bigworm23 Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 So there's this girl I see that lives somewhere within my gated apartment complex (it's a rather big place). I see her every now and then but haven't seen her in about a month. She's absolutely beautiful, and every time we pass each other in the parking lot or gym or wherever, she always gives me a big smile, sometimes a hello. I never approached her because I also live with my girlfriend (we broke up about a month ago and she moved into another place). I think this girl and I definitely have some interest in each other, but it's hard to put things on the table with her. I'm moving out in about 2 weeks, but staying local, and I really would like to talk to her before then. Her car is parked pretty close to mine in one of the lots, and I'm thinking about leaving just a little note on her car if I don't see her before I move. Nothing too serious, just keep it casual, say something along the lines of, I think shes really cute, we should get together for a drink sometime, leave my number..thats about it. How do you all think this would be? A bit of a creeper move, or completely normal??? I appreciate it.
Lyssa Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Creepy, for me anyway. First thing that will come to mind is that there's a stalker/psycho nearby. I'll just throw away his note. Why don't you approach her in person? You both have said hello, just not formally introduced to one another. Take a chance - you're moving soon!
Author bigworm23 Posted July 14, 2009 Author Posted July 14, 2009 Creepy, for me anyway. First thing that will come to mind is that there's a stalker/psycho nearby. I'll just throw away his note. Why don't you approach her in person? You both have said hello, just not formally introduced to one another. Take a chance - you're moving soon! I definitely agree. If i see her before I move, I'll definitely approach. The note was just a last ditch attempt before I move, because I really wont have an opportunity after that point. I just haven't run into her in about a month, so I don't know if I will before I leave.
Thaddeus Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Approach her in person. Anything else, including little notes attached to her car, may come off as either creepy or a sign of low confidence, or both.
lab_brat Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 I think its a good plan. Not creepy at all. Very cute.
Author bigworm23 Posted July 14, 2009 Author Posted July 14, 2009 Everyone keeps saying, approach her in person. I'm with you all on this one. If I see her before I move, this is definitely the method of choice. The note is just there in case I don't see her before I move in 2 weeks...perhaps I should say somethign about having to move int he note? I dont know, I'm overthinking this now...I just didn't want to move and never see/talk to this chick because of circumstances...note seemed like the second best option at this point..
Bayern Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 I just haven't run into her in about a month, so I don't know if I will before I leave. Yeah, I'm not sure what people aren't understanding about the above statement. If he could....he would... Not creepy at all in my opinion. Just a friendly note is no problem at all. Maybe she'll wonder "who is this?", but as soon as she sees you she'll remember. I don't see what the big deal is, honestly. Good luck.
Lyssa Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Yeah, I'm not sure what people aren't understanding about the above statement. If he could....he would... Not creepy at all in my opinion. Just a friendly note is no problem at all. Maybe she'll wonder "who is this?", but as soon as she sees you she'll remember. I don't see what the big deal is, honestly. Good luck. You're a guy... probably that's why. Then again, perhaps there are girls out there that like this kind of approach. BW32, do whatever you think is best. It's just something I, as female, wouldn't feel comfortable about.
utterer of lies Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Everyone keeps saying, approach her in person. I'm with you all on this one. If I see her before I move, this is definitely the method of choice. The note is just there in case I don't see her before I move in 2 weeks...perhaps I should say somethign about having to move int he note? I dont know, I'm overthinking this now...I just didn't want to move and never see/talk to this chick because of circumstances...note seemed like the second best option at this point.. Or maybe you don't leave it to chance, and ring at her door and ask her out? It might seem scary, but the direct approach is usually the best.
Bayern Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 You're a guy... probably that's why. Then again, perhaps there are girls out there that like this kind of approach. True. This is a resource I can't have.
Author bigworm23 Posted July 14, 2009 Author Posted July 14, 2009 Or maybe you don't leave it to chance, and ring at her door and ask her out? It might seem scary, but the direct approach is usually the best. Not even sure where her apt. is. We live in a huge complex. I used to see her walking around the parking lot, or at the gym.
Thornton Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 I would try to approach her in person if possible - say you're moving out of the complex and you want to ask her to meet for coffee before it's too late. Keep popping out to your car if you have to, that way you have more chance of catching her. Could you not ask someone (maybe the security guard if you have one, or the landlord?) which apartment she lives in, and then drop by and say the same thing - you're moving and you wanted to ask her out before you miss the chance...? If necessary you could even knock on every door in the complex and ask if she lives there - if I was really interested in someone I'd be tempted to do this as a last resort - who cares what the neighbours think, you're moving anyway. I would only leave a note as an absolute last resort, if you can't catch her and can't find out which apartment she lives in. Because she's very likely to throw the note away because she doesn't know who you are. If you do decide to leave a note, make sure you give your name and also a description of yourself, and say you live in the complex and have spoken to her many times, so she knows you're not some stranger. Write that you're moving, invite her out, and give your phone number so she can call you. You could also possibly ask if she could still call/text even if the answer is no, just so you know that she actually received the note and it didn't blow away.
Author bigworm23 Posted July 14, 2009 Author Posted July 14, 2009 I would try to approach her in person if possible - say you're moving out of the complex and you want to ask her to meet for coffee before it's too late. Keep popping out to your car if you have to, that way you have more chance of catching her. Could you not ask someone (maybe the security guard if you have one, or the landlord?) which apartment she lives in, and then drop by and say the same thing - you're moving and you wanted to ask her out before you miss the chance...? If necessary you could even knock on every door in the complex and ask if she lives there - if I was really interested in someone I'd be tempted to do this as a last resort - who cares what the neighbours think, you're moving anyway. I would only leave a note as an absolute last resort, if you can't catch her and can't find out which apartment she lives in. Because she's very likely to throw the note away because she doesn't know who you are. If you do decide to leave a note, make sure you give your name and also a description of yourself, and say you live in the complex and have spoken to her many times, so she knows you're not some stranger. Write that you're moving, invite her out, and give your phone number so she can call you. You could also possibly ask if she could still call/text even if the answer is no, just so you know that she actually received the note and it didn't blow away. This sounds pretty sensible. Probably the route I'm going to go..minus the knocking on every door
BenThereDunThat Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 It has the potential to be creepy, but in this case I don't think so. I'd put in there how you were really hoping to see her before you moved and since it didn't happen, didn't want to miss out on the chance of meeting her. I had a guy leave stuff on my car in my old apt. complex. NEVER said who he was for the first few notes (and they were always accompanied by little gifts too) and then finally left a phone # that he said would go straight to voice mail so I could leave him a message. Needless to say, I didn't call. Then I got a nasty note from him that I was a stuck up snob. CREEPED me right the f**k out. My point is, just be totally upfront about the whole thing.
tkgirl Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 I think a more direct approach is probably best. I've actually had the note thing happen to me before... by a guy that lived by me.. we would see each other a lot when we were out walking our dogs. He left me a very sweet note, saying how he's been wanting to ask me out etc. I was flattered and when met up later for coffee. Turns out he was very shy... very sweet but very shy... too shy! Add that to the fact that he asked me out through a note made him seem a little insecure to me... not attractive. He wanted to go out again but I ended up saying no... Anyways... I guess what I'm saying is the note thing can work, but I think most women (like myself) prefer a more direct approach.. shows more confidence and all that. I hope you get that chance and you see her soon... Good Luck! and keep us posted
Lyssa Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 I think a more direct approach is probably best. Exactly. The same thing happened, but I didn't bother to call cause it was just creepy. Plus it wasn't just one note... it was more than one and went for weeks! Can you say creepy? Or stalker much? BW32, you sound like a nice guy and I'm sure you wouldn't stalk her but like almost everyone here has said : direct approach is the best. If you still don't see her, then I guess you can leave the note... if not, there will always be other girls out there. Who knows, you might bump into one in your new area. Good luck!
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