ms.stressed Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 I text my ex about getting his things. He left some of his stuff like 2 tvs, a bed set, clothes and electrical stuff. I broke the no contact rule in texting I know...Here's the thing though, I feel he should make arrangements to come get his stuff! I don't want to just give the televisons away nor do I want to just keep the box springs and other stuff. How do I handle this situation?
looking4 green grass Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 If he really wanted it so bad, he would have contacted you and asked for it, or made arrangements right after the break up to get it. Yes, my stuff is still at my ex's place, but I update him weekly on my living arrangements so he will know when to expect me to come get my furniture and other things.
Author ms.stressed Posted July 15, 2009 Author Posted July 15, 2009 You are completely right. I do remember him saying (when we were on good terms) that he'll come get it in September. Had he not told me that I would not feel as bad getting rid of his things. But honestly, now that we've broken up I feel like I shouldn't be obligated to store his things! I asked him if he wanted any of his things and he never responded. Should I take that as a no?
Beeotch Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 NC isn't a rule that you have to follow blindly hon... It is just a measure to protect yourself. You use it insofar as you need it. Therefore, if you are simply asking him to get his things then it is not a big deal. NC is just to prevent you from chasing after your ex to get back with you, embarassing yourself, hurting yourself and entangling yourself in a mess of emotions and possibly being strung along. Therefore it is best not to speak to your ex daily, hang out, check up on them, email, text etc. But the occasional conversation esp about business or a particular issue (him getting hims stuff) is fine... I do not follow NC to be technical...in that I do not initiate contact with my ex, I do not text/email/call or hang out with him. But when he says something to me...I sometimes respond. I am not getting caught up or anything in those scenarios. I guess I am doing Little Contact...where I do not speak to him except maybe every 3 weeks or so when he says something to me and it is completely cordial and brief. You do what you can handle..and be HONEST about it. Do not tell yourself you can handle something when deep down you know you can't.
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