datura_noir Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Just watching this whole story playing out now....having bad triggers, esp. when he went to SA to "break it off in person". On Father's Day.For 7 days!! Yuk! WTF is wrong with these selfish A-holes????
tami-chan Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Just watching this whole story playing out now....having bad triggers, esp. when he went to SA to "break it off in person". On Father's Day.For 7 days!! Yuk! WTF is wrong with these selfish A-holes???? LOL....the politicking is starting...he didnt have to stay for 7 days to break it off...he didnt even have to take the trip-lol...give me a break! Besides, his wife said they had already separated two weeks before the trip... He should just do a Rudy Giuliani....accept it, own it and move on...
NoIDidn't Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Datura I can't say that I am surprised. When I first heard the news of his disappearance and that he did it frequently, an affair is the first thing that came to mind. Either that or being a drug/gambling addict. Its a shame, either way. At least these men are getting that they shouldn't hide behind their W's skirts if they want to run around behind her back. (By "these men", I mean poticians - their policy of shaming their Ws with them seems to have ended, thanks to former Mayor Kwame's W starting the trend.)
bentnotbroken Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 It is so disgusting to me that a he would publicly be so ignorant. His wife and kids...give me a freaking break. What the hell was he tearing up for on t.v. ? Isn't that what he wanted, the limelight. Prick.
OFGnomore Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I think his W handled him perfectly very much the same way my H handled me. I see too many BSs cling tightly to "the prize". Unfortunately w/o making a WS really like they have something to lose (H had me pack and move out, cut off all my access to our $, etc. and publicly spread emails to let our community know what me and xMM did) IMO, this how you get the best chance of a genuine reconcilation. Not public humilation, but public accountabilty. There's another board I used visit while in the affair that supports them, and can't tell you the number of times I've seen WHs resume the affair when the dust settles at home. I think a lot of men bank on a woman's capacity to forgive or financial dependancy and use this in the calculus when choosing an affair. In the end, most who come through this in a "healthy" way realize there are no "winners or heros" in the aftermath of affairs, whether you've paid a price or not. What I'm also learning 7 months out is humilty from all parties (BSs & WSs) goes A LONG way in the healing process.
asireen Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 What is wrong is that he did some of this using his state tax dollars. Other than that, it is his personal life, its between him and his wife. Instead of going on and on about his affair, he could have just said that he spent the state tax dollars for something personal, and would reimburse the state. Why confess to the affair, and in public?
Spark1111 Posted July 6, 2009 Posted July 6, 2009 Ah, but here is the background: His wife, found an email months ago and confronted him. They went to counseling and to their pastor. The gov then begged to meet his paramour face-to-face to say good-bye and was chaperoned by the pastor after the wife consented. Alas, he never truly established NC, so now this mess. She is done. Buh-bye GOV. And sadly, how typical is this scenario? The busted spouse says and does all the right things, but only to create a facade with the wife and children so they can keep seeing the OW/OM? My heart breaks for the children. Imagine the four sons of Steve McNair waking up to find out not only was daddy killed, it was probably at the hands of his 20 year old girlfriend. How is that for childhood trauma? These selfish and self-absorbed people just never seem to think of the effects of their affairs on their children, do they?
OFGnomore Posted July 6, 2009 Posted July 6, 2009 Ah, but here is the background: His wife, found an email months ago and confronted him. They went to counseling and to their pastor. The gov then begged to meet his paramour face-to-face to say good-bye and was chaperoned by the pastor after the wife consented. Alas, he never truly established NC, so now this mess. She is done. Buh-bye GOV. And sadly, how typical is this scenario? The busted spouse says and does all the right things, but only to create a facade with the wife and children so they can keep seeing the OW/OM? From my experience, the chances for a true reconciliation are increased if a person confesses on their own accord versus getting caught or coerced into confessing. I have see many scenarios where the partners continue on in the affair when the dust settles. One female OW described on another blog how her MM (with her in the hotel naked next to him in the bed) was begging W for forgivness and reconcilation - tears and everything. Very sad. And these women think all of a sudden their Hs had epiphanies of honesty!! Trust takes A LONG time to rebuild.
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