nicklove Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 We have been broken up for 9 MONTHS now, a long time, I know right? ... but today I just completely broke down again. I was extremely depressed when we first broke up, I couldn't eat or sleep, my happiness was completely lost. Just like I read, time made it easier and easier to cope. We remained friends and would still share time together by eating, movies and even museums, with no shacking up. So today when I was invited to his sisters baby shower I thought of it as a kind gesture reflecting I'm still in the picture. I was so excited to partake in the party-games, and I even bought presents for him to give to his sister, but not even 10 minutes had gone by that I was there that I did not notice marks on his neck. The thought of some girl kissing and sucking on my man drove me absolutely mad. (I know he is not mine anymore but ...I know I'm stupid and lame sometimes) My heart felt like it was literally shattered into a million pieces again, I couldn't breathe, I just felt my face drop, and could taste nothing but the flavor of disgust. I have no one to blame but myself for being so hurt, I have not released the idea of us getting back together. I have no reason to expect anything from him. We are only human I know he's an attractive single guy and life moves on after relationships but come on, disrespect me in front of your family and try to lie to me. I can't stop crying, I wish I didn't care. There is no reason for him to be back in my life. I couldn't even say good-bye to anyone, I was so embarassed and ashamed ... I never thought in a million years I was going to get hurt today. WTF did I do to deserve this. He has the nerve to tell me that it hurts him for me to fill this way. He saids he likes me for who I am, well that person that he knew is no longer here. I will embrace this learning experience and never be played as a fool ever again! or at least try my hardest. This really sucks, I was SO happy before all this uneccesary bull-crap. Oh well I'm done sinking and sulking, thanks for listening... Good Night, can't wait for a new fresh day!
SpanksTheMonkey Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Um I'm sorry but he did nothing wrong! long as its very clear you guys are broken up hes a free man! OK granted maybe he should have been more considerate and wore a turtle neck or covered it up some how. But then again hes a guy and consideration isn't always a high priority for allot of them. Look the bottom line is you need to stop hanging out with him its only hurting you but there was no bull crap on his end that I can see sorry.
Author nicklove Posted July 12, 2009 Author Posted July 12, 2009 I know, you are so right .... thanks for your reply!!
Lucky_One Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 It sounds like you are really way too hopeful that he is going to look at you and realize that you are the perfect girl for him, and that the baby shower just confirmed for you that even his family wants you two together. And the in-your-face realization that he is seeing other girls intimately has shattered that. I would think that maybe getting away from him and going NC would be the best thing for you. You are never going to heal from this if you maintain this false hope constantly, and your self esteem is going to start suffering as you continue to act like the "perfect woman" but he still rejects you. I suspect he thought you were fine with the break-up (and why wouldn't he have thought that - that is how you acted), and was genuinely surprised at your reaction and sorry that he hurt you, because he had no idea that it would bother you. You don't want to be friends with him - you want to be his GF. The two just don't go together well.
Andreas Posted July 13, 2009 Posted July 13, 2009 You don't want to be friends with him - you want to be his GF. The two just don't go together well. Same for people still being friends but wanting to be boyfriends, I've been away from my ex for a year now but still friends, and I wish to god that I hadn't left her in my life, not because she's cruel or anything, she's actually very kind but because every time she mentions her new man James I'm sat there with a plastic grin on my face and eyes running from a sudden 'hayfever' attack (yes, even in January, ahem, magic hayfever. ). It's a never ending problem, I've stayed 'best' friends with 3 ex's now and I have learned the hard way, they always will come back, tell you all their problems, make you cry uncontrollably when they leave again then a year or two down the line forget you exist as they have someone else (this is happening with the 3rd so I'm just from today not returning calls or anything anymore) I do wonder if letting them stay in your life is more disrespecting yourself than anything else...
Recommended Posts