Author rod_in_gtown Posted June 25, 2009 Author Posted June 25, 2009 Been in floral design for years and years now.....I've NEVER heard of women being upset that the flowers came to their work! Just the opposite actually! Many a time though, I've had to write card messages that I just KNEW would make the recipient cringe to see in a handwriting that they didn't recognize. Rod, maybe you should start just signing your name to the card and leaving it at that! I continue to underestimate the power of simplicity. The first one was "thinking of you - Rod" and it went over well. I don't know why I felt the pressure to up the ante...
Author rod_in_gtown Posted June 25, 2009 Author Posted June 25, 2009 Send her some Godiva to 'apologize' I don't know what kind of commotion this caused in the office, I'm thinking it's better to leave it with the email apology I sent her and not stir the office mill anymore.
Confusedalways Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Less is more! But a nice gesture anyway. Sounds like it will pass
Left in a Lurch Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Chat Room Hero - her silly friend probably told your girl that she told you what to write. Women don't keep those kinds of secrets between friends and your girl prob got turn off by that. It would ruin the entire gesture for me. Never write something on a card for someone else. The card is just as important as the flowers, a heartfelt note and keeping it simple is all we want really. Even if it says "thinking of you happy b-day", enough said! She probably got turned off by my face, but if I had wrote it, it would have been a disaster anyway. It probably would have read, "Hi. My name is XXX. These flowers are for you. I hope you are not allergic to them." I didn't know her very well at the time, we just started going out so it seemed like a good idea at the time. I figure if I don't send flowers anymore I won't really lose out on anything. When I have shown up for dates before with flowers it always seemed like a good idea until I got there, and then I always felt like a "confident" man that women really want would have shown up with a smile and a box of condoms. The reactions I would get bringing flowers was like they were a little embarrassed so I am committed to no flowers until I have been married for 10 years. Based on the responses, it seems to confirm that getting flowers is embarrassing in a lot of situations for women that are not married, unless they get them when no one else is around or will see them. Just tells me to save the $$$.
Lucky_One Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 The reactions I would get bringing flowers was like they were a little embarrassed so I am committed to no flowers until I have been married for 10 years. Dude, you ain't gonna get married any time soon, and you won't be staying married for 10 years if you are worried about spending a measly $40 on some flowers. Women (except for a few very odd ones) love getting flowers. Especially at work. Otherwise, you don't get to enjoy them as much. And it shows everyone how desirable you are (even if they come from your dad, your BF, your H, or your best girl friend). There is no need to talk with others about the card or the flowers; you just smile mysteriously and say "Yes, aren't they beautiful?" and "Yes, I am a very lucky woman." Even if they are apology flowers or stalker flowers or sympathy flowers or what a great f*ck flowers, you don't have to discuss them - keep the coworkers guessing. Rod, I suspect she will get over it; sounds like her emotions over the recent death may have made her a little touchy. Don't sweat it too much. And plan a nice evening with her for the weekend.
Left in a Lurch Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 It's not about $40, I make a lot and have no problem spending it on someone, it's about flowers not always going over well. The 2 women I could have married, I never bought flowers, it never came up, never an issue. Flowers obviously are not a requirement to get married. "Women (except for a few very odd ones) love getting flowers. Especially at work." I disagree. A lot of women don't want attention on their personal life brought into work, and others on the forum have mentioned it. It's one thing when you have been going out for a long time or are engaged. Plus if they are not sure how they feel about you yet, gifts-even flowers, may be off-putting.
Trialbyfire Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Chat Room Hero, if you're not very good at social cues or writing, it's probably best not to send flowers until you know for certain, she's really into you. One thing's for certain. You don't understand women, if you believe that most don't like to get flowers at work. Most of us love to get flowers at work but only from someone we have romantic feelings about. Also, any message inside needs to be appropriate and situationally appropriate, even if we do have romantic feelings for them. If you're expressing undying love for someone who you've only dated a few times or never dated, it's def. stalkerish!
Lizzie60 Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I did a little survey here at the office... on 15 women.. only 4 said they would love to get flowers at work.. the other 11 women said it was tacky and kind of embarassing.. they love to get the flowers BUT at home.. not work... Same here.. I hate flowers at work... send them at my place anytime..
Soul-Searcher Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I love getting flowers. Period. So do I lol. I would love it if my BF did that. I have still kept the roses from my last 2 birthdays.
missdependant Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I love getting flowers. Period. Me too. But I hate tacky cards.
Lyssa Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Me too. But I hate tacky cards. I'm lucky that I haven't received any tacky cards! I can't stand candies though - you know the ones with those huge lollipops with overly decorative basket! My poor assistant received one from her BF and she was so embarrassed by it.
Trialbyfire Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Tacky cards, stuffed animals, helium balloons or tacky (cookies, candies, etc.) arrangements. *shudders* Simple but elegant arrangements, down to a single rose or bud vase.
butcher's hook Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Based on the responses, it seems to confirm that getting flowers is embarrassing in a lot of situations for women that are not married, unless they get them when no one else is around or will see them. Just tells me to save the $$$. Based on which responses? The ones here? Because all in all with the exception of 2 women, everyone here said they love to get flowers at work. We would hate tacky cards not the flowers. Thank goodness I have always had cards that said just the right thing. For what it's worth I think your comment about "hope you are not allergic" was cute and harmless. I chuckled! There is no accounting for how a PMSing woman is going to react to the most innocuous stuff. She clearly wasn't worth your trouble.
Star Gazer Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I did a little survey here at the office... on 15 women.. only 4 said they would love to get flowers at work.. the other 11 women said it was tacky and kind of embarassing.. I don't believe that for a second. You must have asked a loaded question: "Sending flowers to work is tacky, right? :rolleyes:" Either that, or you work with some very bizarre women. I just conducted the wonen on my floor (we're on multiple floors), and ALL of them said they would LOVE to get flowers at work, and are JEALOUS of women who do get them. My BF has sent me flowers to work 3 times. Each time, everyone gave my man props for doing so. One GUY even said, "Ah man, he's making the rest of us look bad. Note to self: send GF flowers tomorrow." A gesture like that should NEVER be unappreciated.
donnamaybe Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I don't believe that for a second. You must have asked a loaded question: "Sending flowers to work is tacky, right? :rolleyes:" Either that, or you work with some very bizarre women. I just conducted the wonen on my floor (we're on multiple floors), and ALL of them said they would LOVE to get flowers at work, and are JEALOUS of women who do get them. My BF has sent me flowers to work 3 times. Each time, everyone gave my man props for doing so. One GUY even said, "Ah man, he's making the rest of us look bad. Note to self: send GF flowers tomorrow." A gesture like that should NEVER be unappreciated. Every time I've received flowers at work, the gals are always envious. I agree with you, SG. Loaded question or bizarre women. Or perhaps women who never get flowers.
Star Gazer Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Every time I've received flowers at work, the gals are always envious. I agree with you, SG. Loaded question or bizarre women. Or perhaps women who never get flowers. Holy typo! I meant to say "conducted a poll of the women"... Jeez. My fingers are lazy today. But yes... I'm thinking perhaps the ones who find it tacky are the same women who never, ever, ever get flowers. Poor things.
NoTNorMal Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I spent one day with a girl in another state recently and thought we were perfect for each other. I didn't even hardly get to know her at all. I sent her some presents, later including flowers, to her friendly workplace. She could have sent me an email saying she was involved with someone and just said that I was nice or something, but no thanks though. She really liked me and had a boyfriend too. She didn't know what to do, so she let it go on and on, me trying to contact her. Eventually, she freaked out and went to the police department and reported me for harrasment. It would have taken 2 minutes or less to send me a not interested email. But I somehow ruined her life and now have a bad mark on my FBI file.
Left in a Lurch Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 I did a little survey here at the office... on 15 women.. only 4 said they would love to get flowers at work.. the other 11 women said it was tacky and kind of embarassing.. they love to get the flowers BUT at home.. not work... Same here.. I hate flowers at work... send them at my place anytime.. Huh, I guess I was right. Embarrassing and tacky. That's how I feel that they will feel if I send them. Evidently I do understand women a little.
butcher's hook Posted June 25, 2009 Posted June 25, 2009 Huh, I guess I was right. Embarrassing and tacky. That's how I feel that they will feel if I send them. Evidently I do understand women a little. Do you realize you even do what you do? You seek out the ONE example that suits your needs and determine ALL women think that way and therefore your theory that flowers are useless is a valid one! Hilarious!! Hate to break it to you but you couldn't be further from understanding women in general. The vast majority would disagree with that comment you are clutching to.
Author rod_in_gtown Posted July 1, 2009 Author Posted July 1, 2009 Still nothing. I'm calling this one...
Chocolat Posted July 1, 2009 Posted July 1, 2009 My guess is I'm out $40 for some stupid rose plant and teddy bear arrangement that got planted in the garbage and only gets watered when it rains at the city dump. It sucks knowing I sent those flowers to their premature death. The flowers were fine. Unless she's under the age of 10, the Teddy Bear is a bad idea.
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