patcha Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 I really like her. She *seems* to really like me, too, because she always accept a date right away. When we're apart, we're constantly on the phone or IM. My concern is I always want to see and hear from her all the time. I always want to know what she's up to, and I always want to make her laugh and smile. When I'm with other girls, I'm always wondering about what she's up to. The problem about all this is it's only been 2 weeks. How do I slow myself down?!
boogieboy Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 I really like her. She *seems* to really like me, too, because she always accept a date right away. When we're apart, we're constantly on the phone or IM. My concern is I always want to see and hear from her all the time. I always want to know what she's up to, and I always want to make her laugh and smile. When I'm with other girls, I'm always wondering about what she's up to. The problem about all this is it's only been 2 weeks. How do I slow myself down?! The way you can slow down is to realize how clingy and needy and possessive you are being. It might get old to her after a while, and you might force her to feel smothered, and hear the "i need space" speech. Once you get to "i need space", its too late, you cant fix it. So nip it in the bud NOW. You think knowing that will make you slow down?
Phateless Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 The way you can slow down is to realize how clingy and needy and possessive you are being. It might get old to her after a while, and you might force her to feel smothered, and hear the "i need space" speech. Once you get to "i need space", its too late, you cant fix it. So nip it in the bud NOW. You think knowing that will make you slow down? That will make it worse by making him more insecure. Bro, you need to just chill out. Stay busy and distracted. You have yourself convinced that you're lucky to have her and forgetting how lucky she is to have you. You can't control this. Accept that missing her is part of the excitement and keep yourself BUSY.
Author patcha Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 The way you can slow down is to realize how clingy and needy and possessive you are being. It might get old to her after a while, and you might force her to feel smothered, and hear the "i need space" speech. Once you get to "i need space", its too late, you cant fix it. So nip it in the bud NOW. You think knowing that will make you slow down? yeah. The thing is I do know all those things, and that's why I asked for help!
Author patcha Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 You can't control this. Accept that missing her is part of the excitement and keep yourself BUSY. Thanks. I'm a girl btw. I'll keep myself busy. I don't think I'm lucky to have her. She's just really fun to have around. Kind of like playing a video game actually. What you say about missing her as being part of the excitement is extremely helpful. Thanks for that one!
Phateless Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 Thanks. I'm a girl btw. I'll keep myself busy. I don't think I'm lucky to have her. She's just really fun to have around. Kind of like playing a video game actually. What you say about missing her as being part of the excitement is extremely helpful. Thanks for that one! Oh, sorry 'bout that. There I go assuming again. You're welcome! Glad I could help. Hang in there girlie, you'll be just fine. Btw... Patcha... vii Ruskaya?
mammax3 Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 For another perspective, if she feels the same way, then why do you need to slow down? Some people may not think it sounds needy or clingy or possessive. It may be flattering, or illuminating (maybe she didn't know you like her that much)... But if you want to slow down, then practice knitting! Haha. Keeps your hands busy but you can still let your mind wander to thinking about her. Doing other stuff is a good idea too. It's hard.
leftyright1 Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 learn to like/enjoy things other than who you are pursuing -- and your time thinking about them will become more balanced and healthy.
Phateless Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 omg. what is "vii Ruskaya?" Nevermind. Patcha kinda sounded like a Russian name so I thought I'd ask.
Author patcha Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 It's Thai. Yeah. I need to find other things I enjoy equally as much as her. Gotta think what now. Gosh. Maybe some Sonic. Oh. How I miss Sega. OMG. Knitting?! I did use to cross stitch.
Phateless Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 It's Thai. Yeah. I need to find other things I enjoy equally as much as her. Gotta think what now. Gosh. Maybe some Sonic. Oh. How I miss Sega. OMG. Knitting?! I did use to cross stitch. My mom is a member on a knitting forum. I'll find out what it's called, lol.
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 It seems like she's enjoying it as much as you do. Enjoy it while it lasts!
Author patcha Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 My mom is a member on a knitting forum. I'll find out what it's called, lol. ok. let me know what her member name is on there so i can contact her for some knitting tips. Enjoy it while it lasts! aw man. but I like her!
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 aw man. but I like her! I know you do. Are you looking for something more - a relationship?
carhill Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 How do I slow myself down?! Continue being with other girls and don't forget your guy friends and interests. A well rounded life is healthy as well as more attractive to a woman/girl. If you're young (I'm assuming), such interests are generally transitory, so carpe diem.
Author patcha Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 I know you do. Are you looking for something more - a relationship? No. Not right now. I just know I like her and love being around her... hearing from her. And I am sounding so pathetic right now! It doesn't bother me, when I see her talking to other girls or guys and all that though. She could be going on dates. And when we're together, we'll just crack jokes about our dates. We just have a lot of fun being together and talking to each other. I'm afraid being this close and so fast will sizzle out. She's going out of town for 3 days. And I guess I shouldn't be all over her when she comes back. You guys think she'll totally back away, if I were to resist this urge to see & contact her all the time? I don't want her to back away... is why I ask. Continue being with other girls and don't forget your guy friends and interests. A well rounded life is healthy as well as more attractive to a woman/girl. If you're young (I'm assuming), such interests are generally transitory, so carpe diem. I don't even feel like hanging around anyone else right now. There isn't the same chemistry as there is with her. Not chemistry as in a romantic way but an overall, I can be with this person forever (not in that marriage way either) kind of chemistry. I will make an effort to hang around my other girls and guys.
carhill Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 Think about this. When you're older and married to a person who is your elemental partner, will you reject all other relationships because they do not compare in depth? Think about that. Or, conversely, will you enjoy even healthier relationships with others because of the way your primary relationship makes you feel and you approach others to share that and yourself? Everything in life is a balance. Sometimes you just feel the balance and sometimes you have to think it. A balance between emotion and intellect/experience. Enjoy!
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