cyril's fan Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I've been wondering about this though I know it doesn't help dwelling. But I'm just curious after reading some threads about people contacting people after a breakup and wonder if my case is an anomaly. All my breakups have been really clean. There has never been a time when either party contacts each other again after some time to either try to get back together or just want to be friends. I don't really believe in being friends after a relationship so I've always gone NC. Why I do that, I understand. Why my exes do that, I don't quite. I don't know whether it just shows they didn't love me enough or they also didn't believe in friends after relationships or they could see my determination in not resuming contact so they just decided that there wasn't much point in them trying to contact me or they understand that it's easier for one to get over the heartache without contact and decide to not cause more hurt. In general, what do you guys think? And if you went NC with an ex, what was your reason? And if your exes went NC, did you ever find out the reason and if so, what was it?
Author cyril's fan Posted July 10, 2009 Author Posted July 10, 2009 Anyone has any insights on this topic? Appreciate any.
analyzetheworld Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 I'm guessing NC stands for no contact. I think it's really just about everyone being an individual. It's been proven that we date and hang out with people that are similar to ourselves (it feels more comfortable to us), so if you don't like staying in contact with your ex's, it's a good bet that you probably have dated people that feel the same way (for the same reason as yours, or possibly different ones). My own take on this whole thing is that if you never do anything to hurt the other person (besides breaking up with them) - meaning you behave with dignity and are concerned for them, then even though the two of you broke up, there would be nothing to keep you from being friends eventually. When someone has gotten to know you so well, it's nice to keep them around, as they really can be a source of encouragement and keep you on the right road. However, if you pissed them off (like in the example of a guy getting a girl pregnant, and then leaving her), then of course that won't work. So, treat others with respect, and you probably could be friends after a breakup, is my philosophy.
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