jqb05443 Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 The man I thought I was going to marry broke up with me 2 months ago after 3 years and told me yesterday that he doesn't want anything to do with me and doesn't want to be friends either. As you can imagine I am beyond crushed. I know time heals all wounds and I know that he will always hold a special place in my heart. I know I should start dating again to take my mind off him and start to move on. But that's the problem. I don't want to move on. Just the thought of talking to someone else, going out with someone else, being intimimate with someone else, affectionate completely makes my stomach turn. I don't want anyone else at all. I just want him. I don't think this feeling will ever leave me. I was with someone else for almost 10 years and I had no problem moving on. Sure it hurt but actually my current ex was the first person I dated after the 10 year relationship and this one hurts 10x worse. There was something really special about my current ex. I don't want to move on, I don't want to forget him. Does anyone else feel this way?
boogieboy Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 Thats actually what brings everyone to this board. Its perfectly normal to feel that way. In fact, its kind of good that you do, because you should not be dating anyone when you have your ex on your mind. It doesnt make a healthy relationship and it is unfair to the person youre dating. So take your time, get healed, find yourself, and thank your lucky stars that your ex cut himself out completely of your life. You will heal much faster that way. Many ex's keep in touch and extent the torture. And since he cut out on you so suddenly, you should work on NOT holding a special place in your heart for him. He does not deserve that. There will be a new guy sometime in your future that does deserve it.
scienceguy Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 He definitely sounds like a jerk. That's an incredibly cruel and insensitive way of behaving towards you, and he doesn't deserve to have you in his life. I get that breakups are always difficult, and fundamentally painful things, but I don't get why some people behave like total animals to somebody they used to love.
hrtbrk hotel tenant Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 i totally feel ya my gurl broke up wit me a couple wks ago and (i check her phone records) she has been constantly talkin to this guy who she briefly messed with and to make matters worse she was over his house the day after we broke up. last nite he called at 130 in the morning and they talked for an hour and a half. But i still love her and i want to be with her but i dont know if i can cuz she did some foul shyt and she seems deceitful..i am sooo confused right now but try to move forward. i will be starting tommorrow by not checkin her phone records or tryin not to bump into her(we go to the same gym) so NC is new to me so try that and see what happens.
Author jqb05443 Posted June 21, 2009 Author Posted June 21, 2009 When we first broke up I was NC for a week and the breakup hadn't fully hit me because i really thought he needed some time to think and that he would be back. after a week i broke NC and we talked here and there and hung out a few times and it was great, until i started pushing for us to get back together. i went away last week, gave him a card before i left saying how much i loved him and wanted to work things out and he told me he would think about it while i was gone. he reassured me there was no one else but who knows. i called when i got back and he seemed distant and cold and he told me yesterday that we should move on. i deleted him from facebook when he broke up with me and i have done good by not checking it since. i also have access to view his cell phone records online as he had given me his password but i have been to scared to even check it. the last time i hung out with him before i left he let me listen to a voicemail his friend left him on speaker and his password to access his cellphone was right in front of the screen when he put the phone in my face so i have that now too but i am just to scared to check. I have started NC today as i have failed for two months but after what he told me yesterday what more can i say at this point? nothing. i feel like i officially got dumped yesterday and the pain hurts soooo much
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