b3nx Posted July 2, 2009 Posted July 2, 2009 Long story short, i met this girl, she is down right amazing, the kind of girl i would hope to be like the person i spend my life with. I have had many "bad bad" girlfriends who drove me insane! My mate is a really girls guy. He has a gf but has openly admitted cheating on her. I am 23 and at this point in my life i am more career focus and relationship focused. I am over the stage where i need to go our and experiment. Tonight my mate asked me to go clubbing with him and his other mate. He said we will have a singles night because he had a fight with his gf, and the club we were going to he had chosen because of the reputation for good looking girls. I was very uncomfortable about this, as i would rather go to pub and watch some sport and have a chat, i am not 16 anymore. I told my girlfriend about this and i told my mate i had to go to work tonight and would not be able to make it. My gf trusts me, and i would have loved to gone out with my mate but i have a gf, and i dont want to act single. My gf was offended by what he said because she is also friends with him. Did i do the right thing? I dont want to seem like a wimp to my gf, i felt like a idiot saying i did not want to go because i did not want to be caught up in anything, and i do regularly go out with the boys, but i feel now being 23 and in a decent relationship i have to grow up and know when something is not right. What do you think?
Nemoralis Posted July 2, 2009 Posted July 2, 2009 Are you worried you are going to cheat? If you trust yourself, there's no reason not to go. Have fun, have a few drinks, see the guys and admire the girls, then go home. You're only 23. No need to grow up too fast.
Author b3nx Posted July 2, 2009 Author Posted July 2, 2009 No i mean i know i wont cheat, but he is a cheater, like i dont want to create doubt in my girlfriend. Also i have lost respect for my mate, he has the most loving girlfriend and she is so innocent, i find him irritating when i go out with him, because she says things like i would leave my gf for that chick she looks awesome in bed. Like common like i want to spend time with someone like that. I want to show my gf that i am mature and respectable, around him he seems like a bad influence
boogieboy Posted July 2, 2009 Posted July 2, 2009 Be careful mate, dont keep blowing off your boys. If this girl dumps you in the future, you will need your mates to get you though it. Dont blow them off so often just in case. At least explain to them that you like this girl and you dont want to hit the clubs as much, and you want to hit a sports pub instead. But realize his priorities are replacing his gf.
Author b3nx Posted July 2, 2009 Author Posted July 2, 2009 ^ ohh na man i go out with the boys heaps, it is just he is the "man whore" of the group and i dont like to go out with just him. If we go a group atleast i can chill with the guys that are in relationships. I just don't want to get myself into a situation that makes me look bad you know? Like if he wanted me to act single tonight, he would have tried to introuduce girls, told a few stories when we got home, and my gf knows what he is like, i think i should be respectful to her and keep her mind as ease, i dunno
SoulSearch_CO Posted July 2, 2009 Posted July 2, 2009 Yes, you did the right thing. It's called being respectful of your GF's feelings. You'll find that it makes life easier. Sounds to me like you're maturing. Good job.
Author b3nx Posted July 2, 2009 Author Posted July 2, 2009 ^ well i am at the point in my life, where i dont want a relationship for sex or for someone, i want it because i want a life parnter, someone who will stand by me and support me. By dis-respecting my girlfriend it will only cause complications and mistrust both of which i dont think she deserves since she is so amazing to me
kassy Posted July 2, 2009 Posted July 2, 2009 It sounds like you don't want to hang out with single people... surely if your girlfriend trusts you and you trust yourself there is no problem in going out and being wing man for a mate. I do understand that this particular guy is a player... possibly you want to talk to him about it. Sounds like you are confusing your diminishing respect for him with not offending your girlfriend. You sound like a nice guy, I wouldn't worry too much... talk to your girlfriend about it - I'm sure she knows that you and him are quite different people.
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