aDS Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 question i have for everyone one is. my and my girl have been together for 3 years, asked her to marry me 2 years ago, she said yes and all has been good, we have also been living together for the whole 3 years, and everything is good there. no recently she has told me she has thoughts about being single, cause she has never expiernced being single before, and that she thinks that if we weren't engaged she would feel better because then the realtionship is alot less serious for her, and she feels that it will be better if we are not engaged and just together. now when i found this out i left. she called me begged me to stay and told me she loved me and wanted to be with me. what does it mean when your fiance does not want to be engaged anymore. like am i just wasting my time???? not to mention the way she trweats me has changed. im really good to her everyday, i treat her like a queen cause she is to me. no sex anymore nothing, and now this. what should i do???
2sure Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 You are/were engaged but had no plans set to marry? Is there a reason the engagement did not result in marriage? It sounds as though "engaged" meant a serious committed relationship to both of you. And that is no longer what she wants. It sounds as though she now wants a roommate. Leave. You are not her roommate. Possibky she will realize she has made a mistake, but you are going to have to leave first. The longer you remain "roommate" the less she will consider you a life partner. She wants to see other people, be single. Move on.
Teslacoil Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 She's "never been single"? Are you guys relatively young? In my experience, people do a lot of growing between their late teens and mid-twenties. (Okay that sentence seems excessively obvious). My point is that I've seen couples get engaged at 19, 20, 21. Then one person in that couple grows up a little bit. The person either graduates college, enters the workforce, or otherwise starts going through changes. The person going through the changes then realizes that the relationship is no longer serving that person's needs. One of two things happens - young couples who were fine all throughout their teens and college years suddenly split up... or the couple goes ahead and gets married too quickly, and the marriage is over within a couple of years as the partners get fed up with each other. If you're young, and being engaged simply isn't working for your relationship anymore... it's better to accept that and move on. It's probably not what you want to hear, I'm sure you guys have a long and happy history and it's always sad to see something like that end. It's better to just break up than divorce.
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