wontgohomewou Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Last night I met a very cute girl, amazing personality and very pretty. We hit it off big time, at least I think we did. Both were completely sober, both were very responsive to touches, a whole lot of flirting. By the end of the night she even rested her head on my shoulders. I really just want to know.. what now? How much contact should I keep with her without her thinking 'this is too much'. I did talk to her on facebook before this encounter, and she was just very responsive to everything. Bummer is that I won't be seeing her again until August 22. Man I've been out of the game for so long that I'm actually kind of nervous.. what a change ... help me friends!
RA1 Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 So you won't be seeing each other for another 5 weeks. That leaves phone, text, email, instant messenger as means of contact. I would send her some kind of message in the next couple of days and see how she responds. If she seems chatty, I would leave it another couple days and then send a reply. If she is not so chatty, i would leave a longer gap. Play it by ear. You should be able to gage from her replies whether she welcomes contact.
analyzetheworld Posted July 13, 2009 Posted July 13, 2009 Yeah, definitely don't overdo it. Be the thing that she looks for. What I mean, is, be that thing in her life that she wonders about, gives all her attention and focus to. How do you do that? Make her wonder if you're going to call, text, etc. that day. The more she thinks about you on her own, the more she'll welcome your call and take the time to talk to you. I would say that you should keep your contact to 1-2 times per week, but you're going to have to do something those few times that will make her remember you, otherwise, it won't be enough contact to keep her interested, and she'll find attention elsewhere. It's a fine line. Try to emotionally connect deeply with her each time you call her, and don't just chit-chat....but if you do this too often, she'll begin to take you for granted, so limit it. Good luck, and let us know how it works out. I'm curious to know.
Author wontgohomewou Posted July 14, 2009 Author Posted July 14, 2009 Yeah, definitely don't overdo it. Be the thing that she looks for. What I mean, is, be that thing in her life that she wonders about, gives all her attention and focus to. How do you do that? Make her wonder if you're going to call, text, etc. that day. The more she thinks about you on her own, the more she'll welcome your call and take the time to talk to you. I would say that you should keep your contact to 1-2 times per week, but you're going to have to do something those few times that will make her remember you, otherwise, it won't be enough contact to keep her interested, and she'll find attention elsewhere. It's a fine line. Try to emotionally connect deeply with her each time you call her, and don't just chit-chat....but if you do this too often, she'll begin to take you for granted, so limit it. Good luck, and let us know how it works out. I'm curious to know. Like this idea. I texted her for the past two days and now I'm just going to stop for the next 5. If she texts me I'm just going to give a simple reply and text in 5 days saying 'whats up' or something... ahh gotta love the game
Bayern Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Like this idea. I texted her for the past two days and now I'm just going to stop for the next 5. If she texts me I'm just going to give a simple reply and text in 5 days saying 'whats up' or something... ahh gotta love the game I hate the game. It seems like guys lose this game more often than not.
Author wontgohomewou Posted July 15, 2009 Author Posted July 15, 2009 I hate the game. It seems like guys lose this game more often than not. ik! I didnt get any texts for a whole day .. wtf! I really like her too lol... I feel like calling quits now
imakemistakes Posted July 15, 2009 Posted July 15, 2009 ik! I didnt get any texts for a whole day .. wtf! I really like her too lol... I feel like calling quits now She doesn't like you. Sorry.
analyzetheworld Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 I hate the game. It seems like guys lose this game more often than not. True, but it is the nature of things. As long as there are other men that find the same girl attractive that you do, there will be these "games". To a certain degree, you have to play, but I don't think you ever have to compromise your dignity. You choose how much you'll play....then all of a sudden, you might just meet a girl who thinks you're the best thing since sliced bread (once she really gets to know you). So, it's worth it, it's a numbers game mostly, like it or not.
analyzetheworld Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 ik! I didnt get any texts for a whole day .. wtf! I really like her too lol... I feel like calling quits now If I were you, I'd just keep on living your life. Find some hobby you really enjoy, and get your mind off her. Go out with friends. Go to a bar and talk to some people - don't try to meet anyone, just go and talk to people. You'll be amazed at how much less significant your problems seem when you have an active social life going on. Then, later, if she calls, then great; but if not, oh well, cause you're out meeting other people anyway.
Author wontgohomewou Posted July 16, 2009 Author Posted July 16, 2009 If I were you, I'd just keep on living your life. Find some hobby you really enjoy, and get your mind off her. Go out with friends. Go to a bar and talk to some people - don't try to meet anyone, just go and talk to people. You'll be amazed at how much less significant your problems seem when you have an active social life going on. Then, later, if she calls, then great; but if not, oh well, cause you're out meeting other people anyway. Very good advice. Will definitely consider in the future, but for now I got the text I wanted . It said "I'm bored!"... after getting this text I can tell that she is DEFINITELY interested. No doubts anymore.
WhyYesThankYou Posted July 16, 2009 Posted July 16, 2009 everything said in posts above As much as I hate the game, one of the rules is that it goes on anyway. Given that, what analyzetheworld has said is the way I like guys to play. Well said.
Author wontgohomewou Posted July 17, 2009 Author Posted July 17, 2009 So guys, found out she likes me last night! This is great!! I don't even think about my ex anymore !!
analyzetheworld Posted July 18, 2009 Posted July 18, 2009 So guys, found out she likes me last night! This is great!! I don't even think about my ex anymore !! That's great man. Wish you the best.
m-j Posted July 18, 2009 Posted July 18, 2009 girls rule the game until they're "caught" and then its over.
pwnstigator Posted July 18, 2009 Posted July 18, 2009 girls rule the game until they're "caught" and then its over. I think girls play the game largely because they don't want it to be played against them. If you're placing unnecessary intervals between contact, pretending to be more busy than you actually are, et cetera, you pre-empt the other person from doing this to you. Women are terrified of the narcissists who would do this sort of thing. The problem is that, when you do battle with monsters, you risk becoming one. Also, most men aren't monsters.
carhill Posted July 18, 2009 Posted July 18, 2009 By the end of the night she even rested her head on my shoulders.Seal the interest. Good girl. So guys, found out she likes me last night!Power-adder. Few words, maximum effect. OP, at the risk of causing you to lose your helium, you just met her. If there's 'something' there, five weeks is bupkus. If, as I surmise, she's trolling, then in five weeks she won't know your name. Regardless, you're still having dreams about your ex. Think about this.... would you want this beautiful girl (I'm assuming you're both pretty young) to become your way of forgetting your ex? Well, ponder that for the next five weeks and check back with us.
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