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If a girl has intrest in you..will she make the first move even if you dont?

Brady_to_Moss

By Brady_to_Moss
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Brady_to_Moss Established Member

Brady_to_Moss

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If a girl has intrest in a guy and say that guy is shy..whill she end up making the first move? or will she move on thinking the guy is not interesed since most girls believe the guy should do all the work

lucy9216 Established Member

lucy9216

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More than likely the girl may move on, but it depends on the type of girl and her personality. If I really like a guy and I think he might like me, I will make small attempts to make the first move or give strong hints that he can make the first move. If he doesent take the bait I will think he is not interested and move on.

BobSacamento Established Member

BobSacamento

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It's called flirting.

kizik Established Member

kizik

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most girls believe the guy should do all the work

 

This is true, and you should go with the flow and be proactively flirtatious and gentlemanly and DON'T expect women to do ANYthing first. If you don't make the first move, there will be NO move and you'll be friended like Facebook.

Thaddeus Established Member

Thaddeus

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There's a typical double-standard here that's normal operating procedure.

 

Women want - no, they expect - equality in every sense. Equal pay for equal work, shared housework, the same access to resources and whatnot. And who'd argue with that?

 

Where it goes off the rails is that these very same women who insist on equality will be the very same ones that insist that the man always make the first move, ask for the first date, pay for outings and so forth. Equality only extends so far.

 

So if a girl has interest will she make the first move?

 

I give it one chance in seven.

CD111 Established Member

CD111

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Yes, there is a slight double standard; however, I have been the woman who wasn't afraid to make the first move or ask a guy out and it NEVER worked out for me in the end. I ended up dating men who allowed/needed me to be the dominate partner within the relationship and I ended up feeling like their mom. So due to that, I have stopped being so up front and assertive with men I could see myself dating. Now I look at it from this perspective. If the guy doesn't have the huevos to ask me out for a date then he doesn't have the confidence to be with a girl like me.

kizik Established Member

kizik

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these very same women who insist on equality will be the very same ones that insist that the man always make the first move, ask for the first date, pay for outings and so forth. Equality only extends so far.

 

Very true. Double standards exist for both genders though; I think society puts less pressure on men to be attractive, for example.

 

I ended up dating men who allowed/needed me to be the dominate partner within the relationship and I ended up feeling like their mom. So due to that, I have stopped being so up front and assertive with men I could see myself dating. Now I look at it from this perspective. If the guy doesn't have the huevos to ask me out for a date then he doesn't have the confidence to be with a girl like me.

 

Good points. This makes sense too. It's a reality (and an unfortunate one, for some) that men gotta make the moves.

CD111 Established Member

CD111

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Oops, I didn't fully answer your question. Yes I do think that there is a possibility that a girl will make the first move; however, the girl will be fairly confident and if your confidence is lacking she will eventually see through it.

Bayern Established Member

Bayern

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More times than not, I don't think she would. There are exceptions obviously, but I think most wouldn't. They might try to lure a guy in by smiling, waving, winking or whatever, but I don't see it happening more than 50% of the time.

tinklebell Established Member

tinklebell

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I've done it when I know the guys are somewhat interested. Of course I did wonder why if he was interested, he didn't make the first move first. But I needed to know for myself. However, I've also found out from all these that seriously if a guy is interested, he would ask a girl out. So I'm now less inclined to climb mountains and ask a guy out. If he's interested, he would ask me out.

lucy9216 Established Member

lucy9216

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I am curious with this discussion, is it a huge turn off for a girl to make the first move on the guy, from a guy's perspective?

kizik Established Member

kizik

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I am curious with this discussion, is it a huge turn off for a girl to make the first move on the guy, from a guy's perspective?

 

I think your question would make a great thread. But I'll answer for myself anyway:

 

Yes and no. Your move, if you make it, needs to be cute and subtle. At least for me. (Guys: I'm not speaking for you - just me.)

 

If a woman's going to make a move, it should be reaching for my hand, a kiss on the cheek, touching my arm flirtatiously. I consider myself a semi-gentleman - a chick randomly sticking her tongue down my throat or clutching my crotch like... a stickshift... simply doesn't turn me on. Not that that's ever happened.

 

I wish it had.

 

Anyway, guys should be the ones to make the moves, as uncomfortable as they might be with the idea. Embrace your instincts and all that.

Eclypse Established Member

Eclypse

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Ugh, this thread depresses me. I've been out twice with a girl I know, and although we had some moments were we could have kissed, I ended up being too shy to make my move. From the gloomy comments I've read here, it seems she will most likely shelf me and move on :(

SpanksTheMonkey Established Member

SpanksTheMonkey

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I don't see why its always up to the guy to make the 1st move? sometimes he has no clue the girl is even interested in the 1st place.

 

I actually found myself in that situation recently I pursued things are going good for the most part or also the guy can be is inexperienced/shy and so on nothing wrong with that.

 

But it dose take a patent girl for a guy like this I say if I want something I'm going to make the move and try and get it thats just me I'm a female by the way!

 

Eclypse you better pony up soon and let her know you like her cause man seams girls like me are a dying breed for some reason lol..

Eclypse Established Member

Eclypse

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Spanks if only more girls were like you the world would be a better place. You seem really confident. My girl is really shy, and so am I. I will let her now how I feel as soon as she gets back from her holiday though :) and hope for the best.

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Brady_to_Moss Established Member

Brady_to_Moss

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I think if girls learned to make the first move more often..the world would be full of happier people..both men and women.

Thaddeus Established Member

Thaddeus

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I think if girls learned to make the first move more often..the world would be full of happier people..both men and women.

+1, quoted for truth.

canigetanswers Member

canigetanswers

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wow thaddeus, u have the same thinking as me with the equality thingy! right on

MissHollywood Established Member

MissHollywood

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I think if girls learned to make the first move more often..the world would be full of happier people..both men and women.

 

 

 

Wouldn't that be confusing? I'm not into the girl-succumbs-man-leads theory but sometimes I think if we have a "system" (either only the men ask or the women ask), it might work better. In the current "way," because men and women can ask, we sometimes wonder who should ask first, did I do this wrongly so he/she didn't ask, should I not ask first lest he/she thinks I'm being pushy?

 

Just a thought. :)

girl68 Established Member

girl68

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She will IF: she's got a strong head, good will power, and a "go get what you want" attitude.

 

She will not IF: she's shy, little miss princess, got the "when a guy likes me he comes and gets me" attitude.

 

More times than not the gal will be the latter, so your chances are against you.

Trialbyfire Established Member

Trialbyfire

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She will IF: she's got a strong head, good will power, and a "go get what you want" attitude.

 

She will not IF: she's shy, little miss princess, got the "when a guy likes me he comes and gets me" attitude.

 

More times than not the gal will be the latter, so your chances are against you.

I would be a definitive #2 (not shy though), albeit strong head, good will power and "go get what I want" attitude. It hasn't failed me yet! ;)

espec10001 Established Member

espec10001

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Women will give off "hints" if she's into you, but they won't make the first move or ask you out. Those cues like blinking a lot, playing with her hair, showing off some part of her that she's proud of, laughing a lot, smiling a lot, lots of eye contact, questions about you, etc. Guy has to pick up on it and then do the asking or first move.

 

It's really a female signal of "Here I am, and I'm available. It's up to you."

carhill Established Member

carhill

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Tip: Women are aware of the signs (outlined in post above) they give off when wishing to attract a man and can use that tool to feed their ego (even if not genuinely attracted). IME, such signs are not trustworthy indications of attraction. A better tool for a man is to do what he wants to do and her receptiveness is a better indicator of attraction.

 

Never have had a woman 'make a move' on me so have no experience in that regard.

espec10001 Established Member

espec10001

Posted
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Tip: Women are aware of the signs (outlined in post above) they give off when wishing to attract a man and can use that tool to feed their ego (even if not genuinely attracted). IME, such signs are not trustworthy indications of attraction. A better tool for a man is to do what he wants to do and her receptiveness is a better indicator of attraction.

 

Never have had a woman 'make a move' on me so have no experience in that regard.

 

Good, good! You are correct! But now this begs a different question: how does a man know if these signs are a genuine attraction or simply a play on the senses?

 

The only way to know is to ask them out. Ask them out, they say no or tip toe; forget them. They are feeding their ego. If they say yes then you know it was genuine. That's what they want you to do, and if you don't ask them out and are kept wondering if she's interested or she's not, you are wasting your time. It's better to know than to keep guessing.

 

I had girls make moves on me when I was younger, gosh what fun times :love:. But as you get older the guy has to make the moves.

carhill Established Member

carhill

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this begs a different question: how does a man know if these signs are a genuine attraction or simply a play on the senses?

 

IME, the best way to determine the quality of the signals is to make an honest (meaning only do it if you feel attracted and/or otherwise interested in her) romantic and physical approach. I've found this is the quickest way to end ego feed behaviors. Give 'em a nice firm one on the lips and you'll have your answer. This works especially well with women who are apparently committed, like married or GF's, and still playing the ego feed game. Shuts them down in a nanosecond. Smile and move on :)

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