some solid advice, I dont think Im going to be able to keep it bottled up inside forever.
HokeyReligions Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 If your bf won't stand up to his mother it sounds like maybe he should get some counseling and you two should get some counseling together. If/when he proposes and the only thing that is casting a doubt is his mother, then tell him that and tell him that you just need some professional, objective help so that you can both deal with your issues together and not have any resentment between the two of you. then follow through and get the help. You don't have to say NO or YES and that is the end of it.
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