Phateless Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 "It appears that ordinary men take wives because possession is not possible without marriage, and that ordinary women accept husbands because marriage is not possible without possession . . ." -Far From The Madding Crowd by Thomas Hardy Thought this was interesting... Discuss.
Trialbyfire Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 He is mine and I am his. That's my MO for committed relationships, married or otherwise.
anne1707 Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 I don't think Bathsheba Everdene could ever have been considered a possession.
Author Phateless Posted June 23, 2009 Author Posted June 23, 2009 He is mine and I am his. That's my MO for committed relationships, married or otherwise. Me too TBF. I just thought it was interesting because it does sum up the traditional gender roles quite well.
quankanne Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 sounds like some of the bodice rippers I read that are set in 19th century England: A man desires a comely lass, but cannot "have" her unless he marries her, so he does the deed just to get laid. And she gets the title of "Mrs."
2sure Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 I feel like I own my husband & my daughter. They are my family. They are mine. I mean, I couldn't sell them but... I know my H feels the same way about me. My Family. My Home. My Marriage. My Spouse. My Child.My Life. My Responsibilities. Yep - I own em. So, does H. Shared Ownership. A Partnership.
anne1707 Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 Bodice ripper does not do it justice. It is incredibly well written and heartbreaking at times.
quankanne Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 I was referring to the genre of tawdry romance novels set during that same period, sorry for the confusion!
laRubiaBonita Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 :confused:what do they want to be possessed by?
OpenBook Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 Possession is not possible, PERIOD. Ownership of another human being is the very definition of slavery. Marriage is not about "possessing" somebody, it's about OBLIGATION to them. You're making a vow to love, honor and cherish them for the rest of your life, no matter what. That's a big obligation! But you'll never be able to possess them.
anne1707 Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 I was referring to the genre of tawdry romance novels set during that same period, sorry for the confusion! I know you were Quank. It's not my favourite book (by far) but I just wanted to give it the respect it deserves.
Author Phateless Posted June 23, 2009 Author Posted June 23, 2009 Possession is not possible, PERIOD. Ownership of another human being is the very definition of slavery. Marriage is not about "possessing" somebody, it's about OBLIGATION to them. You're making a vow to love, honor and cherish them for the rest of your life, no matter what. That's a big obligation! But you'll never be able to possess them. I agree. It should always be a partnership. I consider my GF and I to be a team with a common goal - Love and Acceptance.
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 "It appears that ordinary men take wives because possession is not possible without marriage, and that ordinary women accept husbands because marriage is not possible without possession . . ." -Far From The Madding Crowd by Thomas Hardy As far as gender roles and the meaning of marriage are concerned, I don't pay attention to ideals from 1874.
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