kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Is there some rule that I'm supposed to have sex with the girl on the third date? It's tonight and I'm curious what you all think. If I sound naive, it's because I haven't actually "dated" in four years.
Bejita463 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 I'd worry less about what you are supposed to do, and focus more on what feels right, were I you.
Thaddeus Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Check your manual. I think it's on page 243, paragraph 3, section 4, sub-section IV under the heading, "Nookie or not?" No, seriously, do whatever works. If you're both willing, prepared and have taken precautions, I don't see why not.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Got the condoms and all that, so I'm not worried risk-wise... and I DO like her.
sally4sara Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 There is no rule that, should she want to have sex, you must comply. But if you already know you would be down for it....follow her lead. And have fun!
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 I know I'D be down... just not sure about her. Thanks, all, for the replies.
Thaddeus Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 follow her lead. Wrong, wrong, wrong. The initiative will have to be up to you. It's highly unlikely that she'll initiate. If you wait for it, you might grow old. She'll undoubtedly want you to "take charge" (gently, of course, this isn't about force) with confidence. And if she says no, take her at her word. After all, no means no. It doesn't mean "maybe" or "try harder" or "jump through another hoop."
lora22 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Technically the third date is the seduction date, but we all know how much faith should be put into the "rules." Everyone who said something along the lines of do what feels right gave the best advice.
butcher's hook Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Clearly everyone is taking the micky here, because there is no rule that says you must have sex with someone by the third date. That is some frat house mentality of keeping score of notches on a belt, no girl goes out on a date thinking "he'd better screw me or I am outta here" Only men would create this kind of pressure on other men. Women do not think in these terms. Do you just want to screw this girl or do you see long term potential? if you wanna just screw her you might as well just try the earlier the better so you don't have to spend any more time or money on her. If you see long term potential then just relax and enjoy your time with her and do what you feel given the moment. Truth is that, it is less about what people say and more about how she responds to you.
lora22 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 This sounds incredibly stupid, because hopefully she'd have shaved for the first and second dates also, but if she's wearing a dress/skirt/shorts see if she shaved her legs - if she did that's probably an indication that she's open to the idea. Good luck
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Wrong, wrong, wrong. The initiative will have to be up to you. It's highly unlikely that she'll initiate. If you wait for it, you might grow old. She'll undoubtedly want you to "take charge" (gently, of course, this isn't about force) with confidence. And if she says no, take her at her word. After all, no means no. It doesn't mean "maybe" or "try harder" or "jump through another hoop." I agree. She hasn't shown any initiative yet and I don't expect her to. She enjoys being flirted with and seems to "go along" with the flow. If she's not down, no worries. We're supposed to be watching "The Devil's Rejects" anyway.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 This sounds incredibly stupid, because hopefully she'd have shaved for the first and second dates also, but if she's wearing a dress/skirt/shorts see if she shaved her legs - if she did that's probably an indication that she's open to the idea. Good luck She had shaved legs last time (and a skirt). Spent some time flirtatiously touching those legs.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Do you just want to screw this girl or do you see long term potential? if you wanna just screw her you might as well just try the earlier the better so you don't have to spend any more time or money on her. If you see long term potential then just relax and enjoy your time with her and do what you feel given the moment. Truth is that, it is less about what people say and more about how she responds to you. To be honest, I don't see any long-term potential. Screwing is the best plan. Good call, I'm just gonna make my move early on. Thanks BH.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 That's the irony. I'm asking these questions b/c as a romantic, I don't often know what to do about sex.
rod_in_gtown Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 LOL!!! I have a 4th date tonight and as much as I want to do the deed, I'm in no rush (of course, I say that now when my heads are calm cool and collected). That sucks that you don't see long term potential in yours. I do in mine, and I think she does as well. Yeah, see how she responds to your touch and kisses, chances are that if she gets into it, it'll happen. Good luck, keep them rubbers handy and git 'er dun!
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 That sucks that you don't see long term potential in yours. I do in mine, and I think she does as well. Yeah, see how she responds to your touch and kisses, chances are that if she gets into it, it'll happen. Good luck, keep them rubbers handy and git 'er dun! Thanks Rod. I think maybe I'm being unfair to her by saying I don't see relationship potential. It's just that she's into a lot of weird sh*t. She has a 6-foot boa constrictor and loves zombies. Need I continue?
rod_in_gtown Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Thanks Rod. I think maybe I'm being unfair to her by saying I don't see relationship potential. It's just that she's into a lot of weird sh*t. She has a 6-foot boa constrictor and loves zombies. Need I continue? Give her the benefit of the doubt. I LOVE boas but I thought they were weird and freaky before I actually held one. I still wouldn't have one but I understand people who do. And as far as zombies, I don't personally get them but that just means she's open minded about other things in life, embrace it and see what that does for her creativity.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Give her the benefit of the doubt. I LOVE boas but I thought they were weird and freaky before I actually held one. I still wouldn't have one but I understand people who do. And as far as zombies, I don't personally get them but that just means she's open minded about other things in life, embrace it and see what that does for her creativity. Thanks. I appreciate your perspective.
tanbark813 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Most girls don't wait more than 3 dates so just by probability alone it will most likely happen (provided you don't f**k it up ). And given these two points: She had shaved legs last time (and a skirt). Spent some time flirtatiously touching those legs. just that she's into a lot of weird sh*t. She has a 6-foot boa constrictor and loves zombies. ..it's pretty much in the bag.
Author kizik Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Most girls don't wait more than 3 dates so just by probability alone it will most likely happen (provided you don't f**k it up ). Thanks T, I'll do my best and suavest, and if for some reason she's not down, it'll be a big surprise to all, I suppose.
Els Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Dude. If you don't see any long-term potential, don't you think you should talk with her about that BEFORE having sex? Some women are rather naive in that they think that sex = commitment, and so having sex with her might make her feel even closer with you, and make it harder on her when you do decide to break up with her. Of course, if she already knows it's all for fun and no commitment involved; or is the kind of girl who enjoys having sex for fun... then go for it, totally.
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