trc922 Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Ok, so i'm stuck in a situation and have no clue what to do or how to go about doing it, so any help would be GREATLY appreciated. I have been dating a cop who lives with me for about a year and a half. He is a bit on the controlling side (what I wear, where I go, what i'm doing, wanting my passwords to accounts, etc.) I recently discovered his password for myspace and found an email he sent to a girl giving her his cell phone number which is not the cell phone number i have, or his male friends for that matter. I also double checked all the picture messages he has sent me which showed him shirtless and trying to show off his muscles, which if i go into the detail part of the message gives me the other numbers he has sent the pic to, and on the half naked pics of himself he has also sent it to this other cell phone. I just got a "spoof account" and called the cell number which conveniently has no recorded name on the voicemail. I so badly want to get my hands on this cell phone to see all the texts and so forth, but am not sure where he has it, it could be in his truck, in his police car, or locker at work. I just want solid concreate proof before i say anything. Does anybody have any ideas or advice??
sally4sara Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Ok, so i'm stuck in a situation and have no clue what to do or how to go about doing it, so any help would be GREATLY appreciated. I have been dating a cop who lives with me for about a year and a half. He is a bit on the controlling side (what I wear, where I go, what i'm doing, wanting my passwords to accounts, etc.) I recently discovered his password for myspace and found an email he sent to a girl giving her his cell phone number which is not the cell phone number i have, or his male friends for that matter. I also double checked all the picture messages he has sent me which showed him shirtless and trying to show off his muscles, which if i go into the detail part of the message gives me the other numbers he has sent the pic to, and on the half naked pics of himself he has also sent it to this other cell phone. I just got a "spoof account" and called the cell number which conveniently has no recorded name on the voicemail. I so badly want to get my hands on this cell phone to see all the texts and so forth, but am not sure where he has it, it could be in his truck, in his police car, or locker at work. I just want solid concreate proof before i say anything. Does anybody have any ideas or advice?? Holding you to standards waaaayyyy higher than he holds himself to? He sounds awesome! I think I'd just tell him to move out and let whoever he gave the secret cell number to take him off your hands. Is it really worth it to get solid proof? Save yourself the headache and tell him to walk. Then you can go back to making decisions for yourself again. Wear what you want. Go where you want. Do what you want. All without someone nosing in your business.... Ask yourself one thing. Did you snoop on people in your life before this relationship? Or did you start thinking to snoop after being in a relationship with someone who insists on invading your privacy? This is a toxic situation. Don't wait around for proof of what you already know.
TroyNJ Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 I have some very simple advice RUN don't walk, RUn away.
Lucky_One Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Well, if he does have a keylogger on, then you are busted on knowing about the cell phone. Run some utilities to search for one. Here is a good one, easy to run, quick, and it is free. Kim Komando is a safe site, and she always suggests top notch programs. http://www.komando.com/downloads/category.aspx?id=420
MichelleS1983 Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 I hate to tell you, but cops are some of the biggest whores on the planet. Every cop I've EVER KNOWN (and I've known alot of them due to being involved with the town Rescue/EMT Squad for over 25 years) was a cheating, lying loser and I'd NEVER, EVER date one. ALOT of these idiots have a God complex and think they're above the rest of the human race - that the simple rules of life that we all have to follow don't apply to them. I wasn't surprised in the LEAST with your story about what a sneak he is. In fact, the minute I read the word "cop" in your post, I knew what was coming and you didn't disappoint me. More than likely, Cassanova has a Trac Phone or a pay-as-you-go phone so his "extra-curricular" activities aren't recorded on his normal cell phone bill. This is standard practice for alot of cheating sneaks. As someone else said, you already SAW that he's sneaking messages with his secret cell phone number to women on MySpace and he's sent his lame, half-naked pictures to you as well as his secret cell (what a tool this jerk is) - so why do you need a smoking gun? I understand your desire to see this secret phone but REALLY, all the proof is staring you right in the face. You have all you need to know. Set this jerk free and let him go victimize someone else. I can guarantee you - it won't be me. LOL. Cops suck.
Thornton Posted July 13, 2009 Posted July 13, 2009 Can you not keep calling his secret cell phone from another number that he won't recognise as being yours, and wait for it to ring or vibrate? You would probably hear it if it was somewhere in the house or in the car etc. Call it while he's at work - if he answers he obviously has it at work somewhere. The background noises when he answers might help you to track down the location. Although, tbh, the existing evidence would be enough for a confrontation I think. You know he has a secret cell phone number that he gives to girls, and that he's controlling and dishonest. Reason enough for breaking up I think, even without finding the cell phone itself...
Enema Posted July 13, 2009 Posted July 13, 2009 Why are you even bothering with detective work to try and catch him? 1) He's too controlling 2) You don't trust him This relationship is already over. Smell the coffee.
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