stefspets Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 My attention span is way too short to read the entire thread (of which a lot of the posts keep repeating the same things), but I am glad you broke up with your girlfriend, seeing as how you had so little respect for her.
Author Eleventy Posted June 26, 2009 Author Posted June 26, 2009 It seems the lesson here is one should be with someone he/she respects for the qualities he/she finds critical in sustaining a relationship. Otherwise the resulted disappointment/frustrations will easily turn into a resentment, which is not good for either party. OP, Stick with women who are on the same level with you. It seems many replies are concerned in a way that you have grown to dislike this young woman to a rather disconcerting degree, which is not fair for her. It is good that you parted ways with her; you have your feelings to protect, so does she. In a way, I am pickier than you for I prefer dating someone with a similar academic background only because it allows me to speak what I have in mind without having to explain/worry that it'll bore him. Yet there are tons of intelligent men whose minds are wired in a completely different direction. Also in the past I have seen people who are extraordinary intelligent (even to a semi-genius level) yet do not quite understand how their careless criticism/remarks hurt others around him. Nowadays I think I became more appreciative of intelligent men who are also modest and considerate of others' feelings. As we grow older and more experienced, running into both smart jerks and not-so-smart jerks, in the end we all learn to appreciate a kind heart. These kind people may not be your cup of tea, but then you don't have to date one of them anyway :-) I am all for kind people. But abusing animals... I just cannot fathom how people are being so apologetic for such actions. As if correcting grammar a few times is somehow comparable! Hardly.
EddieN Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 Hey man, this is how you should have handled this situation in your mind: "Crap, what is this girl doing? First the math thing and now this? ... Wait a minute...why am I dating a 17 year old? *break up* 3 seconds later... *move on* " I agree that at 17 she should know better than to do this stuff, but you can't take it so seriously. Just tell yourself that she's immature for her age and not right for you. Realize that she'll learn and hopefully fix these flaws with age. When I was 17 I did some really dumb **** too, and I consider myself pretty smart and mature. Now I look back at what an idiot I was and realized that I've learned something. She'll maybe do the same. Point is it's not your concern if you don't want to be with her.
Author Eleventy Posted June 26, 2009 Author Posted June 26, 2009 Hey man, this is how you should have handled this situation in your mind: "Crap, what is this girl doing? First the math thing and now this? ... Wait a minute...why am I dating a 17 year old? *break up* 3 seconds later... *move on* " I agree that at 17 she should know better than to do this stuff, but you can't take it so seriously. Just tell yourself that she's immature for her age and not right for you. Realize that she'll learn and hopefully fix these flaws with age. When I was 17 I did some really dumb **** too, and I consider myself pretty smart and mature. Now I look back at what an idiot I was and realized that I've learned something. She'll maybe do the same. Point is it's not your concern if you don't want to be with her. Yep, very true. I was just so shocked at this animal thing. It was totally out of nowhere and I don't know ANYONE who has ever treated their animals like that.
EddieN Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 Yeah I know what you mean. I have a girl cousin that has a ferret and she torments that thing. I mean, she loves it to death (ha), but the way she holds it and hugs it tight...I can just tell it's thinking, "PLEASE GOD TAKE ME NOW!" But you're not gonna stop kids who mishandle their pets, nor is it that much of a crime. And to give dreamer and cherry the benefit of the doubt, there have been times where I had a reaction to something and accidentally struck one of my dogs, sometimes hard enough so they squeal. Of course I feel horrible for doing afterwards and make up for it by petting gently, but if they bit my finger enough to make it bleed I probably would be more concerned about taking care of that then making even. So I don't know. She sounds a bit immature, but just let it go. It's been said a million times, but she's only 17 afterall...she does dumb stuff like we all did.
Author Eleventy Posted June 26, 2009 Author Posted June 26, 2009 Maybe my experiences have just been way too abnormal or something, then. I can never see myself injuring an animal, no matter what happened, even if I were 17, 14, 10, whatever. Regardless, I had specifically told her beforehand NOT to scare or physically hit the puppy if it bit her. And then like 40 seconds later, BAM. Oi. It wasn't like an instant reaction either. It bit her, she exclaimed her discontent, and then proceeded to strike it with deliberate force.
eiithan Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 Maybe my experiences have just been way too abnormal or something, then. I can never see myself injuring an animal, no matter what happened, even if I were 17, 14, 10, whatever. Regardless, I had specifically told her beforehand NOT to scare or physically hit the puppy if it bit her. And then like 40 seconds later, BAM. Oi. It wasn't like an instant reaction either. It bit her, she exclaimed her discontent, and then proceeded to strike it with deliberate force. It's called a deal breaker. When you see it, especially a big one, I advise you to run off immediately. In many cases of older-younger relationship, when the older person sees a fault in the younger person and falls into the saviour syndrome that she/he can fix it somehow, it is like digging one's own grave. People do not change until they decide to change themselves. Education, experience, and others factor in this transformation, but behind the change is always self-awareness and realisation, not someone who tells them to do so. Years later when she grows into an adult, you may be surprised. However, for the time being, she does not seem right for you.
Bayern Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 Eleventy, it's not worth arguing anymore. If you're as smart as you say you are, you'd realize the loveshack internet forum is not all that important (in terms of arguing so seriously with someone for so long in multiple threads).
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