marcsmolenski Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 Hello girls and guys... Ive posted here a short while ago... Im having a period that is now lasting a week or more filled with doubt and uneasiness.. Lemme tell you a little about my LDR... I met a girl on a game called World of Warcarft I am 25 and she is 19. The minute we started talking we were super comfortable and had an instant connection.. As a matter of fact I had a feeling I never had like I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. Well I never met her yet and I am going to change that by seeing her for a week next week July 7th-July 14th. For a while I thought we were both comfortable with making love after seeing each other first for a few days and now she says she was in a relationship where her ex BF all he wanted was her for sex and she says she has those feelings arise when she thinks about it with me... So I met her about 3 months ago and thats about when we found out we had a connection.. I live in Michigan and she lives in Pheonix and the distance is getting to me. As a guy which I find as strange is I am the one craving for affection and attention where as shes more of the strong patient type.. Well here is another kicker.... She lives with her single mom and with her being so young her mother is overly protective. Now she told me SHE CANNOT pick me up from the airport.. I am going to be staying at a hotel for a week so I guess I can just take a taxi to the hotel when I get there. So during this time she is going to be with her sister from what I gather the entire time I am down there.. So I am going to be with her AND her sister who I also met and talk with on WoW. Now there is going to be 0 alone time and no sex. Maybe she is too young for me to get involved with. I mean I never really had any meaningful relationships and to be quite honest I only had sex one time with a girl I had NO feelings for and that was 6 almost 7 years ago... Well I suppose the sex thing bothers me and I may need to learn patience on that but what really is bothering me is the distance thing. I get to see her next week but what happens after that. Are we going to be eventually at a stage where we could be comfortable to be intimate ALONE together? One other thing that bothered me is that her living with her mom and needs to dance around the subject of me dating her and yet alone being down in phoenix to see her is now Talyah (my SO) is saying she wont know how often she will be able to see me. These things are really messing with my commitment issues. She told me today she understands my frustration with the distance that this is one big patience issue... I am just so messed up about all this like I even played with the thought of not being exclusive with her and "playing the field". BUT in conclusion I AM seeing her in a week we will see how things go.. On an earlier post I had an issue about the lack of 1 on 1 time we have at a distance was bothering me so I hope all that works out. Sorry if I sound random and boggled up I just have a lot going through my internal right now and I cant really articulate it in words. But I do love her I really do its just hard to accept some things for my first REAL relationship where LOVE is involved. -Marc
hoping2heal Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 I also live with my mother, who is very protective of me. That said, I make my own decisions. Now by live with, perhaps you meant in the sense that her mother supports her. I pay my own bills and my half of the rent/util. etc. It's 50/50 so my mom if she wanted can't use the "well if you don't want to follow my rules you're out." Because it's an apt. we rent together and I pull my own weight financially. So, if that's the case; that her mother supports her and that's why she is under mother's rule ; then you can probably settle in for a long relationship of what her mother says goes. I'm a little concerned of why you feel you MUST have sex right now. Maybe she isn't ready for that? It sounds like you're willing to ditch the relationship if you can't have sex with her, you honestly don't sound like you care all that much for her beyond having sex.
Author marcsmolenski Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 Its way beyond sex I know I sounded stubborn.. But I am impatient and trying to work on that. Youre right I shouldnt even let that phase me. And I think I wont. I am better now its just a day people have in LDRs where doubt and fear creep in. .. When all is said and done and Im clear .. I love her unconditionally and would feel honored later in life if she was my wife.
Author marcsmolenski Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 Yep.. I am not feeling this way anymore.. I think I may be a bit needy and need to work on my own independence. I couldnt stand living without her. LOL
Recommended Posts