hrtbrk hotel tenant Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 okay i have yet to officially start NC well today i guess. I called my ex last night to say hello and the first convo was all good quick and cordial. But didnt lissen to the 6 pk and called her back begging(BIG NO NO) and asking her about a guy she is currently seeing(we broke up 3 wks ago. She said she likes him but it aint really nuthing(yet?) and i was reeling being desparate and telling her i love her and i want her she said she doesnt be with me anymore. She said she doesnt know about later but right now she doesnt. We have constantly broken up over the 3 yr relationship but neva been more than a few dayz before we got back together. I think we love each other and wanted to be together. Had a lot of turmoil in the beginning which salted the relationship. I wanna start brand new with her so i am trying to give her space. But she is seeing someone else that she likes so i figure the longer i wait the more chance she has to be with him...what to do what to do. i am tryin the NC thing but we go to the same gym and i dont know roughly if i will bump into her. I saw her this morning in gym aerobics class i said hey and then after class i left(early so it wouldnt be akward). NC NC from NC tryin the NC. I hate it cuz i miss her so much and i am trying to preoccupy myself but it is hard. I went to the mall to try to find this gurl i find attractive but as luck has it she wasnt there. I am bored and wanna ask her out tonight but i wont call her..dammit NC just shoot me already!!!!!!!!!!!!
Exit Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 I know it's not easy, but try not to worry about the new guy so much. You have 3 years of history with her which is a big advantage. You've only been broken up for 3 weeks and she's seeing this guy, which means it's a rebound, unless she was wanting to be with him before leaving you. Try to have confidence in yourself. What is this guy going to offer her that you have to fear? If you think you two belong together, it will happen. She is probably trying to just get her mind off things right now, just like you going to the mall to try to find someone to ask out. I'm not trying to give you false hope. It's a 50/50 chance. Yes, in the realm of all possibilities, she could marry this guy and never see you again. But there is no reason to sit around thinking negatively like that, there's just as much of a chance that this other guy will be a dud and make her realize what she had with you. As far as NC, please try to do it for a week or two at least. Right now you feel like you want to talk to her, but you are in an emotional state and can't trust yourself right now. NC is the best thing to do, and you will realize it eventually, whether you actually did it or not. So imagine a month from now, will she feel better about you if you called and begged her for a month, or if you gave her the space that she asked for?? Just try to stay occupied and the time will go faster than you think. Go out with friends whenever possible even if you want to sit home and be depressed. Force yourself. Get a book that you'd like to read. Watch a movie. Start a diet or a new workout program. Don't let your bruised ego beat you down all day about how great this new guy must be or that you lost her forever, it simply isn't true. Practice controlling your thoughts. If you don't, you will regret your behavior when you finally push her away forever. Let her see this guy and don't sweat it.
juschilln Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 like the above post said go NO CONTACT dont worry about her and her new man. im in the similar situation been no contact for 16 days shes already emotionally cheating on him from the text she sent me the other night in which i didnt respond to...if u were good to her and you tried your best to make it work thats all u can do. either she will come running back then its your decision what u want to do or you will move on and find someone else better!!
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