asireen Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Hard to find a really good man these days. Equally difficult to find a good woman. Or even a 'normal' one.
Mr. Lucky Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 Where the hell are you meeting these guys? LOL Said in jest, but probably at least part of the answer. OP, how did you meet your last 3 BF's ??? Mr. Lucky
Author moo Posted July 15, 2009 Author Posted July 15, 2009 Yes, I am in therapy working on myself. I do resent being called damaged though. I think that is unfair, but I am working on myself via therapy, self help books, self help websites and more to help myself. I don't believe we attrack one type of men. I believe we attrack different types of men but as we get to know them, it is up to us to decide whether or not to keep dating them when they prove to be unworthy. I don't believe in "having the whole cake" as no one is perfect...but I know now, go much more slowly and if they prove to be unworthy, to drop them before I get closer to them. Yes, the fault does lie with me.
redtail Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 ... Yes, the fault does lie with me. This is wise in my opinion Moo. Taking responsibility gives one the power to make changes, rather than trying to change others. There is one common denominator in all your relationships, you. You can be the kind of person that appreciates and looks for the good in others and still maintains her boundaries. Good luck to you.
LakesideDream Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 After reading this thread, I have a head ache. I'm sure there are good people "out there" .... "somewhere". Anybody have directions to either place?
BlackWhite Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 After reading this thread, I have a head ache. I'm sure there are good people "out there" .... "somewhere". Anybody have directions to either place? Well, I think you used to be good before your cheating.
Heroic Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 Do you want to know why there are no nice guys out there.....Because when we tried being nice you wouldn't notice us. My mother raised me to be a gentleman and I couldn't get a date to save my life. The day I started treating women like I could care less I had more than my share to choose from.
LakesideDream Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 Well, I think you used to be good before your cheating. Cheating? Who did I ever cheat on? I had a GF who was married, does that make ME a cheater? Definitions are so distracting.
silktricks Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 Cheating? Who did I ever cheat on? I had a GF who was married, does that make ME a cheater? yup - it do.
LakesideDream Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 OK, I don't make the rules so I'll take the responsibility. For the OP's original question. Depending on age of course. The "normal ones" by definition are not attracted to the "abby normal" ones. I can tell you that in my case I get a sense right away when someone is dragging around more baggage than I want to share, or has attitudes that counter mine in a dinner date or two. As lonely as I can be, or sad, or even horny, beginning a relationship with little or no chance of success is not possible for me. If there's no light at the end of the tunnel, I don't explore.
2sure Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 Moo. Myself and many people have asked the same question. You keep having basically the same relationship over and over again, just with different people. The only consistent factor is you. People make mistakes. We are supposed to learn from them. Some lessons are harder than others and require making the same mistake a couple of times. But when we make the same mistake more than a couple of times.... Its no longer a mistake, Its a Decision.
Heroic Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 The only consistent factor is you. But when we make the same mistake more than a couple of times.... Its no longer a mistake, Its a Decision. DING! Give the lady a prize!
BlackWhite Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 As lonely as I can be, or sad, or even horny. I thought you said you're old, fat, and saggy. And, now, add horny?
Athena Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 I thought you said you're old, fat, and saggy. And, now, add horny? You sure seem obsessed with anything to do with sex! Why is this? Do you have sexual problems?
Woggle Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 They do exist but they are the men you dumped to go find yourself and chase after some scumbag.
giotto Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 How's your wife doing? in general, or are you referring to my "troubles"?
BlackWhite Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 in general, or are you referring to my "troubles"? I am referring to your "troubles" and how you almost walked away from your marriage.
hopesndreams Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 I am referring to your "troubles" and how you almost walked away from your marriage. Sooooo, the question was what? Oh yeah, are there any good men out there. I would like to think that there are and when I go on the "market" I will find one. I have a good judge of character and would stay away from those men that are rude, smelly and dumb.
BlackWhite Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 Sooooo, the question was what? Oh yeah, are there any good men out there. I would like to think that there are and when I go on the "market" I will find one. I have a good judge of character and would stay away from those men that are rude, smelly and dumb. Those are not the most important characteristics you should stay away from. The most important ones are unfaithfulness, temper, and any type of addiction issues.
hopesndreams Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 Those are good criteria as well Black. But, to me, those 3 things I mentioned they will have to not be and then I would move onto other things. In other words, I wouldn't waste a second of my time getting "to know" and having a possible relationship with someone that smells.
BlackWhite Posted July 19, 2009 Posted July 19, 2009 Those are good criteria as well Black. But, to me, those 3 things I mentioned they will have to not be and then I would move onto other things. In other words, I wouldn't waste a second of my time getting "to know" and having a possible relationship with someone that smells. Your list is more of an outer appearance that can be "fixed" much more easily than say someone who has an anger issue or an attendancy to be a player or addcition to alcohol.
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