EmperorR Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 not only did she cheat, lie to me, left me in debt, ran off with some scrub she just met. Now i found out she aborted my son or daughter without even letting me know she was pregnant. I feel like calling her cussing her out but I won't break my 11 months no contact, I will turn the other cheek yet again, and curse her from afar.
kizik Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Hey, guess what. Finding things out about her is the same as Contact. Read that again. Yep, you already broke contact by digging up info on her. Sorry to say this, but I have a hard time sympathizing with you, b/c you betrayed yourself by asking your friends/looking her up. Get better soon.
kizik Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Sigh... Emp, I am sorry for the harshness of that first post. What isn't, doesn't matter. The child ended with the relationship. Please stop looking her up!!!
Road To Joy Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 The child ended with the relationship. Wtf? It's a KID. A son, a daughter. Not a puppy.
BCCA Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Finding things out about her is the same as Contact. He has a point, do your best to not hear anything about, or from, her. With that said, Im sorry to hear that. Your thoughts on abortion aside (since your opinion was not sought anyway) it might be for the best. You dont want someone that cheats and acts immaturely to raise your child, and you're certainly better off not being tethered to this woman for the rest of your life. I know its a hard pill to swallow, and it sucks that she did that, but whats done is done. Just be glad youre rid of this woman.
Citizen Erased Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 I'm really sorry to hear that Emperor. How did you find this out?
kizik Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Wtf? It's a KID. A son, a daughter. Not a puppy. The term "kid" is a lot more casual than "child". Anyway, you should quote my initial insensitive post, not that one. Sorry again, Emp.
WiseOne1 Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Im sorry to hear that, so she bassically didn't even let you know she was pregnant? How did you fing out about this, or how did the friend found out about it?
reservoirdog1 Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 Although in a perverse way, my friend, she did you the biggest favour of your life. Suppose she'd carried the foetus to term, THEN cheated on you and run off to be with the dirtbag. Not only would you be stuck seeing your son/daughter a hell of a lot less than full time (probably a few days a week, if you were lucky), but you'd also be paying her child support every month. And thereby running up even more debt. And you'd be stuck with the cheating exploiting wench in your life for the next 18-20 years, minimum. I sympathize with you man, I really do. That's a crappy thing to find out, especially in the midst of all the crap she's already ladled out to you. You should allow yourself to be angry, to be sad, and to grieve the loss, of her (or who you thought she was -- not the same thing), and the child you could have had. But, having done that... I'm guessing you're under 30. Or not much older than that. In which case you have many years ahead of you to find somebody better than her. Somebody you can have a child with and raise the child together. Somebody who won't use you and cheat on you. And one day, when you've found that person, and have children and a great life with her, I'll bet you anything you'll look back at where you are right now and realize "wow... I really dodged a bullet back then." Oh, and do your best to stop "checking up" on her. That's an order.
sally4sara Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 not only did she cheat, lie to me, left me in debt, ran off with some scrub she just met. Now i found out she aborted my son or daughter without even letting me know she was pregnant. I feel like calling her cussing her out but I won't break my 11 months no contact, I will turn the other cheek yet again, and curse her from afar. Would you rather a child existed to keep her in your life for potentially forever? If she had told you and THEN aborted it, it would just be to make you more upset. What does this info change for you today?
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