jenny Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 this is a general poll: i am <casually> dating a fellow who fulfills all necessary socio-economic requirements. plus he's funny. i don't date seriously, this is not a big deal, but he does have a few issues that i can recognize already. i'm not sure if they are enough to nip this in the bud or not. everyone has problems, i realize this. but i have a number of "glass slippers" in dating that i am not willing to overcome. i just want to get a general sense if mine are relatively normal or not. so, my poll question to LSers is : how much can you handle? when do problems cross over into dysfunction?
ThisGirlNameKD Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 It's hard to say....some people can take the crap from other people that others can't tolerate. Maybe you should tell us some of the things you don't want to put up with or some of his problems and we can tell if you if you should beware or not.
moimeme Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 I think it can be a mistake to worry about normalcy. As TGNKD said, each person has his or her own limits. It's really a question of up with what you will not put. People live with alcoholics for twenty years. I couldn't imagine that, but I'm not them.
vintim53 Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 What can I say? If it's a problem that is keeping me awake, or consuming my thoughts for long periods of time then its too much..adios and keep shopping.
Ryan Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 I can usually tell within 5 minutes of talking to someone (in person) if I'd be interested. There are some definite deal breakers....as soon as I find out, no chance. The most recent in discussion amongst my circle is what we've dubbed the "hoodie"......clitoral piercing of any type.
wiseOLDman Posted November 6, 2003 Posted November 6, 2003 I'm sure there could be others, but the one, single dealbreaker for me in all aspects of life: Don't lie to me.
EnigmaXOXO Posted November 7, 2003 Posted November 7, 2003 when do problems cross over into dysfunction? When another person's behavior directly effects the quality of my own life. how much can you handle? Not nearly as much as I use to! The deal breakers for me are: dishonesty, history of chemical and/or physical abuse, STDs and infidelity.
Author jenny Posted November 7, 2003 Author Posted November 7, 2003 i don't think i can handle very much. in friends, i can handle most serious stuff, but when it comes to bfs, i'm a bit skittish. i agree with most listed above, and i would add sense of humour and expressiveness. and i like the concept of dysfunction as when it begins to effect one's own life directly! mk, thanks all!
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