mistieyed Posted June 21, 2009 Posted June 21, 2009 so, I was reading a thread here in the dating section about when a guy should share how he feels with a girl he has recently started dating, you know, the L word it got me thinking, what IS the norm for someone saying I Love You in a relationship? I have guy friends that say it immediately and others that would rather die to share their feelings....what is your take?
carhill Posted June 21, 2009 Posted June 21, 2009 I think, when the actions consistently support the words, it's time. I mean, if you're consistently showing love, why on earth would you not verbalize it? Not to be blunt, but if a guy has had his penis inside you for a couple months and ILY isn't forthcoming, even during sex, you have to wonder how serious he is, assuming what you want is a relationship. FWIW, I feel the same way about women. Any woman who holds back that way is and will be considered by me to be incompatible
WineCountry Posted June 21, 2009 Posted June 21, 2009 so, I was reading a thread here in the dating section about when a guy should share how he feels with a girl he has recently started dating, you know, the L word it got me thinking, what IS the norm for someone saying I Love You in a relationship? I have guy friends that say it immediately and others that would rather die to share their feelings....what is your take? I dont think you can put a time period on when to say I love you, because everyone's relationships move at different speeds. I believe when you can say it, and REALLY mean it, that is the time.
pinkbubbles Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 For example my bf and i have been dating for a year and we just recently said it to each other... btw i think that guy should say it first.
Maxis Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 btw i think that guy should say it first. I don't quite agree with that personally...I don't think it should be mandated who says it first in a relationship, but to each his own. By no means am I saying your opinion is wrong, simply stating my own. Ok then, back to the original question though. I agree with the people above mostly. It's all dependent on each individual couple, but why wait if you feel it? Personally, I have this weird little way of thinking about the L word. Saying "I love you" to me is like...I set you above the rest and you mean a lot to me compared to others. Whereas, to me, being IN love seems a little different. At that point i think being completely IN love is heading towards spending the rest of my life with the girl. It is my understanding that the "I love you" is more significant than that to a lot of people though. So it also depends on what you think those 3 words mean.
Sevenscars Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 You could say "I love you" to me ALL DAY, and nothing would come of it. Not until your very actions support that statement. If I had a woman who showed me love through consistent action, and yet never let those three words escape her lips, I would be absolutely fine. Words are words! If I said, "Tomorrow I will fly to Taiwan." Would you believe me? Not completely, until I stepped off that plane onto the Taiwanese soil. Now, Love is an even greater risk than a world-wide plane ride. Never tell me you love me unless you can follow through: show me. I will not accept the first without the latter.
dakotamaiden Posted June 27, 2009 Posted June 27, 2009 what about my guy friend he tells me i love after hes had 2 glasses of wine and we are usually talking on the phone. he told me once in person and wasnt drinking??? i dont think its love love but he feels something for me?? what do you think???? i get confused. i dont ask him what he means bt it either. i just enjoy that yeah he has feelings for me..
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