Thomas X Forever Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 They usually start when I have a dream of her. The next day (Today for example) is absolutely HORRIBLE. All day I think of everything she said, and how it's possible she's with another guy now, doing the same things we did. (I don't know if this is the case, as we haven't spoken. I logically doubt it, but that doesn't stop the anxiety and unknown from ripping me apart). I can't stop it. Real talk? It makes me want to die.
heatherb16 Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I don't think there has been one night since the break-up, that I haven't had a dream about my ex. Some days are easier than others, and you think you've finally got it, and the next day goes downhill like you've never expected. I agree. I am constantly thinking about things we've done, things we never did, or things we had planned. It sucks. It really does. But you need to stay strong. Surround yourself with the ones that will stay by your side, no matter what. Good luck.
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 Damn, that sucks you are going through the same. At this point I'm looking to meet and keep in touch with some people who are going through the same. So if you wanna talk (and anyone else who is dealing with the same pain/fear) then add "Not ThomasX" on AIM. Send me an IM.
Exit Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I'm in the same boat. I went to visit my sister today who is a few years older and got married last year. Just seeing them living together, having their own place, reminded me of all the things I wanted to accomplish with my GF. And at least once a day I think about the vacation we went on to a quiet little tourist town in IL. We had so much fun there. We escaped from the stress of our lives and I asked her "see how much better things will be once we're on our own, once we get past some of these hard times", and we both agreed that the vacation was a real inspiration and proof that we would be happy together. I've tried to put away any pictures and souvenirs that remind me of the trip, but I can't control my memories. I wonder who she'll be celebrating the 4th of July with. Probably just her family. But I can't help but wonder.
gypsi Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I feel your pain aswell bro, yes every single day for almost 5 months now i have flashbacks of all the amazing times we had, but what bothers me most is all the things we never did. We were going to travel europe together this year, we were going to buy a puppy, get a place to live, get engaged, just feels like it all ended to fast we still had so much to do you know...just feels so unfair. Your heart wants what it wants cant do a damn thing about that.
t0ri Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I'm right there with you guys, unfortunately. I am sick of dreaming about him. And like you, I keep replaying things he said to me, things he promised me, things we had planned on doing, etc. I believed him when he said he couldn't live without me, along with all of his other BS. And lately I can't stop thinking about everything I did wrong throughout our relationship. It kills me thinking how he found it so easy to replace me. It got harder before it got easier, and I'm in a much better place than I was when he first dumped me. I was doing really well, but the past week or so has been really crappy and I found myself missing him again. Probably because I saw a pic of him and the new chick he's pursuing. Over 2 months NC for me. It's bittersweet. I have faith that they'll fade from our thoughts. Slowly, but surely. Brighter days are ahead hopefully! Good luck guys
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 I shall try to stay positive. Who elses night completely ****ing sucks, and they wish they still had their ex? Cuz they'd spend the weekends with their ex? God, that's the worst part. The weekends. All my friends are with their gf's, too.
Exit Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 Yeah, weekends are the worst. These 2 months, Friday nights have always been the hardest. Certainly doesn't help hearing fireworks outside, knowing that she's probably smiling and laughing and not having 1 thought about me. Tomorrow won't be any better.
asuman Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 Ease up, amigos. I know it's rough but do you really think people who don't spend so much energy on you deserve so much energy from you on them? They clearly don't. There are lots of girls out there. You'll find a better one some day. The process of finding her begins with going out and having a good time. So try and do that if you can. (Yes, I'm taking my own medicine. Getting ready to join friends out in about an hour on this Friday night).
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 I'm tryin to tag along, Asuman. Can i? lolz
asuman Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 I'm tryin to tag along, Asuman. Can i? lolz Come along dude. Hope tickets to the west coast are cheap.
Exit Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 I wouldn't be home if I had a choice. All my friends are in relationships or just too flaky to make plans. Oh well. I'll be happy when this weekend is over.
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 Lmao what state Asuman? And Exit, same here dude. Every one of my friends have gf's and they're with them. Blows As for you mizzunderstood... who are you, kiziks alt?
Exit Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 Oops, sorry guys- I took a wrong turn and ended up in the Kindergarten forum. Carry on. Judging by your behavior I'd say you're in the right place then!
jph26 Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 Another one for flashbacks here. As mentioned before I keep thinking of all the things we did together and then thinking she's going to be doing all these things with some other guy. Things just ranging from days out together and other things such as some of the times we had great sex. Don't want to be thinking that, but it the kind of thing which plays with your head. Also knowing all the things we had lined up for the future such as holidays, engagement and marriage will never be. Just seems like a massive kick in the balls that it isn't going to happen. To top it all off aswell all my mates have girlfriends when for past couple of years i've been the only one to have a girlfriend.
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 Yeah, jph. It's horrible. I had another dream of her last night. I've always believed in God. But I'm slowly becoming an atheist. No God would put someone through this intentionally over, and over again.
whitecat Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 that sucks we're going through this Thomas, but yeah I mean I guess the real people are here in this forum. its crazy i keep getting these dreams about him and pain hard in the stomach while thinking that my ex is doing everything he did with me with his new gf. so i basically try to think of how he will regret it, when he sees me doing all these great things and imagine telling him ummm no, im not going back with you, you broke it off, plus im great with my new life. so far it works..
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 whitecat, sorry you're going through the same. I know how hard it is. I ****ing hate how things work out. I would've taken a bullet for this girl. How many guys seriously are out there who would do that? I mean REALLY do that. I would've done anything for her, and she gave me up.
hrtbrk hotel tenant Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 yeah i spent the day with my ex it was great we had a casual lunch in the park then we went to see the new transformers movie(shyt is hot by the way). We parted amicably then she called and said she had a wonderful time. Now i am constantly thinking of her and what she is doin and if i am on her mind ....she is my first real love and it hurts not being with her but i think we both agree that space is needed to separate all the past angst from the relationship. it has been a month and i freakin lost 9 lbs mostly from working out like a beast in the gym but also cuz i literally couldnt eat; the food didnt taste the same shyt i am knee deep in love with her and she knows it ....it sux but imma be strong so be strong too u are not alone.
Exit Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 How many guys seriously are out there who would do that? I mean REALLY do that. I would've done anything for her, and she gave me up. I feel the same way. I would have done anything she asked of me. Unfortunately she's too proud to ask and communicate, and I never claimed that I could read minds. So instead she just breaks up with me. If she had just asked, told me what her concerns were, I would have done anything. I had dreams about her last night. I can't remember most of the details now because I had a ton of weird dreams last night, but I think she was talking to other guys and I was getting worried and she said "I love you unconditionally" or something like that, and then I woke up and had to feel her slipping away from me.
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 exit, you and I are strikingly alike. I'd like to keep in touch with you. Can you IM me or email me? To find my email, click on my loveshack account and go to contact info, and go to my website. My email is listed on my website. Or just IM "Not ThomasX" on AIM
fani Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 That ain't good. After almosst two years of relationship, I got dumped yesteday, but stayed at his because I live far away, so officially ended today, and already whenever I see another couple holding hands or doing anythign it makes me burst into tears. You guys are saying you're having flashbacks 5 months on...I'm terrified. I don't thikn I can handle that. I can't eat or sleep already..my body is shutting down and I don't want to do anything to stop it.
Author Thomas X Forever Posted July 4, 2009 Author Posted July 4, 2009 Fani... you are welcome to contact me too.. we can help each other. No reason to be alone.
LisaUk Posted July 4, 2009 Posted July 4, 2009 I too know the pain of flashbacks, my ex left 10 months before our wedding (after 18 years together), I keep having flashbacks to being in the church with the minister discussing our vows, visiting reception venues and him holding my hand and sayiing stuff like "oh, that's a great place for photos on the day". I also just have flashbacks to feelings, just the intimacy and closeness we shared. Is really hard, I'm 4 months in now and it is getting easier, they happen less often and last night I slept well for the first time and no dreams of him!
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