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I think my new lover is a liar!!!

Lizzie60

By Lizzie60
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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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exactly what other clues to you need L60?

 

 

I know.. I feel so dumb.. and that's what makes me mad.. but I just want to have a proof...

Art_Critic Established Member

Art_Critic

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Is he a client ?

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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Did you say how long you have been with him?

 

Have you tried looking for him on MySpace or Facebook? Googled his name for possible info? Don't know about Canada but if he owns his own home that might be available to you by 'public record'. You could follow the guy home one night or have someone else do it. Seems extreme but whatever will get you answers I suppose.

 

He really should be forthcoming with his home address, and if not or if he gives you another falsified # then that should be very telling.

 

No.. I honestly doubt he even use a computer.. but I could be wrong..

2sunny Established Member

2sunny

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what does it matter? seriously...

 

except that you don't want a liar hanging around... if things don't add up - just dump him, the wondering isn't worth the mental energy spent no matter how good the sex is.

 

your intuition is always right Lizzie - go with your gut on this one.

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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what does it matter? seriously...

 

except that you don't want a liar hanging around... if things don't add up - just dump him, the wondering isn't worth the mental energy spent no matter how good the sex is.

 

your intuition is always right Lizzie - go with your gut on this one.

 

 

My intention is to dump him.. (if there is no sex, he won't stick around very long ;)) I will ask him for his driver's licence Monday (if I see him).. then I will tell him to F*off..

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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Bottom line.. whether he's married or not is not really the question.. he's just unavailable..

 

Thing is I just want to know if he's unavailable because he's married or if he's unavailable just because he's a workholic.. (like he said he is)...

 

I just want to get to the bottom of this.. out of curiosity.. :o

espec10001 Established Member

espec10001

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From a guys perspective:

 

He already got his jollies with you, so what more is he gonna want? Did you get any sort of compensation for this sex? I'm not saying prostitution, but at least charge him something for it like a smart businesswoman, don't give it to him for free.

boldjack Established Member

boldjack

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Comeon Liz. it's not as if you haven't lied or gaslighted all of your MM's. The only difference is that it's happening to you. Why should you be entitled to the truth , when you have no intention of giving it, yourself?

Island Girl Established Member

Island Girl

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Cheaters are always lying to somebody.

 

I don't understand why you think the person being lied to should never be you or why you take offense to it when you have continued in participating in lies to others.

 

And I believe you knowingly would again, right?

 

Oh the surprise when the chicken come home to roost!! :rolleyes:

Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

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I know.. but in my case, I don't want a liar.. I don't really care if he lies to someone else.. just NOT TO ME... :p

I guess now you know how the MM's wives feel.

 

No offense, Lizzie. But come on, karma is a bitch. :o

boldjack Established Member

boldjack

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Ruuuuuuuby, Don't take your love to town".:):)

Touche Established Member

Touche

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Lizzie, are you serious or are you mocking?

 

If your accounting is factual, of course he's married.

 

Why is that a problem for you?

 

Have you had a change of heart?

 

Wow, GREAT questions! (And of course she's serious...duh!)

 

I have made up my mind.. I will NOT have sex again with him until I know more ... so he will have to make a decision..

 

:lmao: Hilarious! What's wrong with this picture? Perhaps (just a crazy idea I had) you should get to know these guys BEFORE you have sex with them? I don't know...just sounds like something you should consider.

 

 

exactly what other clues to you need L60?

 

Seriously.

 

My intention is to dump him.. (if there is no sex, he won't stick around very long ;)) I will ask him for his driver's licence Monday (if I see him).. then I will tell him to F*off..

 

Wow, this is sooo low class. Sorry. You're with a man who won't stick around unless you give him sex and you have to ask for his driver's license to see if he's legit? Wow. Sounds like a real prince to me!:laugh:

 

Pretty sad.

 

Comeon Liz. it's not as if you haven't lied or gaslighted all of your MM's. The only difference is that it's happening to you. Why should you be entitled to the truth , when you have no intention of giving it, yourself?

 

Exactly.

 

Cheaters are always lying to somebody.

 

I don't understand why you think the person being lied to should never be you or why you take offense to it when you have continued in participating in lies to others.

 

And I believe you knowingly would again, right?

 

Oh the surprise when the chicken come home to roost!! :rolleyes:

 

Yep.

 

Ruuuuuuuby, Don't take your love to town".:):)

 

:lmao::lmao: Too funny!

2sunny Established Member

2sunny

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aaaand, what is the point of asking for proof? you don't need proof... your gut already told you something is terribly "off"

Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

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^ Touche, I think you are being a little rough on her. Just my opinion! Everybody has feelings.

Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

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Ruuuuuuuby, Don't take your love to town".:):)

:lmao: No way, man! I lean toward the light.

Touche Established Member

Touche

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^ Touche, I think you are being a little rough on her. Just my opinion! Everybody has feelings.

 

And you're certainly entitled to your opinion as am I. Of course everyone has feelings. So what? I can't control anyone else's. And no one should let anyone control theirs, n'est ce pas?:)

Trimmer Established Member

Trimmer

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Yes, he's probably sleeping with someone outside your relationship. I wonder if it's one of those women who's confident that by sleeping with him, she's actually helping his other relationship - you know the type... Hmm, maybe you owe her a thank you.

 

The thing is I don't want him to lie to me... all my other MMs are straight forward and do not lie to me.. they don't need to.

 

I HATE LIARS!!! :sick::mad:

 

I know.. but in my case, I don't want a liar.. I don't really care if he lies to someone else.. just NOT TO ME... :p

Yeah, because that would be a much more serious character flaw than if he were "only" lying to his wife and children.

Wow... just.... wow.

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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Comeon Liz. it's not as if you haven't lied or gaslighted all of your MM's. The only difference is that it's happening to you. Why should you be entitled to the truth , when you have no intention of giving it, yourself?

 

You hit the nail BoldJ... As I said before.. I don't want them to lie to ME. ;)

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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aaaand, what is the point of asking for proof? you don't need proof... your gut already told you something is terribly "off"

 

I know.. I don't need the proof.. I will probably not ask him for his driver's licence (for a while anyway) because I have decided that I will make myself 'unavailable'...

 

He checked every morning when I leave for work.. he's around my place, we talk.. blablabla.. when I come back from work.. he's still around checking..

 

I know this is childish.. but I will 'tease' him but he won't get anything.. :D

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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You hit the nail BoldJ... As I said before.. I don't want them to lie to ME. ;)

 

 

Oh and I should add.. that I'm probably not the only one.. I don't know many OWs who would accept if their MM were lying or 'cheating' on them.. this is no different. :p

CLC2008 Established Member

CLC2008

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So bypass any consideration towards the person and family being cheated on, so long as it's not the other man/woman.

 

Interesting.

Taramere Established Member

Taramere

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Loyalty amongst thieves is a fallacy. Nobody has immunity to being lied to, and that includes you Lizzie. It's ridiculous that in your late 50s you should still be hanging onto any delusions to the contrary.

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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Loyalty amongst thieves is a fallacy. Nobody has immunity to being lied to, and that includes you Lizzie. It's ridiculous that in your late 50s you should still be hanging onto any delusions to the contrary.

 

 

I never said that I had immunity against liars.. :rolleyes:

Taramere Established Member

Taramere

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I never said that I had immunity against liars.. :rolleyes:

 

But you seem pretty shocked/surprised by the notion of a MM lying to you even when he's quite clearly lying to other people. That suggests that it's difficult for you to comprehend that a married man would lie to you as well as to his wife. Why wouldn't he? When someone lies, it's a statement about who they are rather than being any kind of reflection on the person they're lying to.

 

Playing detective and trying to get to the bottom of it seems like a bit of a waste of time. What will it really achieve to prove that the guy's been lying? Probably better to just shrug this one off as not being one of your finer moments, and if he asks to see you again tell him that he's outlived his purpose in your life.

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Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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But you seem pretty shocked/surprised by the notion of a MM lying to you even when he's quite clearly lying to other people. That suggests that it's difficult for you to comprehend that a married man would lie to you as well as to his wife. Why wouldn't he? When someone lies, it's a statement about who they are rather than being any kind of reflection on the person they're lying to.

 

Playing detective and trying to get to the bottom of it seems like a bit of a waste of time. What will it really achieve to prove that the guy's been lying? Probably better to just shrug this one off as not being one of your finer moments, and if he asks to see you again tell him that he's outlived his purpose in your life.

 

 

I'm not surprised.. nothing surprises me anymore.. I'm more 'pissed' at the guy.. cause each time I try to find more about him.. I find more of what seems to be 'lies" .. and it really pisses me off. :mad:

 

My other MMs.. are straightforward.. there is no lies.. why would they? But with this one.. it started as a 'possibility' of a 'relationship"...

While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!
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