totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have been at my job for roughly 5.5 months, never to curious about the guys because im too busy learning my new job and trying to make a good impression. I made an excellent impression, everyone loves me, boss's adore me, always get the so called "special attention" because im a never-say-no type and always want to please. Well about a month ago i started noticing this guy, we'll say his name is J, in the recieving portion of my work, he is a "higher-up" so they call it, basically a manager. I walk by his office everyday to get to my department and several times a day to break throughout the day. I found him on myspace and added him because i think he's cute and thought maybe we could just kinda hang. I knew he was in a relationship, a pretty serious one. but i wasnt looking for much, just friendship because i dont know many people outside of my department. He started making the comments that he thought i was hott and had a great body ect ect. well anyways today he came to my room at work and hung out for a while right before the end of the day...right around 3ish. just having fun joking and giving each other sh*t, nothing great. So one thing lead to another and we ended up going at it, it only lasted a few minutes but seemed like 20-25 minutes. Well i didnt want to get caught so i kept telling him, we gotta stop i dont want to get in trouble...I NEED MY JOB(i didnt say that but he knows that i have alot of bills and dont have any help paying for them but my own income). Karma has a way of always catching up to me and J and I got caught. Another co-worker walked in on us, then ran to rat us out. Which is understandable. I wouldnt want to be put in the situation of knowing that someone was fornicating at work and not feel obligated to tell. I did think that this co-worker was the hush hush type, until i was not so descreatly escorted out of the building by security. Im not wanting to get scolding or bash for typing this, i just couldnt tell anyone because of the amount of shame i feel and wanted to see if others have kinda had the same scenario happen to them. I just hope now that i am unemployed, when i start turning in applications to new places-will they tell them why i was fired? Very affraid of what might come of this.
WTRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I'll save you the trashing you deserve for doing that, at work, during work hours. Truth be told, do you really want to work there again and be known as the new chick who got caught screwing? You'll not exactly be treated with a whole lot of respect. All for a couple of minutes. That is, if this isn't a fake post. You and him deserve to be fired, to be ran out on a rail and to have your collective careers ruined in front of your eyes. Unfortunately a scenario like this can cost you unemployment benefits as well. What was a few minute screwing will in turn turn into a life time screwing. If I were you, I'd move across country. Especially if you stay in the same line of work. Word gets around real fast that all it takes is a few hot body comments and your panties come off real quick. Look, if you want to bang a co-worker, that's fine. But not at work for God's sakes, or at least wait until the office Christmas party to screw at work. But during a normal work day, that's just insane. However, based on how your company handles this you may have a lawsuit for your favor. If they terminate you, but keep him then I'd say you have a case.
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 Thank you for your truthfulness. Yes this is a real poster, with real feelings. I agree with everything you've said. I dont condone my actions. Just want to know if im alone in this situation, or is there other people who've done the same? Thankfully it wasnt a career, it was just a job-a get me by job till i could pay some of my bills and get back on my feet enough to look for something more stable. I would never go back even if they asked me, could never show my face around there again and i dont have any right too. I've violated something that can never be replaced and i understand that. Thank you for posting WTranger
D-Lish Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 That is, if this isn't a fake post. lol. Seriously, no way this actually happened.
WTRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I was just curious, there have been some wild posts on here lately. I'm sure there will be some people who have done the same thing. I've done the sex with co-workers, either as a drunken fling or dating, but never at work. So I can't directly speak to that. You'll need to keep an eye on how the company proceeds. As I mentioned before, depending on what happens you could be eligible for a lawsuit. With the hot body comments, with him being a manager. Granted, you gave it up for free but if they keep him and ax you, then I would suggest getting a touch with a lawyer. Well, its only about 6 months. You could keep it off your resume, but you'd have to cover why you weren't working for those 6 months. In the meantime, I'd suggest looking up any available resource on workplace law and HR law. You'll want to know how to protect yourself from a smear campaign from this employer on any future job application. Don't let a few minutes of bad judgment ruin your entire life.
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 Im also worried about my friends and family...is it going to be difficult from them finding out? My job was in another town 30 minutes away, is it possible to keep this a secret and leave it behind me?
WTRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 is it possible to keep this a secret and leave it behind me? Can you put out a house fire with a squirt gun? Absolutely not. The office rumor mill is a strong and unstoppable force. People will find out and people you know will find out. Probably a story that 1,000 times worse than what actually transpired. It depends on how far on down the rumor ladder they are. In fact, I bet it's already on the internet on someone's blog. As I've said before, know the laws and protect yourself. If you feel you are being unjustly mistreated, get legal help.
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 I know this is stupid(okay REALLY stupid) but i keep picture the cops banging down my door and hauling me in for sex in a work place! That cant happen can it? Im so stressed out I can feel 20 years of acne popping up all over my face! Rumors around town i can handle, getting hauled away in a cop car...not so much
WTRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 If your employer, or soon-to-be former employer wants to throw the book at you they could file public indecency charges against you. You won't be hauled away in a cop car, but you'd be served a summons. I doubt that will happen though. More than likely you will be fired and they'll leave it at that. Now, the person that caught you could also file suit against you for personal distress. Again, not likely but could happen. You've opened up Pandora's box here. Just lay low.
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 Thank you again, i really appreciate your honesty here! This is exactly what i needed to feel a little relief...ill know by monday for sure whats going on. Right now im on permanent suspension(which i asked my boss and she said more then likely ill be fired) I talk to J, the persons i was consorting with in the room, he's deny it to be sexual at all and that he was just in a bad position when the other co-worker walked in. which makes sense, she didnt SEE anything, she saw his back(which was facing her) and didnt even see me till we were both standing in front of her. He's denying anything sexual and my boss told me i have the option of posting "no comment" on any documentation i am given. Which No comment is the best way to go i think just so i can get it out of the way and over with and move on...
WTRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 This is a sticky situation, no pun intended. If he's going to fight it, that will drag you into this. It will get real ugly, real quick. If I were you, I'd look into getting a lawyer on retainer right now. Your employer will more than likely have to fire both of you. If they keep one and let one go, then that's discrimination. If the guy doesn't want to go as easily as you, since you are the other party involved you will get sucked into this in a very bad, probably very public way.
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 He's called me a couple times this evening letting me know what the "higher ups" have been saying to him, they've been conversing back and forth through phone conversations and it looks like alot of them believe his story and want to make sure they keep his job...and mine for that matter. Although i've already told him, i wont come back...i cant bare the humiliation.
lostsunsets Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 Go back. F- the humiliation. You messed up. If he was a superior or in a place of authority they are likely worried about a big sex harassment lawsuit, as they should be. Go back. They will treat you with kit gloves and will remember that they are the ones at risk. YOU ARE IN THE CATBIRD SEAT. In fact they may even fire the person who ratted you out. She/he was a witness. You have people here to talk to and you can get over this. At least till you find another job.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 Thank you for your truthfulness. Yes this is a real poster, with real feelings. I agree with everything you've said. I dont condone my actions. Just want to know if im alone in this situation, or is there other people who've done the same? Thankfully it wasnt a career, it was just a job-a get me by job till i could pay some of my bills and get back on my feet enough to look for something more stable. I would never go back even if they asked me, could never show my face around there again and i dont have any right too. I've violated something that can never be replaced and i understand that. Thank you for posting WTranger I hope the guy got fired too! I know this whole thing sucks... but sometimes you have to have this happen before you figure out that messing around at work is a bad idea. Keep your head up, a new job will come soon. If I can give you any one piece of general advice... don't give up the goodies so easy. I'm a very typical guy and I can say it's just not respectable. Best of Luck!
Author totallyblank Posted July 3, 2009 Author Posted July 3, 2009 thank you all for your comments, even your harsh ones! Just a reminder of how stupid i can be when i let myself go and be...well...bad lol! I've gotten many updates throughout the day from my best friend(an co-worker) and J himself. My best friend, lets say her name is A- Well A called me shortly after lunch and the lady that walked in and caught us is now telling everyone. Things are getting pretty sticky but when she gave her statement she also signed a confidentiality agreement. So there is a chance she may be fired, seeing as that agreement she signed states immediate termination if she doesnt oblige the contract. Guess there's about 4 stories circulating through the business today, and im sure they wont stop untill the entire story is something new. J has gone in a written his statement and I will be called next to give mine, probably monday I will be called in. A(best friend) said she also overheard the "higher ups" in my department talking about me coming back already. Saying Ill be written up, which is the least i would expect to be if i was allowed to come back. But that is all she heard as she was working in her room as well. I do know without a doubt that I will go back if i am allowed, as well as if the lady who caught us is gone. I guess i kinda knew all along she would squeel on this whole ordeal, as our whole department is full of woman and woman do alot of talking...gossiping and bad mouthing. (not all, but ALOT) So thats the latest. hope to find out more on monday.
Surfer Dude Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 The bitch probably ratted you out because well, she hasn't got any cock in years, and she was jealous. No other reason. Damn, I hate these jealous sexless people. Why do they ruin the fun for everyone. Still, don't **** where you eat next time. Before you F your boyfriend, you should wait till everyone goes home, if you love getting laid at work so much
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