asuman Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 Yeah, me, the one who's been talking tough for days about how I'm going NC. What happened is simple. I had drinks with a friend last night, whose girlfriend is a mutual friend of the ex. (I'll call her that for lack of a better word. Reminder: We dated for 2 months, I thought it was going great, then she suddenly dumped me). I told him that I was trying to convince myself that she'd met someone else and that's what explained her sudden decision. But he told me that his girlfriend, who knows the ex, is totally convinced that what really happened is that I got too close to her, she has some freaky relationship-phobia, and she dumped me for that reason. (Background: she'd told me that she had this kind of issue, and had never actually been in a relationship that lasted beyond 3 months, despite being in her early 30s and very attractive). Now, in reaction to this I told my friend, "This is a problem for me, because it makes no sense for me to contact her if she's with someone else. But if the real reason she dumped me is because she basically got scared of liking me, I'm tempted to call her up and see if we can at least talk this through." Of course my friend freaked out at this suggestion and said no no no, she's screwed up, she's got relationship issues, I don't want anything to do with that, blah blah blah. Most of you know how hung up I am on this girl. I like her a *lot*. Should I really just stay away and disappear from her life? Should I stick to NC? It's been 5 days since the dumping. I'm wavering.
loveshy Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 Hi I read your previous posts and some of the things are similar to my case.. As you see you wanted to break up from her... I think that is the period when she also felt same of breaking up with you.. and started detaching yourself from you.. Some questions.. - Do you think that she didn't do much in the relationship? - Was there enough communication between you 2? - Did she had some anti social behaviour? - Did you think she was a bit strange? As such this relationship was not healthy for you. This girl took you for granted as you were doing everything for her.. As such you turned out to be a nice guy but some women just like guys who play hard to get.. From my experience NC would be the best thing to do.... Caliguy had written an article on second chances which is very useful... So take your time before you get back.. Do not give her any attention and begone from her life.. If she needs to have you then she needs to do a lot of work.. And Do not talk about relationship with her.. Be very happy and enjoy your life..
Author asuman Posted June 26, 2009 Author Posted June 26, 2009 Hi I read your previous posts and some of the things are similar to my case.. As you see you wanted to break up from her... I think that is the period when she also felt same of breaking up with you.. and started detaching yourself from you.. Some questions.. - Do you think that she didn't do much in the relationship? Correct. She just showed up. But, I'm the guy, and it was only 7 dates, so I'm ok with taking the initiative at the early stages. - Was there enough communication between you 2? No. - Did she had some anti social behaviour? That hadn't occurred to me. Not really. Her behavior was fine when we were on dates. - Did you think she was a bit strange? Her not dating anyone for more than 3 months is strange. As such this relationship was not healthy for you. This girl took you for granted as you were doing everything for her.. As such you turned out to be a nice guy but some women just like guys who play hard to get.. From my experience NC would be the best thing to do.... Caliguy had written an article on second chances which is very useful... So take your time before you get back.. Do not give her any attention and begone from her life.. If she needs to have you then she needs to do a lot of work.. And Do not talk about relationship with her.. Be very happy and enjoy your life.. Sigh. Good advice.
loveshy Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 I classify them as parasite. They dont give anything back.. Just for own's pleasure.. And dont care.. Get another girl... Unless this girl changes her behaviour she is a waste..
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