Isolde Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Okay, so I hardly ever get approached, but when I do, it's always a) in an inherently awkward location/time, where I'm afraid to sound rude but also can't/don't want to talk, and b) someone that I'm not attracted to in the least. Don't get me wrong, I always find it somewhat flattering to be approached, but it ALWAYS falls under those two descriptions. I was just wondering if anyone had a similar issue.
BobSacamento Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I sometimes see women I'm interested in at awkward times. Like today I was on line at the bagel joint I usually go to. I was in line behind a pretty cute woman. I could tell she was checking me out and was fidgeting with her hair and clothes. But I didn't do anything because I love that place. If I did something and made a fool of myself I could never go back there. It's weird because one of the reasons I like going there is because there's always hot chicks. What the hell is wrong with me lol.
boogieboy Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Ive been apraoched in awkward situations, and I always realize I cant shun them because the situation is awkward, I could be passing up a good opportunity. You can pass up guys that you dont find attractive all day, but dont shove away one time opportunities at good men when they approach just because you find it awkward.
IrishCarBomb Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Ugh, I know what you mean. I will be out buying clothes or shoes or something and I'm just browsing around, minding my own business when... BAM!!!... outta nowhere this girl comes up and says: "Hi! Can I help you find something?" I get all embarrassed for her, because "hey lady, I'm clothes shopping here and in no place to have to fend you off!" Of course there's like this huge, drawn out, awkward moment where we just look at each other with disgust. But eventually she turns and walks away. Thank god. Score one for me. Then, after I've walked around for a while and seen some stuff, you wouldn't even believe it... She's totally back! And do you know what she says to me?!?!? "Can I help you find anything?" At this point I'm like WTF OMG WTF!! LOL!!! Hold your horses woman! I'm clearly not interested in you, so please just back off!! Some girls must be pretty desperate!!! OMFG LOL!!!
Author Isolde Posted July 9, 2009 Author Posted July 9, 2009 I mean, I would definitely talk to just about anyone in a bar, or a bookstore, or a cafe--for at least a couple minutes--don't get the wrong idea. I am not cold. As I said, though, I exclusively get approached in weird situations where I'm caught off guard. It's illogical to assume that any guy I'm not attracted to is automatically a "good" guy. Yet another one that thinks all women want Brad Pitt, but should date Shrek, when the reality is somewhere in between (ok, maybe closer to Brad!) is attractive.
IrishCarBomb Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Yet another one that thinks all women want Brad Pitt You mean to tell me I got the "Brad Pitt 100% Exact Replica" plastic surgery package for NOTHING!?!?!
Author Isolde Posted July 9, 2009 Author Posted July 9, 2009 You mean to tell me I got the "Brad Pitt 100% Exact Replica" plastic surgery package for NOTHING!?!?! It's okay. We'll get past the superficial level, baby. Also, you're Irish and by your admission somewhat geeky, so you're like a well-read Brad Pitt with an accent, which is kinda hot. Personality makes up for a lot!
IrishCarBomb Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Personality makes up for a lot! Sweet. Where can I get a plastic surgery that gives me some personality? Hmmm... maybe I should see if Brangäne has some kind of potion for it.
Star Gazer Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Ugh, I know what you mean. I will be out buying clothes or shoes or something and I'm just browsing around, minding my own business when... BAM!!!... outta nowhere this girl comes up and says: "Hi! Can I help you find something?" I get all embarrassed for her, because "hey lady, I'm clothes shopping here and in no place to have to fend you off!" Of course there's like this huge, drawn out, awkward moment where we just look at each other with disgust. But eventually she turns and walks away. Thank god. Score one for me. Then, after I've walked around for a while and seen some stuff, you wouldn't even believe it... She's totally back! And do you know what she says to me?!?!? "Can I help you find anything?" At this point I'm like WTF OMG WTF!! LOL!!! Hold your horses woman! I'm clearly not interested in you, so please just back off!! Some girls must be pretty desperate!!! OMFG LOL!!! :lmao:
kizik Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Isolde, I think about half the time you get approached, it'll be by guys you don't find attractive. You can take this situation into your own hands a bit, though, by talking to a cute guy first. In class, in a store, or in any situation you don't deem awkward... ask him a question or just say, "Hi." -k
boogieboy Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Isolde, I think about half the time you get approached, it'll be by guys you don't find attractive. You can take this situation into your own hands a bit, though, by talking to a cute guy first. In class, in a store, or in any situation you don't deem awkward... ask him a question or just say, "Hi." -k Kizik, you tell a woman to approach guys on this board and the first answer you get is always basically "No, way, Ill NEVER do that! Im too afraid of getting rejected!" Go ahead Isolde, say Im wrong. Can you give an example of a situation where you were caught off guardd by a guy you find attractive, and a reason you couldnt talk to him? Unless the guy followed you in the bathroom, how awkward could it be to talk to him and make light of your caught-off-guardness?
kizik Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I think that women should approach/flirt/open 25% of the time. Let the guys do the other 75%. But that's still 1/4 of the time that women should be proactive.
boogieboy Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I think that women should approach/flirt/open 25% of the time. Let the guys do the other 75%. But that's still 1/4 of the time that women should be proactive. Lets see what they say about that... Ill wager a 98% reaction of NO! Now Isolde if you change this up and say, "well all the guys that approach me arent attractive", then you have to make a concerted effort to put yourself in a place where the attractive guys are. If THEY arent approaching you that that point................
PQ13 Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Okay, so I hardly ever get approached, but when I do, it's always a) in an inherently awkward location/time, where I'm afraid to sound rude but also can't/don't want to talk, and b) someone that I'm not attracted to in the least. Don't get me wrong, I always find it somewhat flattering to be approached, but it ALWAYS falls under those two descriptions. I was just wondering if anyone had a similar issue. I guess... a) You're off-guard and come across more approachable in these situations. b) There are two types of men who can approach any woman, even if she is way out of their league, these men are either "players" or idiots. IMO an average decant guys rarely approach women who are "#9" and "#10", it seems "hot chicks" are getting hit on exclusively by "players" and idiots
Thaddeus Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Well, I've approached many #9 and #10 types. I'm no player, so I guess that makes me an idiot. Thankyewverymuch.
PQ13 Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Well, I've approached many #9 and #10 types. I'm no player, so I guess that makes me an idiot. Thankyewverymuch. Can't argue with that logic.
Kamille Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I'm having a hard time figuring out what an awkward situation would be... Times when you're in a rush to get somewhere? Times when you're hiking your bike up a flight of stairs? Times when you're at the gym? I mean, let's all remember how TBF met her fiance. Really, when cupid strikes, there is no such thing as an awkward situation.
Surfer Dude Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 I guess... a) You're off-guard and come across more approachable in these situations. b) There are two types of men who can approach any woman, even if she is way out of their league, these men are either "players" or idiots. IMO an average decant guys rarely approach women who are "#9" and "#10", it seems "hot chicks" are getting hit on exclusively by "players" and idiots IMO, there are tons of socially inept and love shy guys who wouldn't open a woman if their life depended on it. Truth be told, you can meet awesome women in public (coffee shops, street, malls etc) if you only suspend your judgment, have a positive optimistic mind and play it cool. Last time I got a phone# was... from a random chick I opened in a train. And what if I had been a negative lamer and just kept staring and thinking "oh boy, I'd love to do her, but I dare not approach!" Really, there's no such thing as rejection. She doesn't even know you, how can she possibly reject who you are? She can only reject your approach, which you can tweak as needed.
Author Isolde Posted July 9, 2009 Author Posted July 9, 2009 I'm having a hard time figuring out what an awkward situation would be... Times when you're in a rush to get somewhere? Times when you're hiking your bike up a flight of stairs? Times when you're at the gym? I mean, let's all remember how TBF met her fiance. Really, when cupid strikes, there is no such thing as an awkward situation. I think I'm talking about situations where I wouldn't know what to say even if I WAS attracted to the guy. But yeah, I guess tbh, part of the problem is that I feel I tend to be approached by guys that approach every women they see, vs. guys who actually see something of my personality and decide they might like to chat.
Jilly Bean Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 I think you must appear very approachable, which is not a bad thing, Isolde. It means you look happy, and probably have good energy. And I think that men consider everything a viable opportunity to hit on a chick.
Author Isolde Posted July 10, 2009 Author Posted July 10, 2009 I think you must appear very approachable, which is not a bad thing, Isolde. It means you look happy, and probably have good energy. And I think that men consider everything a viable opportunity to hit on a chick. Yeah, I'll try to look at it that way! :p
kizik Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 BTW, if that's you in the avatar Isolde, you have great eyes and a cute face. So don't worry.
Author Isolde Posted July 10, 2009 Author Posted July 10, 2009 OMG, that's so not me in the avatar. I wish.
kizik Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 Whatevs. You're a cutie. Don't stress it. You'll be longing for the single life later...
BobSacamento Posted July 10, 2009 Posted July 10, 2009 Ugh, I know what you mean. I will be out buying clothes or shoes or something and I'm just browsing around, minding my own business when... BAM!!!... outta nowhere this girl comes up and says: "Hi! Can I help you find something?" I get all embarrassed for her, because "hey lady, I'm clothes shopping here and in no place to have to fend you off!" Of course there's like this huge, drawn out, awkward moment where we just look at each other with disgust. But eventually she turns and walks away. Thank god. Score one for me. Then, after I've walked around for a while and seen some stuff, you wouldn't even believe it... She's totally back! And do you know what she says to me?!?!? "Can I help you find anything?" At this point I'm like WTF OMG WTF!! LOL!!! Hold your horses woman! I'm clearly not interested in you, so please just back off!! Some girls must be pretty desperate!!! OMFG LOL!!! You know what I call those people? Employees
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