ExiledLyCan Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 I've been going out with my girlfriend for about a month now, there quite some stuff that she does or say thats giving me mixed signals. She is currently 16 and im 19. Her parents arent too happy about our relastionship but has allowed it. Her parents are also the type to alawys push her to try her hardest, making her study and rack a huge amount of extra activities and programs outside of school to prepare her for the future. The first time she tried holding my hand i remember noticing her hesitate and eying my hands every one in a while, until i made the first move and grabbed her hand. Ever since than she has been used to it and would go for my hand first when we are together. She would also often feed me and prefer to share meals than get our own separate meals. When we are together she often lays on my shoulders if we are sitting and gives me hugs, and is pretty physical now. We are often together for only a little time(1-2hours) at once but multiple times through the week(2-4). She has also given me her password for personal accounts like facebook. However, about 2 weeks into our relationship she said stuff like "i think we should see each other a little less so we dont get tired of each other" "also we should have some more alone time to ourselves to catch up with our friends" During those days she would usually always call me at night though. Recently whenever i try calling her she would have to go after a while, while we used to have long talks over the phone. She also doesnt call my regularly at night anymore and when i make the calls to her she always says stuff like "my parents are coming" or " i should get some sleep" after like 5-10minutes. Recently she said stuff like "I have so much more people to hang out with now, and when I cant I always have you", earlier we were talking on aim and her computer died on her, when i ask her about it a bit after she said "i was about to call you and tell u but than i got tired and didnt", when she says stuff like this it just hurts/pisses me off as it makes me feel like im not worth taking the extra time for, am i overreacting? Am i overreacting to her actions and words, and from your point of view does she really have feelings for me or am i just wasting my time? I'm only 19 but im done with companion relationships and want to settle down and get into a deep relationship. Is her age a factor in my problem as well?If more info is needed let me know and if anyone has advice on how to approach this issue please let me know. thanks in advance for the advice
RA1 Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 It could be that her feelings for you are cooling. Alternatively she may have decided she's too young to get serious about anyone yet. Probably that's what her parents are saying to her and, if so, she have accepted their advice.
poman2125 Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 probably not what you want to hear, but i would agree with the previous post. girls at that age tend to be pretty fickle, because there are a lot of changes happening in their lives. she was afraid of taking the first step to hold her hand...maybe she's afraid of taking the initiative to have a serious talk with you.
analyzetheworld Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 I think one of two things are going on: 1. She is feeling smothered by you for some reason 2. She is interested in someone else at the moment, and doesn't want to hurt you, so she is passive about it. Your best reaction, no matter which it is, is to back off. If she's feeling smothered, then your backing off will cause her to want you again. If she's found someone else, then your backing off will allow you to be able to get on with your life and stop obsessing over her so much. Find a hobby you like, and spend some time doing that instead of talking to her on AIM or on the phone. When you realize that women are not the most important thing, a lot more women will want to be around you. Good luck.
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