Ilovehim Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 Okay...I need some advice on this situation... I was taking up summer courses and I met someone through my friend...it'd be usually during lunch or breaks we had, that we would all hang out...There was a lot of flirting between me and this guy but I only met him a couple of times...He suggested we hung out and we got around the conversations of getting each other's numbers and I was going to give it to him but it slipped my mind...To make a long story short, summer session is over..he doesn't go to my school and the only way I have to talk to him is if I ask my friend for his number...This one time I was hanging out with my friend and the guy called so he was like "tell her i said hii, how is she??" I really like this guy and from the vibes I got he probably did too...he told me he thinks Im very pretty and that we should hang out but as I said whenever I would give him my number, I would forget and tell him I'd give it to him later...I want to see him and see if I really like him though but I dont want to look like a crazy stalker.....LOL...So how do I get in touch with him?? any ideas guys???
The Blue Pill Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 Be playful about it, but get the number from your friend, and use it to give him YOUR number. Call him or text him and say that you got his number from [friend's name] and that you never did give him your number, so here it is if you ever want to use it, lol. Can't speak for everyone, but if I were into you even a little bit, that'd make my day.
Jilly Bean Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 And the reason he can't ask your friend for YOUR number, is... ?
Author Ilovehim Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 And the reason he can't ask your friend for YOUR number, is... ? lol i don't know...I guess all 3 of us are more "acquantances" than anything...as in if we randomly see each other or happen to be at the same place we'll hang out and be cool...if we need something we'll call but other than that we're not "friends"... and i'm referring to "me and my friend" and "him and my friend"...neither one of us are exactly "friends" with this person.... I know it's weird....But i reallyyyy like spending getting to know this guy...i don't want to use "like" yet because i dont know him that well but i feel mad that i "missed out" on this....i feel embarrased if i were to text this guy....i do not want to seem like a stalker...but at the same time i really want to get to know him..and he was the one who asked me to hang out...maybe im putting too much thought into this but i dont like people easily...and i ahve been lonely for a year now because i am very picky :/ what should i do??
Left in a Lurch Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 "whenever I would give him my number, I would forget and tell him I'd give it to him later..." That's a pretty straight-out-of-the-book mixed signal. Put yourself in his position- he asks for your number or you talk about exchanging numbers and you forget multiple times to give it to him? I've had women do that, you ask for their number and they say get it from a mutual friend, or I'll give it to you later... that's a pretty clear signal that you don't want him to have your number, namely the fact that you are not giving him your number at the time you talk about it. Multiple times. I can't think of many things easier in life that don't involve farting or burping, than giving someone your phone number. It takes all of 5 seconds and no real physical effort. If you asked him for his number and he said sure, I'll give it to you later, and he never ended up giving it to you, how would you take it? Your signals could be taken 1 of 3 ways: 1. You don't value him enough to remember to give him your number, he doesn't rate that high with you, you're not overly interested. 2. You don't want to give him your number, so you talk about it but never follow through, turning him down politely. 3. You really like him and for some reason just can't seem to remember to give him your number after talking about it and seeing him more than once. 1. and 2. are probably more likely in his mind. I am not big on getting a phone number through a friend because usually I ask the woman directly and either I get it or I don't. If I talked about it with her and she purposely did not give it to me multiple times, why would I expect it to be ok to get it from her friend? Just call him, you have an easy in. All you have to do is get his number from your friend and say you're just calling because you forgot to give him your number. Hell, your friend could just call him and give it to him and tell him "call her" and I bet he would. You don't have to worry about being a stalker, female stalkers rock.
Author Ilovehim Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 "whenever I would give him my number, I would forget and tell him I'd give it to him later..." That's a pretty straight-out-of-the-book mixed signal. Put yourself in his position- he asks for your number or you talk about exchanging numbers and you forget multiple times to give it to him? I've had women do that, you ask for their number and they say get it from a mutual friend, or I'll give it to you later... that's a pretty clear signal that you don't want him to have your number, namely the fact that you are not giving him your number at the time you talk about it. Multiple times. I can't think of many things easier in life that don't involve farting or burping, than giving someone your phone number. It takes all of 5 seconds and no real physical effort. If you asked him for his number and he said sure, I'll give it to you later, and he never ended up giving it to you, how would you take it? Your signals could be taken 1 of 3 ways: 1. You don't value him enough to remember to give him your number, he doesn't rate that high with you, you're not overly interested. 2. You don't want to give him your number, so you talk about it but never follow through, turning him down politely. 3. You really like him and for some reason just can't seem to remember to give him your number after talking about it and seeing him more than once. 1. and 2. are probably more likely in his mind. I am not big on getting a phone number through a friend because usually I ask the woman directly and either I get it or I don't. If I talked about it with her and she purposely did not give it to me multiple times, why would I expect it to be ok to get it from her friend? Just call him, you have an easy in. All you have to do is get his number from your friend and say you're just calling because you forgot to give him your number. Hell, your friend could just call him and give it to him and tell him "call her" and I bet he would. You don't have to worry about being a stalker, female stalkers rock. Wow...thanks for yourinput but it wasnt exactly like that...he saw a HILARIOUS FWD text that someone sent me and told me to forward it to him...and I said later...he didnt directly say "oh what is your number?"..and he asked me if i would like to go to the beach with him when I have free time (i was telling him how im always busy)... so it wasn't really him trying to chase me or anything and me running away...just two people who met each other a couple of times and now i dont see him anymore but would REALLY like to....so yeah, bascially I can't just call him and say "hi, here is my number sorry i forgot to give it to you." I just don't want to seem like I'm obsessed with him...honestly all I want is a chance to get to know him because I really enjoyed spending time with him and talking to him and it seemed as though the feelings were mutual...However I don't want to turn him off...sooo basically Im asking for a way to get in touch with him without being "stalkerish" or "weird" to him...???
Author Ilovehim Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 facebook.... he doesn't have a facebook or any online sites. Would it be weird if I just texted him saying hi that i got his number from my friend....Guys if you flirted with a girl, told her she was very pretty and asked her to hang out but then had no chance to see her and she texted u saying she got ur number from your friend....would you think she was a stalker?? lol
SoulSearch_CO Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 he doesn't have a facebook or any online sites. Would it be weird if I just texted him saying hi that i got his number from my friend....Guys if you flirted with a girl, told her she was very pretty and asked her to hang out but then had no chance to see her and she texted u saying she got ur number from your friend....would you think she was a stalker?? lol I'd go for it on the text. I'm not up usually for girls chasing guys, but I think with the subtle ways he was trying to get your number, he is interested. If not, what do you have to lose? Send him that text he asked you to forward to him. If he likes you, he'll be pleasantly surprised. If he doesn't, no harm done. It's not like he's going to send over the villagers with pitchforks to hunt down the crazy stalker. But I would leave it at one text message, period. This way you open the door, he has your number, if he's truly interested and still available, he'll call or text you.
Author Ilovehim Posted June 30, 2009 Author Posted June 30, 2009 I'd go for it on the text. I'm not up usually for girls chasing guys, but I think with the subtle ways he was trying to get your number, he is interested. If not, what do you have to lose? Send him that text he asked you to forward to him. If he likes you, he'll be pleasantly surprised. If he doesn't, no harm done. It's not like he's going to send over the villagers with pitchforks to hunt down the crazy stalker. But I would leave it at one text message, period. This way you open the door, he has your number, if he's truly interested and still available, he'll call or text you. good advice..i no longer have that text though..so what should i say in a text??
Left in a Lurch Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 You obviously like him and are interested so just be adult and call him. I think when women expect a guy has to call to initiate everything they might be over estimating their appeal to him. It's not always a case where we are so love struck that we are just dying to call you and thinking about you every minute, and need to "man-up". Sometimes we think, "She was cool and good looking. Maybe if I see her again I'll ask her out." The other end of that is if I don't see her I am not going to lose sleep over it, there are a lot of other women out there. Doesn't mean we are not interested, just means we are not infatuated or desperate. Personally I think most women won't call purely on the fear of rejection and possbily not keeping the upperhand to control the "chase" game so they hide behind their dating "rules" game. Games are for kids. If you like him as much as you say, be adult and call him because he is probably talking to another woman right at this moment and you are going to lose him to another woman because you were too afraid to call or believe in silly dating rules. Conquering minor fears like initiating a call will go a long way in life. Besides, if he called you would you think he was obsessed with you? So why would it be any different if you called him other than you know that you are a little obsessed with him? If you are still not with me just think how it will feel the next time you see him somewhere with his brand new girlfriend that wasn't afraid to call him, a confident woman that will live happily ever after while you sit alone by the phone waiting for it to ring . Just call.
Confusedalways Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 good advice..i no longer have that text though..so what should i say in a text?? Ok I am a big texter when it comes to these kinds of things. I would say something like Hey, it's (my name)! X gave me your number A) when am I going to see you now that summer session is over? B) Just hit me today how glad I am summer session is over, what do you think you'll get in the class? C) I miss our chats! haha. You can even say Hey whoever, it's Sarah, sorry to be creepy but ____ gave me your number and I wanted to give you mine! You're focusing WAY TOO MUCH on looking like a 'stalker.' Nobody in our generation cares about how people got their number/facebook/twitter/ etc anymore. It's done ALL the time. Just text him, or you will always wonder.
JohnnyBlaze Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 If you do feel like cold calling/texting him would be too close to stalking, ask your friend to give him your number. Your friend will go see him and say "hey, she wanted me to give you this". That way, he knows that you asked to have the number given to him (which means it's okay for him to use the number). Plus, as a bonus, it lets him know that you've been thinking about him. Guys may not admit to it publicly, but we do secretly enjoy knowing that someone's thinking about us.
boogieboy Posted June 30, 2009 Posted June 30, 2009 Just get his number and say "hi its ______, got your number from ____, how r ya?" You have nothing to lose, he either will like to hear from you, or he wont. You should not be thinking about this so much, or building up expectations to be dissapointed. And No, one text does not make a stalker.
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