ithinkilikehim Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 What does it mean when a guy says does it matter? --My b/f is out of town right now and we were talking not to long ago and I asked him a simple question and he responded does it matter. I found it odd since he has always told me everything. I could actually careless at the fact he didnt want to tell me. I just want to know why guys say does it matter and what is means comming from a guy. Thanks!
kizik Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 It means, "I am a complete douchebag. You are stupid for staying with me."
Thaddeus Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 Oh oh. This could be a symptom of trouble to come. I will admit that I've used that line in the past. Usually the context is something like, "Do you like this skirt?" and I may have responded, "Does it matter what I think?" While I don't know the specifics of your situation, in my own personal case it was when I was asked something by milady, I gave her my opinion, then she'd go on and on and on about how my opinion was wrong. Well, us guys are trainable. Do that often enough and we'll just stop offering our opinions because we don't want to be told how wrong we are. Ask yourself this: When you ask his opinion about something and it happens to disagree with your opinion, do you respect his opinion for what it is and not try to argue the point or try to change his mind? Or are you eager to point out his faulty logic and tell him that he's wrong? (I'll admit that I sometimes do this as well - that is, ask for an opinion and if the opinion is different than my own I may do the completely wrong thing and try to change their mind. Hey, I'm not perfect either, but I'm getting better every day.)
Author ithinkilikehim Posted July 11, 2009 Author Posted July 11, 2009 Oh oh. This could be a symptom of trouble to come. I will admit that I've used that line in the past. Usually the context is something like, "Do you like this skirt?" and I may have responded, "Does it matter what I think?" While I don't know the specifics of your situation, in my own personal case it was when I was asked something by milady, I gave her my opinion, then she'd go on and on and on about how my opinion was wrong. Well, us guys are trainable. Do that often enough and we'll just stop offering our opinions because we don't want to be told how wrong we are. Ask yourself this: When you ask his opinion about something and it happens to disagree with your opinion, do you respect his opinion for what it is and not try to argue the point or try to change his mind? Or are you eager to point out his faulty logic and tell him that he's wrong? (I'll admit that I sometimes do this as well - that is, ask for an opinion and if the opinion is different than my own I may do the completely wrong thing and try to change their mind. Hey, I'm not perfect either, but I'm getting better every day.) Thanks, I have never told him I didnt like his opinion or that he was wrong. It was a simple question, what do you have planned for today? I got the response does it matter. I know Im probably over analyzing this, I just thought it was weird.
Thaddeus Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 It was a simple question, what do you have planned for today? I got the response does it matter. OK, that helps because it creates some context. How did he sound when he said it? Resigned? Defeated? Or just tired? Obviously, only he knows what's going on inside his head, but it sounds as if he's stressed about something. It's sounding like he's sort of throwing up his hands as if to say, "It doesn't matter WHAT I do, it all goes to hell anyway." Now it might be me over-analyzing it, but it's awfully hard to tell what he means without actually hearing his voice when he says it. Sorry I couldn't be more help. I really don't know.
Author ithinkilikehim Posted July 11, 2009 Author Posted July 11, 2009 OK, that helps because it creates some context. How did he sound when he said it? Resigned? Defeated? Or just tired? Obviously, only he knows what's going on inside his head, but it sounds as if he's stressed about something. It's sounding like he's sort of throwing up his hands as if to say, "It doesn't matter WHAT I do, it all goes to hell anyway." Now it might be me over-analyzing it, but it's awfully hard to tell what he means without actually hearing his voice when he says it. Sorry I couldn't be more help. I really don't know. No you have been really helpful and I appreciate it. He seemed fine throughout the entitre convo except when I asked him it. And he called me I didnt call him so its not like I interupted him doing something. He sounded kind of annoyed when I asked it. I never ask him what his palns are cause I could careless what he does. I only asked becuase the past few days he seemed to be having a lot of fun so I just wanted to know if he had plans for the day so that I wouldnt bother him later on... Oh well...
Lucky_One Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Way back when, when I was in an affair with this married guy, he used to pre-empt his wife's phone calls by calling her first, and then that way she was less likely to call him when he was with me. And he would get irritated by her casual questions about his schedule, because he knew that his actual schedule wasn't what she would be expecting to hear. So - how long is he out of town for, and exactly how much fun has he been having and with whom, and how long has you been dating and how serious are you?
Author ithinkilikehim Posted July 12, 2009 Author Posted July 12, 2009 Way back when, when I was in an affair with this married guy, he used to pre-empt his wife's phone calls by calling her first, and then that way she was less likely to call him when he was with me. And he would get irritated by her casual questions about his schedule, because he knew that his actual schedule wasn't what she would be expecting to hear. So - how long is he out of town for, and exactly how much fun has he been having and with whom, and how long has you been dating and how serious are you? He flew out on the 6th or 7th of this month and he comes back the 20th. He went to go see his family since he has not seen them in come years and his cousin was getting married. He has been with his family the entire time. He doesnt have friends up there. We have been dating for about a year and a half...
Lucky_One Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 Gotcha. In that case, I am not sure why he said "does it matter?" Maybe he just was in front of a cousin that he wanted to impress by being a manly, flippant, stud?
Author ithinkilikehim Posted July 12, 2009 Author Posted July 12, 2009 Gotcha. In that case, I am not sure why he said "does it matter?" Maybe he just was in front of a cousin that he wanted to impress by being a manly, flippant, stud? Haha, maybe. I thought he said something about sitting outside on a swing but I could be wrong. I maybe thinking of another convo we had...
boogieboy Posted July 12, 2009 Posted July 12, 2009 You might have asked him in a tone that he thought was accusing. Or he just doesnt want to tell you his business, which I dont know why he would want to do that after a year and a half. I hope for your sake that hes just stressed over there, but hearing your voice should unstress him. Something had to happen betwen you two for him to be on guard like that.
Author ithinkilikehim Posted July 12, 2009 Author Posted July 12, 2009 You might have asked him in a tone that he thought was accusing. Or he just doesnt want to tell you his business, which I dont know why he would want to do that after a year and a half. I hope for your sake that hes just stressed over there, but hearing your voice should unstress him. Something had to happen betwen you two for him to be on guard like that. If something happened between us, I wasnt aware of it. I didnt think I was sounding accusing but I may have been. The rest of the convo went pretty smooth after that. Maybe he was just in a bad mood for the moment...
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